Mark Reads ‘The Wee Free Men’: Chapter 3, Part I

In the first part of the third chapter of The Wee Free Men, Miss Tick decides to intervene, and Tiffany imagines what witch school would be like. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to read Discworld. 


Miss Tick

So, let’s be real worried about this together, can we? It’s clear that Tiffany is the Chalk’s witch, and even Miss Tick can’t deny that All Signs Point to Witch. Right??? Yet if that’s the case, what is Miss Tick supposed to do next? It’s not like she can just say, “You’re a witch!,” and then just hope that clears the matter up. Tiffany needs all kinds of training, and thus, it’s time for me to worry. Because what the hell does this mean?

“D’you know what’ll be turning up?” she continued. “All the things they locked away in those old stories. All those reasons why you shouldn’t stray off the path, or open the forbidden door, or say the wrong word, or spill the salt. All the stories that gave children nightmares. All the monsters from under the biggest bed in the world. Somewhere, all stories are real and all dreams come true. And they’ll come true here if they’re not stopped.”

But why? All we know is that it is exceptional that the Nac Mac Feegle warned Tiffany. They don’t warn anybody. So Jenny must be the calm before the storm, which is pretty terrifying, given that JENNY WAS REVOLTING AND somehow, there is worse coming?


But if anyone can face down an entire parallel reality of the things that scare people the most, I feel like it could be Tiffany Aching.

Look, her reaction to Jenny is just so hilarious and touching to me. She was pissed that Jenny had the nerve to show up, and then she attacked it with a frying pan AFTER DOING RESEARCH!!! Who is better suited for fighting OTHERWORDLY CREATURES???

I love, though, that as dire as this is, there’s still a tenderness within Tiffany and her relationship with her grandmother. Grandma Aching is such a powerful figure in her past, and it’s clear that she influenced her granddaughter a great deal. (Probably intentionally.) There’s the story of her time with Lightning and Thunder, and it evokes images of lazy afternoons, of feeling whole and appreciated, and I admit: I’m a little envious. I COULD USE THAT, Y’ALL. But I think it’s this kind of love and support system that’s helped mold Tiffany into the kind of young girl she is. She does care about the world around her a great deal, probably more than most other people. You can see that in the way she processes information, in the interactions she has with the natural world. 

It’s only a matter of time, then, before the Nac Mac Feegle make contact with Tiffany to ask for her help. They’re OBVIOUSLY hunting for her, and that warning was the first step, right? They need her for whatever is coming through into the Chalk. AND SHE’S GONNA BECOME A WITCH AND I CAN’T WAIT. I’m so excited to watch this transformation!

Mark Links Stuff

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About Mark Oshiro

Perpetually unprepared since '09.
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