Mark Reads ‘A Clash of Kings’

In A Clash of Kings, Westeros is thrown into chaos as various houses and families begin to vie for control of the Iron Throne. In the process, the main cast of characters is strewn about the world, searching for a way to return home and return to stability. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to read A Clash of Kings.

never prepared.

not now.

not ever.


I am beginning to understand the joy and the furious frustration that comes with reading the Song of Ice and Fire series. It took me about three weeks to read A Game of Thrones, which is not that bad, considering I really only get time to read when I’m commuting to and from work on AC Transit or BART. I continued on into A Clash of Kings what what I thought was a good amount of preparation. I’d watched the show and then read the book the show was taken from, and it helped me to really wrap my mind around these characters, the names, the locations, and the beautiful character arcs of that first book. I was so ecstatic to find out what would happen to these characters that it took me eight days to finish A Clash of Kings.

And no amount of preparation helped me. Let’s compare my predictions to reality so we can all laugh at how terrible I was at guessing the direction of A Clash of Kings, shall we? It’ll actually be a great way to discuss a lot of this book, and then I’ll move on to some miscellaneous thoughts after that.

  1. Arya Stark will make it to the Wall, but it will be after Jon Snow has left to travel north of the Wall. I ACTUALLY THOUGHT THAT LYRA WOULD MAKE IT TO THE WALL! [Clearly my brain is still on HDM. ARYA. Not Lyra. ARYA.] My thoughts are so precious, aren’t they? But this is one of many things about this book that was so unexpected (and infuriating) that it made me want to never pick up the book again. The entire attack on the holdfast is so terribly upsetting to me, especially when Woth is killed, because it’s a sign that, if anything, A Clash of Kings is about chaos. There are so many variables, motivations, and emotional pursuits at stake here; because of that, it makes the story as unpredictable as one could imagine. The whole thing is one of the first moments of pure WTF-ery, but it’s not even CLOSE to the worst one. 
  2. She will then discover a way to sneak out of the Wall and will meet up with Jon at the end of the novel. The amount of ironic tragedy in this prediction actually hurts me. Oh god, I had so much hope. So very much of it!
  3. Jon Snow will encounter something worse than a wight by the end of the novel. OH MY GOD DOES THIS COUNT. I am going to count the forced “betrayal” of Halfhand by Jon in order to infiltrate the wildlings as something worse than a wight. Because how fucking heart-breaking is that? It hurts. It hurts so badly. Seriously, Jon Snow, I love your journey, even though it pains me to read about how awful things are for you. Craster’s Keep, to Fist of the First Men, to the trek through the Skirling Pass, Jon’s entire plot in ACOK is one prolonged exercise in building tension until that unbelievable ending. And I love it. GRRM teases us with what’s beyond the Wall, takes us beyond it, and then gives us something we could never have anticipated. Oh god, I LOVE IT. 
  4. Samwell will die when he goes north of the wall. (I hate typing that because I adore him so much, but if Ned Stark can die, any other character who I enjoy can die as well.) Well, thankfully Samwell is still alive, but ANYONE CAN DIE. ANYONE CAN DIE. And so many people die in this book, but I’ll wait to get to the best one. 
  5. Bran will remember how he fell from the tower, and will use that information to help his brother Robb fight against the Lannisters. Well, no. Not at all. WHO COULD HAVE GUESSED THAT BRAN WOULD OPEN HIS THIRD EYE AND ENTER SUMMER? (Yes, this sounds dirty, but you know what I’m trying to say.) I mean WHAT THE FUCK. One of the things I love about A Clash of Kings is that it slowly enters the realm of the fucking bizarre. Davos’s chapters? Daenarys’s chapters? Renly??? oh my god THIS BOOK. I must admit, though, that it took me until the fifth of Bran’s chapters to actually be interested in his story. LOOK, I JUST WANTED HIM TO DO HIS WOLF THING AND MOVE ON TO SOMETHING ELSE. I liked Jojen a lot, but the story just didn’t intrigue me much. It felt drawn out. And then….well, wait. I can talk about that in the next one.
  6. Robb will give Theon Greyjoy a huge responsibility during a specific battle, but Theon’s arrogance/ego will get in the way and he’ll fail at what he was ordered to die and he will die. FUCK YOU, THEON GREYJOY. I HATE YOU. THERE IS NO CHARACTER IN THE HISTORY OF EVER THAT I DESPISE MORE THAN YOU. First of all, his very first chapter makes me want to kill everything ever because HOLY MISOGYNY. Do you realize how hard it is to read chapters through a character’s eyes when that dude CLEARLY DESPISES ALL WOMEN FOREVER? I never want to read about Theon having sex again. Or having an erection. Or having anything to do with a living creature, for that matter. I hate him, I hate his stinking face, and I only wish terrible things would happen to him. In Theon, I am given what I think is one of the only huge flaws in these books: holy shit, not one sex worker/prostitute is given even the slightest bit of respect aside from Shae, and even that is barely enough. I think GRRM has written some fantastic women into his series, but like…dude, do any of these women have agency? Do they ever get chapters devoted to them, do they ever experience character growth, or are they ever more than what they do? Again, reading through Theon’s chapters was an exercise in how miserable I could be. If it weren’t for Balon Greyjoy putting Theon in his place, or the BRILLIANT Asha chapter/reveal, or for Theon’s utter failure at Winterfell, I would easily claim that Theon’s chapters were complete wastes and infuriatingly offensive. And then he MURDERS BRAN AND RICKON. OH MY GOD. That reveal, given so matter-of-factly from a third party, made me first feel guilty for not liking Bran’s chapters that much, and then I was ~filled with endless rage.~ That kind of rage that just makes me want to stop reading. How many times will GRRM do this to me? Oh god, probably a billion.
  7. We will finally meet Stannis Baratheon! We kind of have to, since he is laying a claim to the Iron Throne. Oh, yay! I finally got one right. STANNIS, YOU STONE FOX. You are quite wonderful, but your wife…well, I’ll get to that. 
  8. Jamie Lannister will escape imprisonment by the halfway point of the novel. Hahahaha, seriously! Seriously, I was so wrong.
  9. Tyrion will attempt to travel to King’s Landing, but won’t make it there before the halfway point of the novel. I think something or someone will stop him from getting there. IT’S LIKE I SWITCHED ARYA’S AND TYRION’S STORY. Holy fuck, so so so so so wrong. But who else sort of LOVES Tyrion running King’s Landing? He’s a flawed character, for sure, but I’m drawn to the way he treats other people. It’s so different than anyone else. In particular, I came to enjoy every time he spoke with Sansa, and I thought he was the one person who dealt with her in the most genuine manner possible. Dare I say he cared just a tiny bit about what happened to her? Maybe just a smidgeon, but I think it’s there. He feels sympathy for her being forced into a position she has no say about, and that might be because he’s had the same lot in life. But I’ll discuss Tyrion and his work at King’s Landing separately from this. 
  10. Cersei Lannister will take a more pronounced role as the Hand of the King/Regent (whatever she is), and will not allow Joffrey to make any real decisions, and that will in turn transform him into an even bigger shitbag than he already is. Okay, am I right about this? Cersei wasn’t the Hand of the King, but she basically was ruling King’s Landing to an extent and, independent of that, Joffrey became even more disgusting…okay, so I’m not right. DAMN IT. Fuck King Joffrey, by the way. Also, Cersei is SO CONFUSING IN THIS BOOK. I don’t know whether to despise her or sympathize with her and THIS PAINS ME. 
  11. Sansa (I LOVE YOU SANSA) will plot with someone we have not met to murder Joffrey and Cersei, but will abandon this by the end of the book when a better plan is proposed. OH, SANSA. I have grown to enjoy you even more than in A Game of Thrones. She has become such a fascinating character to me. She’s been forced to accept that her idea of a fairy tale, majestic life in royalty isn’t a possibility anymore. Well, at least for the time being. Sansa’s chapters are difficult to read, but for an entirely different reason: I want her to escape King’s Landing more than anything. Her meetings with Dontos gave me some hope, but I felt like nothing would come to fruition throughout the book. I’m glad Sansa had hope, but I was also aching some moment of heartbreak in the future. That moment has nothing to do with Dontos, and instead comes when she has her first period. She’s in King’s Landing when it happens, and that means she’ll certainly be forced to have children with Joffrey. That broke my heart more than anything because it was the worst possible news for her. And then during the battle with Stannis, everything is even more awful because Ser Ilyn has been ordered to kill Cersei, Sansa, and everyone else if the city falls. And look, after Eddard, I don’t want to ever trust the threat of death being a fluke again. If GRRM says a character can die, GUESS WHAT. THEY CAN. So then I started panicking that Sansa would die and look, I really want her on the Iron Throne. There. I said it. I think she’s the best person for it. Look how she takes control when Cersei leaves Maegor’s Holdfast, and how she comforts those left behind. I stand by this claim COME AT ME BRO. And her story ends with a date for escape? OH GOD I DON’T WANT TO HAVE HOPE BECAUSE I KNOW GRRM WILL CRUSH IT.
  12. King Renly will eventually concede the crown to Stannis and join up with his brother by the novel’s end. Hahahahaahah WHAT THE FUCK!!!! So, literally, just after the disastrous meeting between Stannis and Renly, I found myself thinking, “Wow, I kind of like Renly a lot. He’s arrogant as hell, but I liked how he composed himself. Maybe he would be a good king, and maybe I should rethink who I want to reign victorious and HOLY GODDAMN SHIT WHAT THE FUCK HOW DOES A SHADOW KILL A MAN WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK. Well, there goes that hope.
  13. Daenarys and Ser Mormont will travel to Asshai first to begin recruiting people to cross the Narrow Sea. The existence of her dragons will help this. What the holy fuck was I even thinking? Asshai??? Was I sleep-deprived when I wrote this? Good god, I could not be more wrong. Again, I am enamored with the story of Daenarys, and I love what a huge contrast she is in ACOK when you compare her to how she was in AGOT. She commands attention and respect, yet she struggles with the Dothraki exodus. Her bloodriders, Ser Jorah Mormont, and a small band of folks stay with her and the dragons, and her once-large army is vastly reduced. I like that GRRM acknowledges that the mere existence of dragons only changes Daenarys’s predicament slightly. They’re not grown or controlled, though they do bring about a sense of power and wonder, which is what initially helps her out when she finally reaches Qarth. I say finally in that way that implies a heavy sigh of relief, because the chapters where Daenarys is crossing the Red Waste are INVARIABLY DIFFICULT TO GET THROUGH. I still think of her as experiencing her own story separate from that of the Iron Throne because of her geographical position, but I know that eventually, she’ll have to cross the Narrow Sea at some point. And I know that this puts her at odds with my totally awesome “Sansa-As-Queen-of-Iron-Throne” prediction, but I just want things to go right for Daenarys. I thought she was getting that moment in Quarth, but then THE HOUSE OF THE UNDYING. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT????? BEST SCENE IN THE BOOK OR BEST SCENE IN THE BOOK. Actually, there’s another one that might compete with that, and I’ll get to it in a second. I sort of want to write down all the visions the warlocks gave her because I bet GRRM will satisfy each and every one. OH GOD. Also I LOVE YOU XARO XHOAN DAXOS, YOU CAN MARRY ME, THANKS. Also SHE IS GOING BACK TO PENTOS holy god THIS FUCKING SERIES.
  14. Daenarys will encounter Dothraki soldiers by the end of the novel and will fight them, with the help of her dragons, to defeat them, thereby making her the most powerful force in the East, so that by the end of the novel, she will have gathered a massive army to cross the Narrow Sea. Oh, I am seriously a gift. How. How did I think this. What is wrong with me. Everything hurts.
  15. We will discover that Syrio Forel is still alive. Nope. Well, no real confirmation that he is dead, either.
  16. Lord Varys will be incredibly difficult with Tyrion when he arrives at King’s Landing, but we won’t find out why until the end of the novel. So fucking wrong, and SERIOUSLY LORD VARYS IS SO AMAZING IN THIS BOOK. I SHIP HIM WITH MYSELF ONLY SO WE CAN GO ON ADVENTURES. Oh my god, his transformation to assisting Tyrion is so beautiful I could weep. I cannot wait to see this on screen in season two of Game of Thrones.
  17. Lord Baelish will die by the end of the book. NOPE. HE HAS HARRENHAL. GOOD LORD. WHAT THE HELL.
  18. By the halfway point, we will find out that Benjen Stark died. Nope. Not even close again.
  19. Tywin Lannister will forbid Shae from coming to King’s Landing, and it will break Tyrion’s heart to leave her behind. However, she will find a way to sneak in by the end of the book. What is this? Didn’t Tywin forbid Shae to come to King’s Landing in A Game of Thrones? Why did I type this? Also, SO WRONG ABOUT SNEAKING HER IN. Also, I feel like GRRM kind of wasted her potential in this book. She wasn’t in the book as much as I would have liked.
  20. Catelyn Stark will return to Winterfell to be with her sons and will not join Robb in battle. No, I seriously understand how fucking amazing it must be to read my predictions and just laugh until you can’t breathe. I mean, I wasn’t even on the same fucking WAVELENGTH with this prediction. I do like Catelyn quite a bit, though I wish she’d get over her hatred of Jon Snow because clearly he is magical and wonderful, though her parts in this book thankfully stayed far away from that. We are given a woman who is fierce, determined, and purposely breaks the roles she is supposed to follow in this caste society. Yes, she’s not fighting battles, but how many women (and widows of “traitor” kings) go to make peace alone on behalf of men? She straight up doesn’t care, and I really adore that about her. Also, Brienne + Catelyn = Everything I Want From Life. We’ll get to Brienne later. But for now: IS CATELYN GOING TO KILL JAIME. OH MY GOD. Also, her backstory is SO SAD. This book. This book.
  21. Bran will discover some sort of ~magical~ method to heal his paralysis, will agree to do it, but it will not work. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
  22. Jon Snow will learn of a possible character who could be his mother by the end of the novel. Yeah, pretty sure Jon had a million other things to deal with. The only reason I made this prediction is because people said it was a “thing” that people were trying to guess who Jon’s mother was, so I wrote this, and then I embarrassed myself. Multiple times. In a row. Oh, the shame.
  23. Jon Snow will get separated from Ghost until the end of the book. WHAT IS THIS PATHETIC PREDICTION.
  24. Catelyn will find out who sent someone to kill Bran with Tyrion’s dagger. OH, HOW FANTASTICALLY SATISFYING WAS CATELYN’S LAST CHAPTER WHERE SHE CONFRONTS JAIME? Oh my god, I am so pleased. I can see how the show included just a bit of this at the end of episode ten of Game of Thrones, but it packs a much bigger punch here, especially because Jaime admits so much of what happened. And I actually believe him that the Lannisters had nothing to do with the dagger and the attempt on Bran’s life. So….yeah, I have no fucking clue who is responsible. BACK TO SQUARE ONE.
  25. Arya will train her sword fighting at the Wall, and her improvement will save someone’s life at the end of the novel. MY HEART. MY POOR HEART. Not in a million years would I have thought that Arya would be intercepted on her way to the wall, LET ALONE BE TAKEN TO HARRENHAL. Oh my god, I love the parallel to Sansa. Both of Ned’s daughters are held captive in places far from home, and both fear doing anything to set themselves free. Arya’s story is still my absolute favorite out of every character in the series, and it’s great to see her develop a friendship with Gendry, who I expected to NEVER SHOW UP AGAIN. And now he’s a main supporting character! And he is lovely! But their relationship is not as intriguing to me as the one between Arya and H’ghar. When Arya started to develop that prayer that named every person she wished were dead, I got this idea in my head that I would love if this book turned into Arya becoming an assassin to AVENGE HER FATHER’S DEATH. Then H’ghar shows up. And does it for her. Twice. He also helps with overthrowing Harrenhal as well. (Um….so Petyr is made Lord of Harrenhal. I assume Tywin Lannister has no idea what happened there? Won’t that be weird when he arrives?) I am so excited to see when and where H’ghar will show up again. Though I suppose the biggest development in Arya’s character comes right at the end, when she slays a guard without the slightest hesitation. It’s not the first time she’s done it, but she killed that child at the end of A Game of Thrones in a much less calculating method. Here, she helps Gendry and Hot Pie escape by slitting a guard’s throat. WHAT WILL THE FUTURE HOLD????

So. I got 2 out of 25. That has to be a world record or something. What a miserable performance. Yet, that excites me! Who knew I’d be so awful? Oh, that’s right: GRRM knew. And he is cackling at me right now.

I still have a lot of thoughts. Can we discuss them?

  • Melisande. Yeah, hello. You confused me for so long, and I didn’t understand your religion. I understood why people despised you and feared you, but I didn’t understand why Stannis himself was so enamored with you. (I’m not sure I do yet, but all of the chapters from Davos’s point of view give me a better idea.) You worship the Lord of Light, from the East, with few followers in Westeros. I still don’t get the ramifications of this religion, but I understand that their messiah will wield a sword of fire? Or something like that? Either way, I didn’t expect to learn much about you, but I knew that there was something strange about you. How else could Renly have died by a shadow?I will say that there is no moment in all of A Clash of Kings that is as shocking, bizarre, or bewildering quite like when Davos accompanies Melisande to Storm’s End and watches her GIVE BIRTH TO A FUCKING SHADOW PERSON WHO SNEAKS INTO THE CASTLE TO MURDER SOMEONE. Oh, and the shadow LOOKS LIKE STANNIS. I can’t. I CAN’T. WHAT THE HOLY FUCK.
  • Brienne is wonderful and I love her awkwardness because it is my awkwardness, and I love how much she loved Renly, and I adore her relationship with Catelyn, and I just want to be best friends with her, okay?
  • THE BATTLE OF BLACKWATER RUSH. Who fucking knew that ships sailing against one another could be so exciting? It’s pure chaos, perhaps the most chaotic moment of the whole book, and GRRM does a beautiful job navigating the details, the action, and a huge bout of character development for Davos and Tyrion without ever confusing me for a second. That is talent, my dear readers. Also, I HOPE DAVOS IS NOT DEAD. Also, TYRION WAS BETRAYED. As if his life needed anymore complication or terror, GRRM nearly kills him off. It’s almost worse than if he’d just killed him off, and for a second, I actually believed he was dead. For a man who wants to be in the action and who plotted throughout A Clash of Kings to wield control away from his sister and from Joffrey, his end is an utter nightmare. He is incapacitated, deformed by a cut to the face, his father has taken his position as Hand to the King, and Bronn has been knighted. And he’s stuck in bed. Good fucking god.
  • I’m so glad Osha is around so much. She’s become one of Bran’s best friends, and I respect her loyalty to him.
  • Speaking of Bran, HE IS NOT DEAD! When I got to the final chapter and saw it was from Bran’s point of view, I thought it would all be a dream. But Theon killed THE WRONG PEOPLE. He and Rickon survived, though Winterfell and Master Luwin did not. That final line is so powerful, too, because even if he recognizes his limitations, it feels like a huge turning point for him. He is not gone; perhaps he will use this to his advantage in the next book.
  • Theon’s not dead, is he? GOD, WHY NOT.
  • Hey, so….not much of Robb at all. That’s weird. He won a lot of stuff?
  • seriously unprepared.

I’ll post my predictions for A Storm of Swords next week. I don’t know what day I’ll have them done, as I haven’t written them or started the third book in the series, but it won’t replace a Harry Potter review. You’ll just get two posts that day!

I am just noticing that this review is creeping over four thousand words in length, so I think that for the next book, I’ll split my reviews into two or three parts for the sake of brevity on my part. The next book is massive in length, and it was already hard enough to condense this all down to a single review. I’ll let you know on Twitter (@MarkDoesStuff) when the next review is coming up, and what chapters it covers! Until then, happy reading!

About Mark Oshiro

Perpetually unprepared since '09.
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196 Responses to Mark Reads ‘A Clash of Kings’

  1. Ryan Lohner says:

    Nothing about Ramsey Snow? He's largely considered the most evil, reprehensible character in the whole story, which for this series is really saying something. He already forced a woman to marry him, then starved her until she ate her fingers!

    • cait0716 says:

      I'd actually forgotten about Ramsey Snow, though this certainly jogged my memory. He's such a bit character, and most of what he does happens off page, so I think it's pretty easy to forget about him. I mean, he's clearly awful, but he isn't a constant source of awful the way Joffrey is.

      Spoilers for A Storm of Swords:
      V'z npghnyyl xvaq bs hcfrg nobhg ubj zhpu unccra va fgbez bs fjbeqf gung jr qvqa'g trg gb frr. Zbfgyl gur qrngu bs Onyba Terlwbl. V arneyl zvffrq gung vg unq unccrarq ng nyy. Fbzrgvzrf V guvax gurer ner n srj gbb znal cybg guernqf va guvf obbx.

    • Julezyme says:

      barf! seriously, my stomach heaves – and the other characters keep bringing it up! which, okay, i get … but it made me feel pukey every time.

    • xpanasonicyouthx says:

      Oh christ, I totally forgot about him! Like cait0716, he's never ACTUALLY on the page, so he slipped my mind.

    • CynicalNymph says:

      You know, I called the "Bran and Rickon aren't really dead, these are some other boys" thing, but I was completely blown away on the Ramsey Snow reveal. Utterly unprepared.

  2. knut_knut says:

    I haven't read this yet, but there is a WHOLE LOT OF BOLD. I am excited! And no, you're not prepared for ASoS. Never 😛

    Edit: goddamn it the bold are your answers! I need to stop commenting before I read your whole post! I got excited, ok? *shame*

  3. Andrea says:


    Lyra = Arya?? hmmm.. I like this 🙂

    • cait0716 says:

      Me too. Does that mean Pan = Nymeria?

      • monkeybutter says:

        Gendry = Will. In ten years, so it's not gross.

        It starts to fall apart when you get to their parents though, because Ned = Lee, Mrs Coulter is totally Cersei, and Lord Asriel is Tywin, which is just wrong, even by Lannister standards.

        • cait0716 says:

          So the GreatJon = Iorek, right? Then they can hang out in the north together (or could before these books began)

          I like Gendry being Will mostly because if I ship Arya with anyone, it's with Gendry. Though I really like her on her own, too.

          • knut_knut says:

            Does that make Renly/Loras Baruch/Balthamos by default?

            I shipped Arya and Gendry so hard until I saw them on the show and then I just felt like a monster. Maybe in 10 years…

    • Julezyme says:

      Haha. I caught that too. And I wondered if Mark had made a (Freudian?) typo and didn't notice it, made a typo and did notice it and thought it was fitting so left it in, or was being very meta and clever referencing how Arya and Lyra are similar character archetypes and blend together in his mind.

  4. Jenny_M says:

    When I thought Bran and Rickon were dead I was SO UPSET. SO UPSET you don't even KNOW.

    Then in a couple of chapters when Theon was like "lol nah j/k i killed some peasants instead" I had to get up and walk away and do something else for a while because OMG FRIGGIN' GRRM.

    • cait0716 says:

      Same. I spent chapters just refusing the believe that Bran and Rickon were dead. It was just too much to bear. And then I was ecstatic when they weren't dead.

      • Julezyme says:

        I was very pleased with myself, because I actually called this plot twist when Theon went out with just Reek, who had brought the mysterious bag. Booya! One of my rare, rare good calls. 😉

        Which, by the way: Bu zl tbq, jung unccraf yngre gb Gurba jvgu Fve Enzfnl, vf gung rabhtu bs n avtugzner gb fbeg bs erqrrz uvf punenpgre rire fb fyvtugyl? Znlor, znlor abg, ohg qrne ybeq, trbetr eeznegva, gung jnf n pehry nff gjvfg bs sngr. Cbbe Znex, V nz jbeevrq nobhg uvz orvat genhzngvmrq jura ur trgf gb gur Fve Enzfnl puncgref. V nz fgvyy genhzngvmrq.

        • Jenny_M says:

          In my own personal feelings (which I understand may not be the general fandom reaction, idk):

          Ubyl fuvg, lrf. V arire gubhtug V pbhyq srry bar bhapr bs rzcngul sbe ubeevq Gurba Terlwbl rire ntnva ohg va NQJQ V jnf whfg yvxr "BZT GURBA EHA NJNL SEBZ GUNG ONFGNEQ FABJ*!"

          *abg gb or pbashfrq jvgu gur avpr Onfgneq Fabj jub jr nyy yvxr naq vf abg qrnq, E'uyybeqnzavg. UR'F WHFG FYRRCVAT.

        • pica_scribit says:

          Totally. Whfg nf nal punenpgre pna qvr, nal punenpgre pna rnea erqrzcgvba.

    • monkeybutter says:

      I refused to believe they were dead when I first read it and kept powering through just to make sure I was right. Otherwise, that would have been a wallbook moment.

    • knut_knut says:

      I was SO PROUD of myself because I guessed that Theon killed the 2 peasant children, not Bran and Rickon. It may have been because I was in serious denial though…

      • Jenny_M says:

        I so feel you. I have these predictions that I've made based on stuff that happened at the end of ADWD and NOBODY WILL EVER TELL ME I AM WRONG. Even though knowing GRRM it will be twelve or thirteen years before we find out.

        • knut_knut says:

          But but he has to finish the final 2 books soon or else the show will catch up with him and then the child actors will be too old and it will be a DISASTER!

    • quenstalof says:

      I had to cheat! I went and looked at the table of contents.

  5. knut_knut says:

    Hopefully this comment will not be as full of fail as my first one -_- It was really interesting to hear your thoughts on Dany because for me, this book was when my love affair with her started to end. I haven’t read the book in a while, so I’m going to be a bit vague on the details, but I felt like she didn’t do anything. She ended GoT with such a high and with so much potential that it was frustrating to see her just kind of sitting around. I know these books are more about politics than epic battles, but because her chapters are so separate from all the others, I found them kind of boring and wished GRRM would spice them up a bit. Not that the bit in the House of the Undying wasn’t exciting, but for me, it was too little too late. I also still don’t think she would make a very good ruler of Westeros, and don’t necessarily understand her claim. She knows nothing about Westeros, and yea, her dragons are pretty cool, but Westeros is all about being sneaky and subtle, and dragons are the exact opposite of subtlety.

    • xpanasonicyouthx says:

      True, and I can't deny that, but what bores/frustrates you totally worked for me. I love that she isn't continuing in the same vein as the last book. I have this weird thing where I love characters being disappointed and frustrated? I mean, HELLO, my favorite HP book is Order of the Phoenix.

      But I totally get why you wouldn't like her story!

      • knut_knut says:

        I'm hoping that this is all building up to some epic take over in the final books, but knowing GRRM one of her dragons will probably eat her or something and everything will be terrible 🙁

        • cait0716 says:

          If that happens I will be really really mad and disappointed. Dany had better make it to Westeros by the end, otherwise her entire narrative becomes almost pointless. GRRM can't just refuse to ever integrate her story with the rest.

          • xpanasonicyouthx says:

            So far, I would happy with one of three endings, and all are ridiculous:

            1) Sansa takes the Iron Throne and makes Daenarys her like….co-queen. Because how badass would that be? It would be perfect.
            2) Dany makes it to Westeros and her dragons annihilate everyone.
            3) Whatever is beyond the Wall arrives when Winter comes and eats everyone.

            Part of me wants #3 more than everything.

            • cait0716 says:

              I could so get behind an ending where everyone dies. I could see GRRM doing that, too

            • knut_knut says:

              The way things are going now I’m leaning towards #3 but I like #1 too! A lot of people think the title, A Song of Ice and Fire refers to Jon and Dany ruling Westeros BUT WHAT IF it was Sansa and Dany! She’s a Stark! SHE COULD BE THE ICE!! IT IS COMPLETELY PLAUSIBLE AND I REFUSE TO BE TOLD OTHERWISE

              • pica_scribit says:

                V svther Qnal unf gb pubbfr gjb pb-ehyref, naq fvapr fur fhccbfrqyl pnaabg unir puvyqera (hayrff TEEZ tvirf hf njnl nebhaq gur jvfrjbzna'f cebcurfl, juvpu V jbhyqa'g chg cnfg uvz), fur unf gb pubbfr n zna naq n jbzna.

                • knut_knut says:

                  V xabj, gurer jnf gur jubyr Qnal vf oneera cneg gung ehvarq zl qernzf 🙁 Gung’f npghnyyl bar bs gur ernfbaf jul V qba’g yvxr gur vqrn bs Qnal nf ehyre bs Jrfgrebf- gurer’f gur jubyr fhpprffvba dhrfgvba naq jura fur qvrf gur jubyr cynpr jvyy snyy onpx vagb ghezbvy. V pbhyq frr TEEZ oevat onpx Qnal’f novyvgl gb unir puvyqera, gubhtu.

                  "Jura jvyy ur or nf ur jnf?" Qnal qrznaqrq.
                  "Jura gur fha evfrf va gur jrfg naq frgf va gur rnfg," fnvq Zveev Znm Qhhe. "Jura gur frnf tb qel naq zbhagnvaf oybj va gur jvaq yvxr yrnirf. Jura lbhe jbzo dhvpxraf ntnva, naq lbh orne n yvivat puvyq. Gura ur jvyy erghea, naq abg orsber."

                  V xabj Zveev Znm Qhhe jnf hfvat gur yvar nobhg Qnal’f jbzo dhvpxravat ntnva gb fnl gung Qebtb jvyy arire erghea, ohg V pbhyq frr TEEZ tbvat FRR! FUR FNVQ JURA, FB VG JVYY UNCCRA.

                  • monkeybutter says:

                    V ybir gur sna gurbel gung gur fha vf Dhragla Znegryy qlvat, naq gung Qnal zvfpneevrq ng gur raq bs NQJQ, naq zvtug abg or vasregvyr. Rira gubhtu Qebtb jba'g pbzr onpx nf ur jnf, V'z ernyyl rkpvgrq gung Zveev Znm Qhhe zvtug abg unir orra gnhagvat Qnal, ohg gryyvat ure gur gehgu. V'z abg fher vs V jnag ure ehyvat Jrfgrebf (vg'f gur fznyy-e erchoyvpna va zr, V ungr zbanepuf, yby) ohg V qb jnag ure gb or unccl.

              • Saber says:

                If we're having co-rulers now, why not JON AND DANY AND SANSA?

                NO? NO? YES.

                • kyrissa says:

                  YES! Then my secret Jon/Dany OTP can be complete. I still have no idea why I want them together, it has to be some sort of ridiculous shipper reaction to GRRM's unending twists and turns.

                  *insert now kiss pic here*

                  Also, is this really a theory? Because it excites me greatly.

                • ninjac8 says:

                  How about Dany And Sansa co-queens and Jon as the Hand of the Queens? That would be awesome.

  6. cait0716 says:

    I think a lot of the early Bran chapters are boring because Bran himself is so bored. He doesn't care what's going on and since we're seeing everything from his point of view, it's hard for us to care. Perhaps it could have been handled a bit better though.

    I have this pet theory that Syrio Forel is Jaqen H'ghar. It makes no sense. I don't know how I came up with it (other than the Arya connection and the fact that both chracters say "Just so", but I think everyone from Braavos does that). At any rate, it's my theory and I'm holding on to it as tightly as I can. Because I want so badly for Syrio to still be alive and helping Arya.

    I think The Lord of Light is a reference to Christianity. I want to see how this story plays out with the clashing of the One God religion with the other pagan religions, especially in light of how that actually worked out in our world. Also, can anyone tell me how to pronounce R'hllor? I always say "Roller" and I'm sure that's not quite right.

    I also really liked the way GRRM framed all of the opening chapters around the comet. It was a nice way to introduce everyone and remind us of who they were and what they wanted and how big their egos were. Personally, I think it was a harbringer for Dany, but who knows? I also love how they incorporated it into the GoT opening credits.

    • drippingmercury says:

      I agree about the Lord of Light being a reference to Christianity. I think the Seven are, also – the set up of the church and a lot of their hierarchy, tenets, rituals, etc. seem very similar to Catholicism.

      As to how to pronounce it, I suppose it's pronounced something like "Rulore" – at one point a character spells it phonetically. I am eagerly awaiting season 2 so I can finally figure out how the hell to pronounce all this shit!

      • cait0716 says:

        I like the Seven being the Catholicism metaphor. Rfcrpvnyyl jura gurl fgneg trggvat vagrecergrq nf frira snprf bs bar tbq

        I can't wait for season 2! I really want to see how Tyrion, Varys, and Littlefinger all play off each other in the show. Those are going to be some fun scenes.

    • monkeybutter says:

      Thirding the Lord of Light = Christianity comparison just because it's monotheistic, however I also agree with drippingmercury that the Seven are quite similar to Christianity in practice. Somewhat relatedly, I like Melisandre a lot more upon reread. She's less strange, somehow.

      Naq Wndra vf gur Nypurzvfg! V ershfr gb oryvrir gung Flevb vf qrnq, naq V yvxr gb guvax gung ur jnf ybbxvat bhg sbe Neln. V whfg arrq fbzr pbzsbeg va nyy bs gur qrngu naq qrfgehpgvba.

      The GoT credits are a thing of beauty.

      • cait0716 says:

        I'm still not quite sure what to make of Melisandre. She's very powerful in a way I can't quite wrap my head around. Like, I don't quite get her relationship with Stannis.

        I just finished Storm of Swords. Will I be spoiled if I read your rot13ed comment?

    • knut_knut says:

      OOO! I really like your Syrio/Jaqen theory! They’re both Braavosi and they’re both friends with Arya, that’s all the evidence I need!

      I always say “Rollo”, like the candy, but I’m pretty sure that isn’t right. I’m also excited to see how the religion story will play out. I like The Seven because they don’t give birth to creepy shadow babies, but I like Melisandre and Stannis and don’t want them to be completely discredited.

    • tethysdust says:

      I always pronounced it Rih-LORE.

    • Anseflans says:

      I have this pet theory that Syrio Forel is Jaqen H'ghar.

      I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO THINKS THIS!!! :D_But seriously, if the man can change his face, it's totally possible! And it's possible he changed his face at the castle to avoid being arrested, but then got caught for some other thing (allthough to be fair, who would be able to catch Syrio Forel?!), and got picked to go to the Wall.

      Okay, I'm not making any sense at all ever, so Imma stop embarrasing myself now.

      • cait0716 says:

        All of this. Exactly. 😀

        • @RaudhrGarm says:

          Also remember that he was last seen taking on a member of Joffrey's Kingsguard. Now, if he did eventually beat down Ser Whoever, he'd probably be given a place in the black cells (where Yoren picked him up) because of the way he pissed off the whitecloak. But then, change-your-face and bam! That nasty Braavosi escaped and who gives a fuck about this weird man with red and white hair?

          Also, the funny irony when Robert's small council discuss hiring a Faceless Man to kill Daenarys while Ned employed one to teach his daughter some swordskills.

    • pica_scribit says:

      Audiobooks (which are freakin' AWESOME, BTW! Roy Dotrice FTW!) say "Ruh-lore", so that's how I do it, too.

  7. Ryan Lohner says:

    Heh, you're still not ready to leave Lyra, are you?

    So, you didn't pick up the reveal that Theon faked the deaths from when he thought over the whole thing at the end of his chapter after the "reveal"?

    • xpanasonicyouthx says:

      I TOTALLY DIDN'T! I thought they were legit dead.

    • CynicalNymph says:

      You know what makes it extra sad, though, even though we never met the boys? It's possible they were Theon's sons. We know he "tumbled" the Miller's wife at least "once or twice," and there's a reference about her mill being "lonely," so it's not too far fetched, I think, to imagine that her husband wasn't around her much. As I said above, I've barely gotten going in ASoS so I could be totally thinking wrong, but give that Theon is… Theon, it's not hard to imagine him sleeping with this woman repeatedly when he lived at Winterfell (even if he couldn't think of her name).

      • cait0716 says:

        I didn't even think of that. That's heartbreaking and makes me hate Theon even more.

        • xpanasonicyouthx says:


        • CynicalNymph says:

          This is another one that was suggested to me, and only clicked into place when I went back and read… It made a lot of sense.

          One thing I'm really enjoying about these books is that even if something *seems* obvious ("Sansa just had a stab in her belly – obviously she's getting her period," "Maester Luwin saw the boys' bodies up close. Obviously he'd notice that notBran's lets weren't atrophied," etc.), it never feels (to me, at least) as though GRRM was waving it around going, "Look! Clue! Plot point! See wut I did thar?!"

          • cait0716 says:

            Definitely agree. I think part of it is that there's just so much that you really have to pay attention to see all these little things. Otherwise they get lost in the noise.

            I really need to go back and re-read these after I finish the series. And brush up on some mythology (particularly King Arthur)

      • pica_scribit says:

        Seems unlikely. Theon is what? 20? And the boys were the same ages as Bran and Rickon. So unless he started banging the Miller's wife at 12….

        • cait0716 says:

          I actually wouldn't put that past him.

        • CynicalNymph says:

          This is true, but Rickon is only 4, so there's certainly wiggle room on the younger boy. And boys in the 7-10 range have a pretty widely varying rate of growth, size, etc. (Of course, that last is reaching a bit.)

          And like cait0716, I wouldn't put it past Theon. I mean, hey, if we have barely 13-year-old girls having sex (albeit in the context of arranged marriage) in this world, why not 12-year-old boys? They are growing up in this culture of prostitution and sex as currency, after all.

          • pica_scribit says:

            Isn't there a reference somewhere in the books to when Theon lost his virginity? But even so, he doesn't make it sounds like he and the miller's wife had more than a few encounters, so I'm going to go with the idea that there's only a vanishingly small chance that either of the kids shared DNA with Theon, and none at all unless it served the plot of the series somehow.

  8. Sarah Brand says:

    Sansa on the Iron Throne would be fantastic. It'd be a perfect complement to the beginning of her character arc, too… she started out wanting to be queen because of fairy tales and such, but if she actually got that wish, I have a feeling that in the end she'd be choosing it for the right reasons. MAKE THIS HAPPEN, GRRM.

  9. ShadowMarauder78 says:

    I want Stannis to win the throne, mostly because i picture him as Christopher Ecclestone. Arya is definitely my favorite character, but i'm getting a little worried at how easy she finds it to have people killed. And Theon Greyjoy, kindly die an extremely painful death you piece of shit.

  10. Maya says:

    Lyra and Arya would totally be BFFs.

  11. monkeybutter says:

    Rot13'ing Mark so I don't give anything away: V arire jnag gb ernq nobhg Gurba univat frk ntnva. Be univat na rerpgvba.

    QRNQ NAQ OHEVRQ. V xabj vg'f jebat gb ynhtu naq V ernyyl qb srry onq naq qvfthfgrq sbe Gurba/Errx, ohg ubyl wrohf, Znex, ubj qb lbh qb guvf?

    Okay, back to reading the rest of the review!

  12. drippingmercury says:

    AAAAAH Clash of Kings review and I can't comment much because I FINALLY GOT A JOB (!!!!) and have to go fill out paperwork instead of being a lazy bum on the internet.

    Soooo instead of using my words, I'll just leave this here because this image makes me lol FOREVER:
    <img src=""&gt;
    from, a wonderful blog full of GOT/HP crossover art.

    • knut_knut says:


      I can't decide if that picture is brilliant or terrifying, but I'm leaning more towards brilliant thanks to Snape

      • drippingmercury says:

        Thank you!

        And yeah, terrifying indeed. I'm worried this is what will pop into my head next time I reread Sorcerer's Stone… so naturally I had to make sure everyone else had the same horrifying mental image! 😀

  13. Noybusiness says:

    " I ACTUALLY THOUGHT THAT LYRA WOULD MAKE IT TO THE WALL! My thoughts are so precious, aren’t they?"

    Yes, they are. Lyra thinks so.

  14. SorrowsSolace says:

    All in spoiler cypher, had to talk about some things.

    V uvg zl ovt qvfvyyhfvbazrag jura V jnf ernqvat Fgbez bs Fjbeqf, lbh unq punenpgref whfg zvffvat rnpu bgure (Oena naq Wba), Neln naq Eboo naq Pngryla (V xabj vg jnf evtug orsber gurl jrer zheqrerq; srguvat Serlf') ohg fgvyy! Vg whfg sryg fubrubearq va gb unir gurz abg frr rnpu bgure rira sbe n zbzrag rfcrpvnyyl jura gurl jrer gung pybfr. LZZI gubhtu. V qb ybir Qnal'f tebjvat onqqnffrel, rfcrpvnyyl gur guerr oryyf va ure unve.

  15. SorrowsSolace says:

    Nyfb nabgure crg crrir vf gur pbafgnag fuvg guebja ba n srj punenpgref, Glevba naq Wba erfcrpgviryl. Glevba ybfrf uvf Unaq cbfvgvba, trgf fpneerq naq vg cyhzzrgf uvf nyernql ybj frys rfgrrz, trgf fghpx va n zneevntr jvgu Fnafn bs nyy crbcyr naq obgu bs gurz ner haunccl. Vf senzrq sbe zheqre, xvyyf Funr naq Gljva gura ehaf bs. JGS.
    Gura Wba, wbvaf gur jvyqvatf, snyyf va ybir, tbrf onpx gb gur Jngpu, svaqf uvf ybire qrnq naq frrzf oebxra juvyr yrnqvat gur jnyy ng gur fnzr gvzr naq arneyl nibvqvat orvat xvyyrq sbe orvat n genvgbe. V qvq ybir Fnz'f onqnffrel gubhtu.

    Fb lrnu, FbF qvq unir nybg bs tbbq cnegf, ohg V ernyyl sryg qenttrq qbja ol jung obgurerq zr, V'yy svavfu gur frevrf ohg arrq n oernx svefg.

  16. Julezme says:

    Here's my prediction … Three dragons; three riders, fighting the Others in the North: Daenerys, obviously. Somehow she meets up with Bran, fulfilling the "you will fly" prediction. And … it's not going to be Stannis, I don't think. Jon Snow?

    (It would please me if it were Samwise, uh, I mean Samwell, but that would be vastly out of character.)

    So who do you guys think will be riding those dragons when Daenerys *finally* gets around to crossing the Narrow Sea?

  17. monkeybutter says:

    Okay, now to talk about the rest of your review!

    Oh, Renly. I think he would have been the best king, too. I wish Ned had sided with him. ADWD spoilers: Ubjrire, vg qbrfa'g frrz yvxr Inelf naq Pb. jbhyq unir nyybjrq gung gb ynfg irel ybat, rvgure. V fhccbfr gung znxrf guvf obbx rira zber gentvp, orpnhfr rirelbar vf svtugvat bire n guebar gurl jbhyq arire or nyybjrq gb xrrc. Nyy gung qrfgehpgvba sbe abguvat.

    While I'm on the subject on Renly, I hate all of the fanboys who were outraged that he and Loras were shown as obviously gay in the show. I mean, what did you think they were doing during all of those late night prayer sessions? Come the fuck on. I wish one of them had had a POV before Renly's death, and that their relationship was shown more openly in the books, but like always when I'm unhappy about the things that GRRM does, the fandom manages to piss me off even more.

    Completely unrelatedly, yes, thank you for mentioning the treatment of sex workers and the nameless women who have sex with the male characters by choice or force. WOC in particular have less than ideal portrayals. I wish they were given a better voice in these books, and like you, I was disappointed with Shae's characterization in ACOK. I'm hoping the show does better by her.

    Sansa, Sansa, Sansa. Thank you for mentioning how awesome she is during the battle! Gubhtu, ubj nobhg gur tvey trgf n ybir vagrerfg jub vfa'g perrcl be greevslvat be hajnagrq? Cyrnfr? V'z orttvat lbh, TEEZ. She can keep her head and do what needs to be done. That's really admirable, especially from someone so young. Some people claim that she's useless or pathetic or any number of terrible things, but I have no idea what books they're reading. I love her. Though she and Arya might use different tactics, they're pretty similar in how they resist their enemies. Best characters in the books.

    Brienne is my spirit animal &lt;3

    • Karen says:

      While I'm on the subject on Renly, I hate all of the fanboys who were outraged that he and Loras were shown as obviously gay in the show. I mean, what did you think they were doing during all of those late night prayer sessions? Come the fuck on.

      The fanboys in this fandom are the literal worst. THE WORST. So much sexism and homophobia. Oh and there was some ~exciting~ racism over some casting news recently.

      • CynicalNymph says:

        A thousand times ditto.

        Yet *another* thing I love about these books so far – GRRM doesn't feel the need to beat you over the head with it… but there sure are enough clues to let you know what's up. Implications of Margery Tyrell never consummating the marriage with Renly were just the most obvious.

        • cait0716 says:

          Also Renly's Rainbow Guard. I laughed so hard at that bit.

          • CynicalNymph says:

            Trufax are true. That was not the most subtle of allusions. Flowers, rainbows, etc. There are definitely some troublesome tropes to be had in this series. Ah well, nothing's perfect. (Of course, for all the flowers and rainbows, Ser Loras is still one of the more talented fighters – at least so far.)

            • monkeybutter says:

              See, those allusions were just so ott and ridiculous that I was surprised anyone could be in denial about them. But I get distracted from shaking my head at GRRM for the rainbow guard when the fandom is being obstinate and heterosexist. And then there are the people who knew they were gay, but didn't want to see them being all icky and touchy-feely-blowjoby on their teevee screens. I'm sure these same people love the constant female nudity, and ungr Fnafn sbe orvat boyvivbhf. Ugh. Stop existing.

      • xpanasonicyouthx says:

        What was the casting thing? Is it a character I haven't met?

        • monkeybutter says:


          lol, I take it back. It's Xaro Xhoan Daxos, and he's in ACOK.

        • Karen says:

          It's the merchant guy that Dany lives with while she's in… that city whose name I can't remember. In the book he's described as being pale, but OMGZ THEY CAST A BLACK MAN. As if the color of his skin is in any way vital to his character. Give me a break, fandom.

        • CynicalNymph says:

          There was some pushback on the Dothraki look and casting, I read, but I'm not sure what it was. Avoiding the fandom (other than here) until I get through ADWD.

          Also, apparently people are complaining that they've cast a black actor as Xaro. I… was not under the impression that being pale was crucial to being Quartheen, but I dunno. Racism is fun! e_e

          • drippingmercury says:

            The pushback on the Dothraki was a combination of factors, I think it was mostly that they were several different races? And people didn't like that some of them were black.

            MY problem with the Dothraki casting was that the only women with their tits out and fucking in the wedding scene were the black women. The paler Dothraki women just got to stand back and be clothed. :/

            • FlameRaven says:

              That may have had more to do with the individual actors. I've been informed that when you sign on for a show like that you negotiate in your contract specifically how much nudity you are okay with (if at all). Maybe those actresses were the only ones who were okay with full-frontal nudity and the others were not? It really may not have had anything to do with race specifically.

      • monkeybutter says:



        • Karen says:

          There's a very good reason why I stick to the ONTD part of the ASOIAF fandom. Sure we might be silly, but at least we are not assholes.

          • knut_knut says:

            haha, so do I! I keep missing posts though 🙁

            • Karen says:

              If you have an lj account, you can track the tag! That's what I do. There's actually a post going on right now.

              • knut_knut says:

                I actually do have notifications set up but I still manage to miss them anyway, haha. A lot of the time they go on while I’m at work and I feel weird going on ONTD. Mark Reads/Watches I don’t mind but with ONTD there’s always a chance it’ll end up nsfw

    • doesntsparkle says:

      The Renly/Loras fan rage was just weird. Those people claimed to have read the books so many times and never picked up on that. It was written pretty subtly, but I picked up on it in the books.

  18. Albion19 says:

    V ungr uvz, V ungr uvf fgvaxvat snpr, naq V bayl jvfu greevoyr guvatf jbhyq unccra gb uvz.

    Bu Znex, vs V xabj lbh ng nyy lbh'er tbvat gb ybbx onpx ng guvf naq pevatr uneqpber.

    V xabj Gurba qvq fbzr njshy guvatf ohg V pna'g ungr uvz nsgre jung unccraf gb uvz. V whfg jnagrq uvz gb rfpncr naq or fnsr, gur cbbe fbq.

  19. Danielle says:

    A note on Shae. I'm pretty sure at this point Shae in the books is a different character than Shae in the TV series. Shae in the books serves as a focus on how messed up Tyrion's relationships are with women thanks to his dad (ie the whole only prostitutes will love him and its only because he pays them). In the tv series, the producers have said that while the first season was pretty close, they are going to be changing things up a bit for pacing (ie the convo with Jamie and Catelyn that was moved up). My prediction is that the Shae in the TV series may be a vehicle to introduce characters who show up much later in the books, earlier in the series.

  20. Julezyme says:

    So I found this really good map of Westeros (, but does anyone know of a good map of the rest of the SoIaF world? There is a world map on the Citadel site but it's not as good, I don't think. I'm not clear on the size of Westeros in relation to the other continents, or where exactly Valyria is located.

    I am also wondering if there are Others also in the Southern polar regions, or whether there is just not any land there for them to be on.

    I'd also be interested in more detail (from GRRM or fans) about the climate of this world. I would think that the years-long seasons would lead to a more stable, more imperial government – or else small but stable fiefdoms – in Westeros, and I am surprised not to hear more about food stockpiling. (Winter is Coming! Start Canning Fruit!) There's a war on, but there seems to have been a war on for most of the history of the place, and these people just do not have enough food infrastructure. Does this happen often? The winters are not so far apart as to be not remembered by adults, so I would think that more people would be freaking out about this than just the Starks and occasional other landed gentry. It is true that the Westerosi reach adulthood sooner than we do – in their teens – and these people would be excused from knowing the true cost of poor preparation for winter. But the Citadel at least ought to be keeping track of this and doing more than sending out white doves. But .. maybe they have secret stockpiles and/or particular trade agreements, e.g. with Braavos, and it's advantageous to them to be able to sell winter wheat to the lords for top dollar. (After all, what's a few dead peasants?)

    Also, presumably this would put a natural limit on the carrying capacity of Westeros in terms of its human population, as well as its other animal populations. But, the other continents don't seem to be so affected by the winters or by the creepy cold vampires. I'm surprised not to hear about more mass migrations, and what effect this would have on the stability of the kingdoms. Do the Others make it to the other countries? (Clearly Valyria had a big thing for dragons; were they also under threat?) Why is this winter particularly vampirific compared to winters in living memory???

    I'm also wondering, were the kingdoms of Westeros inclined to unite in order to force more beneficial trade agreements with the Southern cities during the years of food scarcity?

    I really love how thoroughly GRRM has built this world; I want to know more!

  21. monkeybutter says:

    Haha, Crystal Dragon Jesus is perfect for this series.

    AFFC spoilers: V qba'g xabj nobhg qebjavat, ohg V guvax rneyl oncgvfzf jrer fhozrefvbaf, evtug? Orpnhfr gurl jrer hfhnyyl qbar ba nqhygf. Naljnl, lrnu, V nyjnlf fnj gur qebjavatf nf oncgvfz be znlor zvxiruf. V'q fnl gur sbezre gubhtu, whfg orpnhfr vg'f fb fvzvyne gb gur vzntr V unir bs obea-ntnva oncgvfzf.

    Onfvpnyyl, V qba'g guvax gung qrngu vf gur bayl Znal-Snprq Tbq, unun.

  22. ShadowMarauder78 says:

    Theories Abound

    V’z pbaivaprq Wba Fabj vf abg npghnyyl Arq’f fba ohg uvf arcurj ol uvf fvfgre naq Eunrtre Gnetlrevba. Juvpu tvirf uvz n pynvz gb gur Veba Guebar nf jryy, naq zrnaf Qnal vf uvf nhag naq va gurbel ure Xvat. Fb jr zvtug npghnyyl frr Wba evqvat n Qentba!!

    • CynicalNymph says:

      Edited to rot13 this, in case Mark wants to work around to the theory on his own 😀

      Guvf vf zl gubhtug nf jryy!! Vs lbh tb onpx naq ernq znal cnffntrf va NTbG, cnegvphyneyl Arq'f gvzr va gur qhatrba naq fbzr bs Qnal'f gubhtugf rneyl ba, vg'f uneq gb zvff gung n) Ylnaan jnf jvyyshy naq fcvevgrq yvxr Neln, o) Eunrtne qvrq sbe gur jbzna ur ybirq naq vg'f cerggl pyrne ur jnfa'g gbb ranzberq bs uvf jvsr, p) Ylnaan'f oybbq bs orq naq ebfrf naq ure srire? Gung fbhaqf yvxr chrecreny srire gb zr, naq q) "Cebzvfr zr, Arq," gung… pbhyq or nalguvat, ohg jura fhttrfgrq, vfa'g vg rnfl gb ernq nf, "Cebzvfr zr lbh'yy envfr uvz nf lbhe bja?"

      (Gb or gbgnyyl ubarfg, fbzrbar ryfr cbvagrq guvf vqrn bhg gb zr, V qvqa'g cvpx hc ba vg ba zl bja.) Bs pbhefr, fvapr Arq vf tbar abj, ubj Wba jbhyq rire svaq bhg gur gehgu bs guvf vf orlbaq xabjvat…

      • @RaudhrGarm says:

        Ubjynaq Errq, naq znlor Orawra Fgnex.

        Nyfb, n onfgneq ur znl or, ohg ur'f n onfgneq jvgu ubabhe, naq ur'f abg yvxr gb nonaqba uvf…cbfg ng gur Jnyy, gb cebcreyl sbefnxr uvf ibjf? Ur'f fgvyy n Fgnex.
        Nyfb, gur xrl nobhg orvat n onfgneq vf orvat yrtvgnzvfrq ol gur Xvat. Fb, jub'q yrtvgnzvfr Wba whfg fb gung ur pbhyq hfhec uvz? Fgnaavf vf gur bayl bar jub zvtug qb gung, ohg gur jubyr guvat nobhg gur jnyy fgvyy erznvaf.

    • cait0716 says:

      I keep going back and forth about whether or not I agree with this theory. I definitely think it adds an interesting layer to the story and is more in keeping with what we know of Ned's character. But I don't know how it fits in with the fact that Jon has a Direwolf. Of course, Jon and Dany could very well be the titular Ice and Fire.

    • @RaudhrGarm says:

      1: Ebg13 qhqr. Nyjnlf.
      2: Znex unq nfxrq abg gb or gbyq nobhg guvf guvat va gur ynfg bar.
      3: V nterr ohg…
      4: Ur'f n onfgneq naq guhf qbrfa'g unir nal pynvz gb gur guebar cebcre.
      5: Ubj sne unir lbh ernq?

      • drippingmercury says:

        Ohg gurer'f cerprqrag sbe Gnetnelra onfgneqf vaurevgvat gur guebar – VVEP bar xvat yrtvgvzvmrq nyy uvf onfgneqf ba uvf qrnguorq juvpu fgnegrq gur jne xabja nf "Qnapr bs gur Qentbaf" jura uvf yrtvg urve naq gur onfgneqf nyy fgnegrq svtugvat sbe gur guebar, fb V qba'g guvax Wba'f bhg bs gur ehaavat. Be Traqel, sbe gung znggre.

      • ShadowMarauder78 says:

        I don't understand the need for rot13 it's only a theory not a spoiler.

    • LordMelvinBaelish says:

      Dude! Rot13!

      • cait0716 says:

        Rot13ing to be safe
        Ubj vf guvf n fcbvyre? V fnj guvf gurbel va erivrjf bs gur svefg frnfba bs gur gryrivfvba fubj. Naq gurer'f rivqrapr sbe vg rneyl va gur svefg obbx. Cyhf, nf sne nf V xabj, vg'f whfg n gurbel. Jul qbrf vg arrq gb or ebg13rq?

    • FlameRaven says:

      This is apparently such a widespread theory that the fandom refers to it as R+ L=J?

      However, with Jon on the wall and very few people (if any) alive to remember this secret, I'm not sure what good it does Jon.

      • ShadowMarauder78 says:

        That's the thing though, GRRM must be planning something with Jon's parentage otherwise why would who is mother is be such a big secret?

  23. knut_knut says:

    AHAHA I love Troll GRRM <3

  24. knut_knut says:

    Oh god so will I! So old T_T And GRRM will be in his 80s…what if he dies before he can finish the series??? D:

    I hope they bring back everyone who died (minus the people who deserved to die) for this massive dance party!

  25. knut_knut says:

    that line, all the tears :'(

  26. xpanasonicyouthx says:

    I'D LIKE MORE FOCUS ON SHAE, PLEASE. also, writers, please stop using women to give us character studies on the men around them. I want character studies of the women. THANKS.

    • pica_scribit says:

      This is often a problem in books by men. There are some wonderful books out there with frustratingly two-dimensional depictions of female characters. For example, I love Umberto Eco, but DAMN! Could he write a woman who does something? Maybe this is why I read a lot of YA lit. It tends to be a lot more even-handed on gender. Philip Pullman, J. K. Rowling, Tamora Pierce, Lemony Snicket, David Levithan, they all write some pretty kick-ass girls.

  27. Brin-Brew says:

    My favourite character in this one was the castellan of Storm's End, who refused to give in to Stannis, going so far as to ride out, ruthlessly insult Stannis and the various Lord's supporting him, then challenge them to single combat. It was sad that he ended up killed by such dishonourable means

  28. Karen says:

    CATEYN IS A GODDESS. IT IS OBJECTIVE FACT. Seriously though, I love her and haters don't know what they're missing. I'm actually writing about her for the weeklong We Love Women That Fandom Hates fest ( ). My first meta about her is here (… ), and there are only really spoilers for the first book except for an ADWD spoiler in the comments. However, in that same post I also post my metas for Rose Tyler from Doctor Who which contains spoilers for the first episode of Doctor Who as well as some supplementary materials that were published that gave more background for Rose's character and also my meta for Cordelia Chase from the Buffyverse which contains spoilers for Cordelia's character arc and her role in that universe, so be careful not to scroll past the Cat meta if you don't want to be spoiled for those fandoms.) But Cat is really wonderful in this book. I love her relationship with Brienne because it is one of the very few female friendships that we've seen. The story of many of the women in these books is about being a woman in a man's world and how they deal with that which is great and all, but I really miss women interacting with each other. Also, Cat's final chapter where she talks to Jaime in the dungeon is FLAWLESS.

    Oh and Brienne is another one of my favorite characters from this series. She's incredibly sweet and also naive. She has this idealized version of the world and what knighthood is and yeah. I LOVE HER. A LOT.

    I cannot get over how horrible things are for Sansa. She's still really just a kid. Also, I think that Sandor is a creeper who lack the emotional capability of dealing with his own feelings, so he takes it out in a weirdly aggressive way on this poor kid who has already spent months being traumatized by Joffrey. I DO NOT GET PEOPLE WHO SHIP THIS.

    I did a literal gasp when I thought that Bran and Rickon were dead. WHY YOU GOTTA PLAY ME LIKE THAT, GRRM? Guh. EVERYTHING IS THE LITERAL WORST FOR THE STARK FAMILY.

  29. Shannon says:

    A bunch of us discussed your list of predictions when it came out, and we were all really looking forward to your reaction to your own predictions, and I must say, it was JUST as entertaining as I thought it would be. I CANNOT WAIT for your reaction to ASOS.

    Also, one of my favorite parts of this is that you inadvertently made one really spot on prediction and you have NO IDEA.

    [WORDPRESS HASHCASH] The poster sent us ‘0 which is not a hashcash value.

  30. cait0716 says:

    I don't see much Christianity in the Old Gods that the Northmen pray to. That seems like a pretty good stand in for paganism, especially with the way it's dying out and being confined more in the north. I like/agree with all of your other analysis, though

  31. joanie says:

    Oh my god, a review is up!

    Haha, it was SO HARD not to convulse into laughter when I read your predictions! Oh, Mark. Maybe for ASoS they will consist of only sad things and no sunshine or rainbows.

    Ugh, I was totally with Renly’s camp & the shadow thing blew my mind! So pissed. The story of how Loras freaked out & killed 2 knights in his rage was devastating. I thought Renly had everything under control – so close to King’s Landing too. And that battle of Blackwater Rush, absolutely incredible. The budget’s going to be tricky to incorporate that, but they must!

    By the way, full points to how loyal some of Renly’s men were. Cortnay Penrose, one of my fav minor characters who die and never get heard from again, remained steadfast in holding Storm’s End. RIP. 🙁

    I was so upset with Theon’s chapters! Fully believed Bran and Rickon’s deaths, but the fact that people were murdered was awful enough. Just how faithful are the Winterfell folk to the Starks? My heart broke for everyone who died: Farlan, Mikken, Maester Luwin, Ser Rodrik Cassel, etc.

    Arya’s storyline was my absolute favourite. I loved her journey with Gendry and Hot Pie (RIP Lommy) & I sure hope she finds a way back soon. These Starks need to reunite, dammit! Her chapters with Jaqen were the most intriguing, I was very sad to see him go.

    Daenery’s chapters were one of my favs in book 1 but I wasn’t captivated at all aside from the prophecies. Talk about foreshadowing – grrm hammers out all these possible clues all at once!

    Anyhow, I can’t wait for your reviews on ASoS, or well, to laugh at your predictions first! SHIT GETS REAL. 😀

  32. @RaudhrGarm says:

    So, are we going to be getting a Mark Reads: CoK's visions? Because I would really like to read your thoughts on the numerous fucked up visions in the series.

  33. FlameRaven says:

    Lrrrnu, nf zhpu nf jr nyy jnag Gurba gb fhssre n ubeevoyr sngr, lbh trg gb Qnapr jvgu Qentbaf naq ner fhqqrayl yvxr UB FUVG GURBA V'Z FBEEL, LBH QB ABG QRFREIR GUVF. Yvxr, lrf, ur vf n ubeevoyr crefba, ur qvq njshy guvatf, ohg ab bar qrfreirf gung fuvg. Gur qrfpevcgvbaf bs ubj Enzfnl jbhyq fxva n svatre be gbr naq gura jnvg sbe vg gb ebg hagvy Gurba jnf orttvat sbe vg gb or phg bss…. htu, oeo fuhqqrevat sberire.

    Ubjrire, Enzfnl Obygba pna unir n ubeevoyr sngr naq V jvyy or 100% bxnl jvgu guvf. D:

  34. FlameRaven says:

    GRRM has said on his blog that a large part of the reason DWD took forever is that it was incredibly difficult to plot out the chronology of so many characters traveling across three continents and making sure they could all realistically meet up when they were supposed to meet up. He knew if he got it wrong, people would write in and complain, so he made sure to get it right. It just took forever. I believe him when he says books 6 and 7 should take much less time to come out (although that probably means 2-3 years between books) because things are finally starting to fall into place.

    • drippingmercury says:

      Also, he had originally planned for book 4 to pick up a few years after book 3 but later decided to write out the events of those years, so I think he probably had less of a plan/details already in mind for Feast & Dance than he did for other books (and hopefully the remaining books).

      Guvf nyfb rkcynvaf jul gubfr gjb obbxf ner yrff zvaq-zrygvat cybg gjvfgf naq zber… zbivat gur cvrprf vagb cbfvgvbaf naq jbeyq ohvyqvat glcr fghss.

  35. Patrick721 says:

    God, I read this years ago, and I barely remember anything that happened. Other than the sheer WTFery of it all, I mean.

  36. echinodermata says:

    Just popping in to remind and inform people that rot13 comments often get caught in the spam filter. Don't panic if your comment isn't showing up, it's just that a mod has to manually approve it and we're not informed when a comment is flagged as spam so it might be hours or days before anyone notices.

    I believe having some regular text in addition to the rot13 text decreases the chances of it being flagged, but that is by no means a guarantee.

    (As you were.)

  37. tethysdust says:

    I'm with you on Theon, Mark, I absolutely hate him. In general, I'm really not a fan of the entire Greyjoy family.

    I was so sad when I found out a lot of people in the fandom hate Catelyn and Sansa. Catelyn's hatred of Jon is annoying, but other than that, I love her character. She loves her family, and always tries to do what she thinks is right. And Sansa, sure she was really naive in GoT, but she was just a kid who happened to make her immature mistakes in an incredibly unforgiving environment. Maybe she'd be a good contender for the Iron Throne one day, but I think she still has a lot of growing up to do first. Honestly, I don't know who I'd say I want to take the Iron Throne at this point. Dany's a Targaryen, but she knows nothing of Westeros, the Lannisters are still awful (including Joffrey), and I'm not really in Stannis' camp. Maybe Robb?

    • feminerdist says:

      I agree. I also hate the entire Greyjoy family.

    • doesntsparkle says:

      I really like Cat, too. I think that most of the hate that she gets comes from the way that she treats Jon, which sucks, but it's pretty consistent with her station in life and the society the story is set in. Most Highborn Lords didn't keep their bastards around the house and raise them with their legitimate children. The fact that Ned rejected that bull is honorable to a modern audience, but in Westeros it's incredibly insulting to Cat. She couldn't really take it out on Ned, so she treats Jon like dirt. Not cool, but ng yrnfg vg'f orggre guna gur jnl Prefrv gerngf Eboreg'f onfgneqf.

    • birdbrainblue says:

      You're going to have a real love-hate relationship with Book Three, man. D:

  38. xpanasonicyouthx says:

    oooooooohhhhhhh. Perhaps I should stick those in my predictions post next week!!!

  39. pica_scribit says:

    #6 is … well, many of us know what it is, and you will, too, at some point. *snickers into her pillow*

    #15 I adore that Arya and Gendry are friends, because their daddies were BFFs, and it just seems so right. Also, nalbar ryfr urer ubyq jvgu gur gurbel gung Wndra U'tune naq Flevb Sbery ner gur fnzr zna? Wndra qvq pbzr sebz gur qhatrbaf bs Xvat'f Ynaqvat, nsgre nyy.

    Davos! I love him too much for words. I see Davos as sort of a replacement Ned in many ways. He's a man of integrity in a world of conniving bastards. It makes me adore him. And then I look at what happened to Ned.

    Brienne! She is indeed awesome, with her hopeless love for Renly (who, as we know from the miniseries, prefers pretty men to ugly girls). My personal theory by this point in the series was that Dany would eventually return victorious to Westeros and for a Queensguard of warrior women, including Brienne, Arya and Asha among others. Won't say whether or not there's any progress on me getting my wish or having it utterly destroyed, because your epic unpreparedness is just way too much fun, Mark.

    You are still not prepared and continue to be precious in your innocence in this review.

    • @RaudhrGarm says:

      It's also nice that it is a sort of reversal of roles, as the child of Ned isn't as stoic, while Robert's son is pretty calm and reasonable. You just know that Gendry isn't the type to go drink and boar hunt.

    • drippingmercury says:

      V qba'g guvax Wndra naq Flevb ner gur fnzr crefba – jul jbhyq Fre Genag unir yrsg uvz nyvir jura gurl jrer xvyyvat rirelbar ryfr Fgnex-nssvyvngrq? Naq jura Lbera jnf npdhvevat crbcyr sbe gur Avtug'f Jngpu ur jnf bssrerq gur qhatrbaf, juvpu V oryvrir vapyhqrq n zragvba bs gur guerr va gur oynpx pryyf. Fb hayrff Flevb farnxrq qbja vagb gur qhatrbaf, xvyyrq gur bevtvany Wndra naq gbbx uvf snpr nf cneg bs na vaperqvoyl pbaibyhgrq zrnaf bs yrnivat gur pvgl V qba'g guvax gurl'er gur fnzr zna.

  40. Clare says:

    Mark this entire review is beautiful. and I love that you love Sansa!

  41. doesntsparkle says:

    Vg'f npghnyyl xvaq bs nqbenoyr ubj znal bs gurfr cerqvpgvbaf pbzr gehr yngre ba va gur frevrf.

    For people who haven't read all five books out yet, the Tower of the Hand is a good site, you can set if for however far you have read and avoid spoilers.

  42. birdbrainblue says:

    Mark, A Storm of Swords is going to fucking BREAK you. You, specifically. I can find at least one thought you've expressed in this review that you're going to be yelling at yourself for later.

    I'm completely serious – nothing you have EVER read will hit you as hard as this book will. YOU ARE GOING TO EXPLODE.

  43. @unefeeverte says:

    Oh, gods. A Sorm of Swords, specifically part two – NEVER, EVER PREPARED. JSYK.

  44. Cass says:

    For some reason I was thinking that Jaqen didn't really show until the next book (I knew that he was with Yoren's group at the beginning, of course, but I was thinking that he vanished for the rest of the book after Arya tossed him the axe and then surprisingly showed up in the next… which was pretty silly of me, since it would have taken me two seconds to remember the truth if I'd focused on Arya's path through the series to work out when they were in Harrenhal together instead of just trying to remember when Jaqen came in). Anyway, the point of that rambling is FAVORITE MINOR CHARACTER. Favoriter than several of the major characters, even.

    I'm glad you liked Varys and Tyrion's interaction! I would seriously read a book that was nothing but the two of them being clever at each other and trying to keep the country from being run into the ground.

  45. takashid says:

    So, are you definitely not doing Storm of Swords as chapter by chapter reviews? i was wondering about that, because more then any book in the series i would love to read your reactions chapter by chapter.

  46. redletter_ says:

    I powered through this book in about two days and I think it broke my brain just a little bit. It feels like a spent the last two hundred pages curled up in a ball saying, "No nonononononn, NO! NOOOOO!" to myself as one disaster after another happend.

    These books are so fucking stressful, I CAN'T EVEN. People say that Storm of Swords is more intense than this, so I'm pretty sure these books are going to kill me.

    Also, I spent so long hoping that H'ghar would turn out to be Syrio but, LOL, NOPE. And there aren't enough words in the English language for me to describe how much I loathe Theon Fucking Greyjoy right now, go DIAF please.

    ONWARDS, to Storm of Swords!

  47. kajacana says:

    I'm about 200 pages into A Storm of Swords at this point and reading everyone's comments about how ETERNALLY AND FOREVER UNPREPARED the human race is/was for that book… I'm scared.

    But about A Clash of Kings:
    -I hated the Dany/House of the Undying chapter. Am I the only one? I thought it was weird and out of nowhere and didn't really accomplish anything except that she got those super-vague predictions. I think I would have liked it more if Dany had been less passive throughout the whole thing – I mean, she was wandering through this bizarre and horrifying place, and the whole time I felt like she never expressed anything beyond "Eh, okay," and maybe some mild distress.

    -I feel so, SO bad for Sansa. As much as her pettiness infuriated me in the first book, this one really made me stop and remember the fact that she is a CHILD. Seriously, holy crap. She's what – eleven, twelve years old (I think she's thirteen in the show) – and she finds herself completely alone, far from home, and betrothed to an awful teenage boy who physically, mentally, and emotionally torments her, not to mention having her father killed in front of her? And then the part where she wakes up and tries to burn her sheets because she has gotten her period and is so terror-stricken by the idea that now she will be forced to sleep with Joffrey? That poor girl!!! I love the way her character is developing, but I have never felt more pity for a character. Not even Arya, who I love, because at least Arya is a badass to begin with, and she's a little better at taking care of herself. Sansa has no one, and she's having to learn how to be self-sufficient and brave. That's pretty cool, but endlessly heartbreaking.

    • klmnumbers says:

      I think the House of the Undying chapter was weird as hell but necessary. It puts in motion connections to prophecies and backstory that we get piece by piece in the rest of the books. So, when you go back and read that cluster of insanity, it'll elucidate other parts of later books. I hope at least.

  48. Bartina says:

    I'm just gonna leave this here. (It's more for A Game of Thrones, but I think some of you might enjoy it.)

    [youtube v-Zdzj0MCSA&list=FLRp8yjF6CUUKlZS2eFlSYmg&index=1 youtube]

  49. I'm excited. Storm of Swords is my favorite ASoIaF book BY FAR. It will probably leave you a collapsed pile of sadness and man tears.

  50. Murray says:

    I have read all the books and the only thing I can say is that you can never be prepared for what is to come.

  51. AshleySnow says:

    Mark, reading this makes me soooo happy! I asked you on Tumblr if you could review the series, even if it was just as a whole and when you responded, by heart skipped! You take the words right out my mouth so perfectly. This is everything I thought of and MORE… and phrased 10 X better.
    Thank you!!

  52. Black Cloister says:

    How can you possibly be worried about side characters in this series not having agency? Nobody has any agency. There are characters with power, but that makes for less agency than anyone (aside from the smallfolk) because they spend all their time avoiding assassination by a load of factions with mutually exclusive aims. Particularly downtrodden side characters, like anybody vaguely in the path of Gregor Clegane, for instance, probably won’t show much agency.

    Can you tell these books depress the hell out of me?

    [WORDPRESS HASHCASH] The poster sent us ‘0 which is not a hashcash value.

  53. klmnumbers says:


    Like, I was legitimately spoiled for a majority of the plot points in the books you have yet to read, but I still had about 10 'OMG WHAAAAAAT' moments.

    I love your hatred of Theon. His introduction chapter was the most effective way to make me HATE SOME ONE SO MUCH IT HURTS. One chapter of his POV, and I wanted him to die or get castrated or something horrible.

    I LOVE THAT YOU LOVE SANSA OMG. I said this on your review for GoT, but it is SO NICE to see such positive opinions about her on the internet. There are large factions of people that hate Sansa, Cersei, and Catelyn. I have issues with Catelyn (hello, stop hating on my imaginary boyfriend, Jon Snow), but she is undeniably a fascinating and strong woman. Same with Cersei, honestly. I hate, hate, HATE HER SO MUCH sometimes, but she just wants to protect her creepy, evil children.

    And I love Sansa. Anyone who hates her clearly has no good reason.


  54. woot says:

    A lot of your issues, including character growth for women, are addressed in books 2+3.

    I won't say anything about Theon. I wouldn't dare…

  55. ninja_bat says:

    First, because I've never commented before: I love your reviews/readalongs. You are really good at conveying your love and excitement for the books you're reading (so much that you convinced me to try out Hunger Games.)

    Concerning ACOK: I have to bite my tongue, because I want to comment on so much… I'd love to see what you think once you've read everything else.

    As for Theon, this is by no way meant as a defense – my reaction to his chapters roughly mirrored yours – but he is very much in line with Ironborn culture's idea of women. They are… not that enlightened? I think you might say that. Asha is made of stern stuff for sure. (Love her, obviously.)

    Women, especially sex workers having no agency: it does make a certain amount of sense to me, given the setting, which is very close to medieval Europe, and GRRM generally showing this to be a crapsack world, which makes it roughly medieval Europe on crack. That said, I wish he had given more of a voice to people of the lower classes and prostitutes especially. (As much as many viewers of the show seem to be irritated by Ros, she and TV!Shae come as close to prostitute characters with an actual voice as you will probably get.)

    Melisandre: I found her a little disappointing, since she seems so very much like an evil sorceress AD&D NPC. She will be shown to be more complex than that, but still, not GRRM's most successful character in my mind.

    Stannis: Poor Stannis, if only there was someone translating human behaviour for him.

    Renly: Waah. ;_; I dread this on the show, seriously, since I actually prefer the TV version.

    Brienne – adore her. She's awesome. She'll get even awesomer.

    Gendry – love him and his friendship with Arya, but, since you've seen the show, why did you think he'd never show up again?

    love that you love Sansa! 😀

  56. Hotaru_hime says:

    My thoughts concerning ACOK? Die in all the fires, Theon Greyjoy. In fact, take your entire family (with the exception of the delightful Asha) along with you, you disgusting pack of human beings.

  57. Majc says:

    I read how to a while ago, but didn't pay attention! How do I translate the coded text?!

Comments are closed.