Mark Reads ‘Good Omens’: Saturday, Part III

In the third part of Saturday, Aziraphale struggles to find a way back while the Four Horsepeople of the Apocalypse pick up some friends for their final ride. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to read Good Omens.

Saturday, Part III

[For the purpose of following along, this review covers the Saturday chapter from page 264 to page 300 in the paperback edition, from the sentence, "She rode a red motorbike," to the sentence ending with, "… and she marched him out of the hall and down the stairs to Crouch End High Street, where an elderly scooter waited to take the two, well, call it three of them away." - Mark]

THERE IS TOO MUCH GOOD STUFF IN THIS BOOK.

  • The Four Horsepeople of the Apocalypse ride horses. By “horses,” I mean FUCKING MOTORCYCLES. This is so perfect and glorious, and I cannot handle it.
  • Hell’s Angels playing Trivia Scrabble. The image is so wonderful that I refuse to believe that these authors made it up. It has to have been based on a real thing they once saw.
  • I seriously adore that as each of the Riders appear in this bar, the categories on Trivia Scrabble instantly change. It’s funny, yes, but I love the consistency throughout the book. These metaphysical beings all affect the world in subtle ways whenever they interact with it, and it’s fun seeing how that manifests each time.
  • For example, not only does a category change in Trivia Scrabble when Pollution arrives, but “the entire rack seemed suddenly to have been coated in a light film of motor oil and dried egg.”
  • The one thing that finally makes Death speak up is someone insisting that Elvis died in 1976. I love this book so much.
  • “[Pollution] had taken over when Pestilence, muttering about penicillin, had retired in 1936 If only the old boy had known what opportunities the future had held… ” HAHAHA HOLY SHIT. I wonder why 1936, though? Fleming discovered it in 1928, and it didn’t go into mass production until 1943 or so. Still, I didn’t know that the Four Horsepeople could retire. Is there a place in Hell for retired demons and devils and spirits? WHAT IS IT LIKE THERE?
  • I think one of my favorite aspects of this all is the reaction the bikers give the Horsepeople. Big Ted is kind of excited to meet Death. (I’m guessing Big Ted is referring to Blue Oyster Cult’s Some Enchanted Evening cover.) And then he asks Death WHAT KIND OF MOTORCYCLE DEATH RIDES. Yes, Big Ted, you are my kind of friend.
  • Ugh, Adam has no idea what he’s doing. What if Aziraphale and Crowley arrive too late???
  • I didn’t understand the scene with Johnny Two Bones until the end. Aziraphale does not appear to be in Heaven. Well, he could be, but I finally got what was happening: he’s trying to find a way back in. And so he passes from person to person, possessing them in order to speak and find out where he is. Is there a way for him to become corporeal again? Where exactly is he? I do like that, similar to the Jamie Hernez scene in the last section, the authors give us these small portraits of people all over the world who “host” Aziraphale at one point.
  • I think the entire part with Marvin O. Bagman is the best. It’s funny, it can be read as a great condemnation of evangelist preachers who use their preaching to stay rich, and the final image of his entire crew losing their shit while Aziraphale excitedly asks if he’s on television is just too perfect for words.
  • You know, I’ve never really done anything for Mark Reads that was so funny, and it’s kind of an odd thing to write about. Like, analyzing why jokes are funny has the potential to strip those jokes of their funniness, you know?
  • So how is Crowley going to get out of this? Hell is pissed at him, and whatever happens, he’ll be collected for eternal torment. He’d have to do something to please them, but I can’t imagine what that might be.
  • Back to funny shit. Could there be a funnier scene in this whole book than the bikers following the Four Horsepeople of the Apocalypse and trying to determine what their names will be? I’m already a big fan of Capitalizing Unusual Things, but this is just too much. Things Not Working Properly Even After You’ve Given Them A Good Thumping But Secretly No Alcohol Lager. Really Cool People. Oh god, it’s beautiful. SO BEAUTIFUL.
  • I didn’t comment on Madame Tracy and her lovely brussels sprouts in the last review, and I admit that I had no idea how she played a part. It’s clear now that she’s very important to what’s going on. Though it’s hilarious that Aziraphale finds the soul of Ron and totally upstages the seance, scaring off everyone else. This is an Angel of God, remember. And he’s getting involved in seances.
  • A HAMMERHEAD SHARK FELL FROM THE SKY.
  • Newt views sex as a social custom. My god.
  • I love the irony that Shadwell exorcised Aziraphale, only to have Aziraphale appear inside Madame Tracy. He can’t escape him!
  • “This Antichrist – how many nipples has he?” STOP IT, SHADWELL, I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING.
  • SHADWELL’S HELMET IS BRIGHT GREEN AND SAYS EASY RIDER ON IT. This is the best book, oh my god.

It’s weird that I feel both excited for what else is going to happen, and I’m full of dread. Like, this could be a disaster, or it could be a party, or it could be both? Also, those four bikers riding along with the Four Horsepeople… they’re not going to have a good ending, are they? Probably not.

Ah, I can’t wait to read more.

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About Mark Oshiro

Perpetually unprepared since '09.
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