In The Two Towers, I don’t know what happens and I am certain I am going to embarrass myself. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to make predictions about The Lord of the Rings.
You know, this list took much longer than I anticipated, and that’s all Tolkien’s fault. Nearly everything I thought mightÂ have happened has occurred. I genuinely do not understand how there are hundreds upon hundreds of pages left. What’s left to be resolved? That’s not a criticism, for the record. For once, I don’t even have a grasp on the scope of this story, and now I’m supposed to predictÂ it? I AM ONLY MADE OF BAD DECISIONS. So let’s get down to this. I know it may seem obvious to you, but I always have to remind folks of this: Do not answer any of my questions and do not hint at the validity of any of my predictions. This is just to publicly show y’all how unprepared I am.
Mark’s Prediction for The Two Towers
- Okay, this isn’t really a prediction, but I need you to know that I’m positive I’ve referred to this book as The Dark TowerÂ at least ten times in the last month, and no one corrected me. Either they were so concerned about spoiling me that they didn’t want to tell me the correct title, or they think I’m a goddamned fool.
- All right, let’s get to it. Sam and Frodo will get sidetracked and won’t make it to Mordor in this book at all.
- The Company will be reunited by the end of the book.
- This book will end on a cliffhanger.
- Arwen will make an appearance.
- We will learn that someone in the Shire has died since the hobbits left.
- Boromir will have a change of heart regarding the Ring, but not until afterÂ the other part of the Company gets to Minas Tirith.
- We will find out exactly whatÂ that Eye thing is.
- Gollum will speak to one of the characters.
- We will see at least twoÂ new creatures/beasts/monsters.
- We will find out what these two towers are? Is it the tower in Mordor and the one in Minas Tirith? GOD WHY AM I EVEN ASKING QUESTIONS.
- One talking pony. JUST ONE, PLEASE.
- Ugh, I hate even typing this. I think one of the hobbits will die. Probably Pippin. ASD;KLFJSALKF;JSDFJK
- I am unprepared.
- I have no idea what I’m doing anymore.
So, Monday! I’ll see y’all then. OH GOD.