Mark Reads ‘The Two Towers’: Chapter 4

In the fourth chapter of The Two Towers, we meet Treebeard. All is right with the world. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to read The Lord of the Rings.

CHAPTER FOUR: TREEBEARD

THIS IS THE BEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED IN MY LIFE. HOW HAVE I SURVIVED A SINGLE MOMENT WITHOUT KNOWING TREEBIRD WAS A FICTIONAL CHARACTER THAT EXISTED? HOW HAVE I LIVED A FRUITFUL, SATISFYING EXISTENCE WITHOUT ENTS OR ENTWIVES OR ENTMAIDENS IN MY BRAIN? I HAVE NOT. MY LIFE UP UNTIL THIS MOMENT HAS BEEN POINTLESS. I HAVE DONE NOTHING BUT SWIM IN NIHILISTIC FUTILITY UNTIL TREEBEARD.

They found they were looking at a most extraordinary face. It belonged to a large Man-like, almost Troll-like, figure, at least fourteen foot high, very sturdy, with a tall head, and hardly any neck.

SO IT’S HENRY ROLLINS? SORRY I HAD TO.

Whether it was clad in stuff like green and grey bark, or whether that was its hide, was difficult to say. At any rate the arms, at a short distance from the trunk, were not wrinkled, but covered with a brown smooth skin.

THERE ARE LIVING TREES IN MIDDLE-EARTH. LIFE HAS MEANING AGAIN.

The large feet had seven toes each.

FIVE TOES IS NOT ENOUGH FOR THE ENTS. YOUR FIVE-TOED FEET ARE PEDESTRIAN TO THEM. THEY HAVE SEVEN TOES ON EACH FOOT AND THAT MEANS THEY ARE BETTER THAN ALL OF US.

THIS ENT IS NAMED TREEBEARD. IT IS ALSO KNOWN AS FANGORN. IT IS ALSO KNOWN AS OUR TRUE LORD AND SAVIOR. JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW THAT.

ALSO, THE ENTS HAVE A SONG THAT IS A LIST OF EVERY LIVING CREATURE IN MIDDLE-EARTH. YOU KNOW WHAT’S CUTER THAN THAT? TREEBEARD LEARNING ABOUT THE HOBBITS AND THEN LATER GETTING PERMISSION TO ADD A LINE ABOUT THE HOBBITS INTO THE LIST. THIS IS THE EQUIVALENT TO AN AVALANCHE OF PUPPIES. YES, IT’S EXACTLY THE SAME AS THIS. JUST IMAGINE YOU’RE LAYING ON YOUR BED AND ALL OF A SUDDEN A BUNCH OF PUPPIES COME TUMBLING FROM THE CEILING AND THEY ALL START WAGGING THEIR TAILS AND YIPPING AND YOU CAN BARELY BREATHE, BUT YOU DON’T CARE BECAUSE IT’S AN AVALANCHE OF PUPPIES, SO YOU JUST SUBMIT TO THEIR OPPRESSIVE CUTENESS. THAT’S WHAT JUST HAPPENED WHEN I READ THIS CHAPTER.

‘Real names tell you the story of the things they belong to in my language, in the Old Entish as you might say. It is a lovely language, but it takes a very long time to say anything in it, because we do not say anything in it, unless it is worth taking a long time to say, and to listen to.’

THAT’S RIGHT. NOT ONLY IS TREEBEARD DROPPING SOME KNOWLEDGE ON US ALL, BUT WE FIND OUT TOLKIEN INVENTED ANOTHER LANGUAGE FOR THIS BOOK, AND IT’S UNLIKE ANYTHING EVER, AND EVEN ENTISH CULTURE MEANS COMMUNICATING IS DISSIMILAR FROM WHAT EVERYONE ELSE DOES WHEN THEY SPEAK.

‘And did you know Gandalf?’

‘Yes, I do know him: the only wizard that really cares about trees,’ said Treebeard.

SERIOUSLY, WAY TO MAKE ME FEEL JOYOUS AND HEARTBROKEN AT THE EXACT SAME TIME. OH GANDALF, I SERIOUSLY MISS YOU AND YOUR SASSY WIZARD ADVICE. WHY CAN’T YOU JUST MAGICALLY COME BACK WITH AFTERLIFE MAGIC? DAMN IT, THAT’S NOT HOW THIS WORKS, BUT WHATEVER. I SUPPOSE I HAVE YET ANOTHER ANGRY LETTER TO WRITE TO TOLKIEN. DAMN IT, I SHOULD REALLY GET ON THOSE.

At once he set off with long deliberate strides through the trees, deeper and deeper into the wood, never far from the stream, climbing steadily up towards the slopes of the mountains.

HE CAN FUCKING WALK. THERE ARE WALKING TREES IN MIDDLE-EARTH. JUST BURY ME HERE ON THIS PAGE. THIS IS THE END. I CANNOT DEAL WITH HOW AMAZING AND CUTE THIS IS. I JUST LOVE HOW WELL-DEVELOPED AND COMPLETE ENTISH CULTURE IS, HOW UNLIKE HUMANITY IT IS, AND HOW MUCH IT’S EXACTLY THE SAME. THIS IS SOME OF THE MOST BRILLIANT AND IMMERSIVE WORLD-BUILDING I HAVE EVER COME ACROSS IN LITERATURE.

As the old Ent approached, the trees lifted up their branches, and all their leaves quivered and rustled. For they were evergreen trees, and their leaves were dark and polished, and gleamed in the twilight.

THE ENTS USE TREES AS GATES. BLESS THEM. BLESS THEM FOREVER.

PS: TREEBEARD HAS HIS OWN HOUSE. JUST…I CAN’T.

PPS: ENTS MEASURE DISTANCE IN ENT-STRIDES. THEY HAVE THEIR OWN SYSTEM OF MEASUREMENT. THIS IS ALL JUST A CONSTANT REMINDER THAT MY IMAGINATION WILL FOREVER PALE IN COMPARISON TO J.R.R. TOLKIEN’S. MY GOD.

PPPS: ENTS DOWN OWN CHAIRS

PPPPS: ENTS OWN BEDS THOUGH. ENTS CAN SLEEP IN BEDS. THERE IS A GOD, AND GOD IS TREEBEARD.

I ALSO THINK IT IS A TESTAMENT TO HOW COMPLETE AND ENGROSSING THIS WORLD IS THAT I BECAME INCREDIBLY SAD THAT THE ENTWIVES HAVE EITHER DISAPPEARED OR BEEN KILLED OFF. I HAVE KNOWN THAT ENTS HAVE EXISTED FOR MAYBE FORTY-FIVE MINUTES, AND I’M ALREADY DEDICATING MY LIFE TO THEM. THIS IS WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME. WHAT HAS THIS BOOK DONE TO MY LIFE. WHAT IS MY LIFE. WHAT ARE MY CHOICES.

OH GOD, HOW CLEVER AND FANTASTIC IS IT THAT THERE IS ACTUALLY INFO-DUMPING DISGUISED AS DIALOGUE HERE? LIKE, I WAS SO FASCINATED BY TREEBEARD THAT I COMPLETELY DIDN’T NOTICE THAT HE WAS GIVING ME CRUCIAL INFORMATION ON HOW SARUMAN CAME TO BE, HOW HE FIGURED OUT THE WIZARD HAD BEEN ON A PURSUIT FOR POWER FOR A VERY LONG TIME.

ALSO, THE FACT THAT I’VE LIVED ON THIS PLANET FOR OVER TWENTY-EIGHT YEARS AND NOT HAD A SLUMBER PARTY WITH AN ENT IS PURE TRAGEDY. I’LL JUST ADD IT TO MY LIST OF THINGS THAT ARE OPPRESSIVE TO MY VERY BEING, WHICH INCLUDES:

1) NO LETTER FOR HOGWARTS

2) NO TARDIS

3) I CAN’T BEND THE ELEMENTS

4) I’M NOT TEXT MESSAGE BUDDIES WITH DANA SCULLY, AMY POEHLER, OR MICHELLE OBAMA.

5) I DON’T OWN A COAT LIKE HAGRID’S

THESE ARE REAL OPPRESSIONS THAT WE MUST FIGHT AGAINST, FYI.

THE NAMES OF THE OTHER GREAT ENTS ARE LEAFLOCK AND SKINBARK. IT’S OKAY FOR YOU TO ADMIT THAT MY OWN NAME PALES IN COMPARISON TO THEIRS. YOU WOULD JUST BE TREATING ME WITH HONEST AND RESPECT AND I WOULD NOT BE MAD AT ALL. YOU WOULD ALSO BE CORRECT IN SAYING THAT SINCE I HAVE NEVER BEEN TO AN ENTMOOT, MY LIFE IS MEANINGLESS AND UNFORTUNATE. NOTHING ABOUT THAT WOULD BE INCORRECT.

CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT THE ENTMOOT. IF THIS IS NOT IN THE TWO TOWERS FILM, I WILL WRITE PETER JACKSON AN ANGRY LETTER. I NEED TO SEE THIS. I NEED TO SEE SO MANY VARIED ENTS IN ONE PLACE, WHISPERING AND MUTTERING IN THE GORGEOUS LANGUAGE, TAKING AN HOUR JUST TO SAY HELLO TO ONE ANOTHER.

‘I wonder what the Entish is for yes or no,’ he thought. He yawned.

PIPPIN, YOU ARE JUST WONDERFUL. LET ME LOVE YOU.

REALLY, THOUGH, TREEBEARD DESERVES ALL OF MY LOVE. I CAN ALREADY TELL HOW THOUGHTFUL HE IS WHEN HE BECOMES CONCERNED IF THE HOBBITS ARE BORED. HE IS SO WORRIED THAT HIS NEW FRIENDS AREN’T INTERESTED BY THE CONVERSATION THEY CAN’T UNDERSTAND, SO HE SENDS THEM OFF TO HANG OUT WITH ANOTHER ENT, BREGALAD. LOOK, I JUST HAVE THIS MENTAL IMAGE THAT BREGALAD IS LIKE A CHILD ENT, WALKING AND LEAPING ABOUT THE FOREST, LAUGHING AT EVERY LITTLE THING THAT MOVES. HE IS SO HOPEFUL AND JOYOUS, AND AFTER THE CONSTANT SHITSTORM MERRY AND PIPPIN HAVE BEEN THROUGH, IT IS SO REFRESHING TO HAVE THEM JUST ENJOY WALKING AROUND WITH A LIVING TREE. ALSO IT IS A LIVING TREE THAT LAUGHS. NOTHING ABOUT THAT IS TERRIBLE. I LOVE THIS BOOK SO MUCH.

ALSO, CAN WE DISCUSS HOW THE COUNCIL OF THE ENTS TAKES THREE DAYS? I APOLOGIZE FOR SAYING THE COUNCIL OF ELROND IS LONG. CLEARLY I HAD NO IDEA WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT. HOWEVER, I WOULD TOTALLY WAIT AROUND FOR THREE DAYS IF I GOT TO HANG OUT WITH ENTS, SO THIS IS NOT A COMPLAINT. IT’S PRETTY VICTORIOUS THAT THE ENTS HAVE DECIDED TO HEAD TO ISENGARD TO FIGHT AGAINST THE DARK LORD. I SUPPOSE THAT THIS CHAPTER ENDS ON A SOMBER NOTE, BUT I’M OKAY WITH THAT. IT’S SUCH A GLORIOUS MOMENT TO HAVE THE ENTS TAKE A LARGER PART IN THE STORY, AND I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE HOW THIS PANS OUT.

TREEBEARD FOR 2012 REPUBLICAN NOMINATION, FOR THE RECORD. HE IS THE ONLY ENT THAT CAN BRING US TO THE PROMISED LAND.

About Mark Oshiro

Perpetually unprepared since '09.
This entry was posted in The Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

556 Responses to Mark Reads ‘The Two Towers’: Chapter 4

  1. "Ent" and Its Variations
    Ent
    Entish
    Entwash
    ent-house
    Entwives
    Entings
    Entmaidens
    Entmoot
    ent-strides
    Ent-voices

    Number of times "Ent" and its variations occur: 129
    Number of pages: 32
    Ents/page: 4.03

    Good Ent-morning. I Ent-typed this on my Ent-laptop. Ent.

    • msw188 says:

      What a beautiful calculation. What liberal artist claims that mathematics cannot be beautiful?

      • Tauriel_ says:

        WHAT. :@

        As a former Maths and Physics student, I STRONGLY OPPOSE the sentiment that maths can't be beautiful. On the contrary – Mathematics, when done properly, IS beautiful. Its inner system, how everything fits, is pure beauty.

        • MsPrufrock says:

          Additionally, math is the foundation of pretty much everything musical– and who would argue that music's not beautiful? It's all fractions and frequencies and whatnot.

          • Tauriel_ says:

            Also, as xkcd wisely observed, Mathematics is the basis of everything:

            <img src="http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/purity.png"&gt;
            (Mouseover text: "On the other hand, physicists like to say physics is to math as sex is to masturbation." Which is not without a point… 😀 )

            • flootzavut says:

              haha Sheldon would love that 😀

            • msw188 says:

              Hahaha, I forgot that I even posted about this! Yes, I'm a mathematician too. In fact I'm just getting back into it after a fairly long time away.

              I've got an absolutely fabulous book about what it means to do pure mathematics, and the kinds of thought processes involved. It really makes the artistry of mathematics clear, both in the process and in the final product. "If we can see this idea clearly, without effort, anticipating what it implies, we may notice that there is a real work of art before us." (this is in reference to Jean Bernoulli's original discovery of the Brachistochrone) The book is "Mathematics and Plausible Reasoning (G. Polya)", and I STRONGLY recommend it to anyone who pursued (and enjoyed) mathematics courses beyond the sophomore level in college.

      • Milla says:

        Math is a universal language! It's logical and when it makes sense the world comes together and there is beatuy and peace and also butterflies.

      • rabidsamfan says:

        Er… if google is to be believed, no one has actually been quoted claiming that. There's a lot of hits for "who said mathematics can't be beautiful" but nothing for any variant of "math can't be beautiful" by itself without the rhetorical question except one lonely forum of people debating the possibility, none of whom were famous enough to be quoted anywhere else on the 'net.

        • msw188 says:

          Haha, it was a joke honestly. I mean, my question was just a rhetorical one aimed at being goofy, that's all. And hey, it led to a bit of math talk, so it was worth it!

    • TheFormerAstronomer says:

      There ent any ents in my life. It ent fair 🙁

      • flootzavut says:

        It's only just occurred to me to realise and laugh at the fact that Mark had ent on his banner during HDM 🙂

        There are no ents in my life either 🙁

    • settledforhistory says:

      I love the number of Ent-words. So Ents are like Middle-earth smurfs?

    • Jordan says:

      You 'ent prepared!

  2. Tauriel_ says:

    Here are a few renderings of Treebeard:

    Treebeard by Alan Lee
    <img src="http://img-fan.theonering.net/~rolozo/images/lee/lee21.jpg&quot; width="600">

    Treebeard by John Howe
    <img src="http://img-fan.theonering.net/~rolozo/images/howe/treebeard.jpg&quot; width="800">

    Wellinghall by Ted Nasmith
    <img src="http://img-fan.theonering.net/~rolozo/images/nasmith/welling.jpg"&gt;

    Wellinghall by the brothers Hildebrandt
    <img src="http://img-fan.theonering.net/~rolozo/images/hildebrandt/treebeard.jpg&quot; width="800">

    • cait0716 says:

      I love all of these

    • Fiona says:

      My love for Alan Lee and John Howe knows no bounds. It's a mark of how many times I've watched the special features on the DVDs of the films that I was almost as excited about seeing them in The Hobbit vlogs as I was about seeing Martin Freeman in costume :). They just seem like wonderful people and their art is particularly gorgeous.

      • flootzavut says:

        ^ This.

        I love John Howe's enthusiasm with armour and things, and how much he looks like a cross between Gandalf and an Ent.

        And Alan Lee always comes across as such a lovely, humble man, softly spoken and gentle, but with a distinct twinkle and a sense of humour.

        And they both seem genuinely excited to be a part of it all and not being superior about their drawing abilities or their knowledge and prominence within the world of Tolkien art, they just got down there and got stuck in and enjoyed the collaboration.

        There have been so many awesome people involved in the Tolkien movies <3

        • AmandaNekesa says:

          THIS SO MUCH!

        • arctic_hare says:

          THIS THIS THIS. I was so giddy about seeing them in the vlogs for all these reasons. <3

        • Tauriel_ says:

          I'll third the "THIS" to this post. 🙂 They're both awesome, and very humble, despite being such well-known and awesome artists.

        • stefb4 says:

          It's funny how PJ tried to get in touch with Alan Lee to persuade him to be a conceptual artist—apparently he lived in relative isolation! I think they mentioned he didn't have a phone…?

          • flootzavut says:

            yes… he's out on on the moors I believe… having been there… yeah it's pretty remote… not quite the highlands of Scotland but along those lines!

    • threerings13 says:

      I really love that John Howe Illustration. It's totally my image of Treebeard. Naq V yvxr vg orggre guna Gerrorneq sebz gur zbivrf, jub ybbxf gbb zhpu yvxr na npghny gerr sbe zr.

    • knut_knut says:

      John Howe's Treebeard kind of looks like himself 😀

    • fantasy_fan says:

      Some how I don't like any of them. I could never visualize Treebeard until the movies, but he never looked like this. Especially the last one – more like Cousin It with eyes than treebeard to me. Howe's I guess is the best, probably because you don't see most of him.

    • notemily says:

      I like Alan Lee's best I think. The last one is way too silly.

      • flootzavut says:

        Having looked through them several times, I too like Alan Lee's the best – not least because there's a wistful, sad look on his face that really feels right for the characterisation.

  3. Jenny_M says:

    I KNEW YOU WOULD LOVE TREEBEARD AND I WAS SO HOPING FOR A CAPS LOCK REVIEW.

    HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE TREEBEARD? HE IS THE TOTAL BEST. FUCK YEAH, ENTS!!!!

  4. Becky_J_ says:

    HOLY ENTS, BATMAN!!!

    OH, the Ents. What can you say about the Ents? They are longwinded, they are big, and DUDE THEY ARE PRETTY MUCH TREES, made smart by the Elves. The elves WOULD want to talk to the trees. Actually, so would I, now that I think about it….. Awesomeeeeeeeeee. I love the Ents. So much. Even though I would probably get SO ANNOYED by them if I ever had to have a talk with them. They remind me of the centaurs from Harry Potter a lot…. You ask them where the nearest toilet is, and they tell you that the grass is awfully green today.

    ~"The effect of the draught began at their toes, and rose steadily through every limb, bringing refreshment and vigour as it coursed upwards, right to the tips of the hair."
    Okay, seriously, you guys, THERE ARE SO MANY REVIVING LIQUIDS IN MIDDLE EARTH. Why in the world can't they share with us?????? I could really use this drink….well…ALWAYS.

    ~"You see, we lost the Entwives."
    DUDE. THAT IS THE WORST WAY TO KEEP YOUR SPECIES ALIVE I HAVE EVER SEEN. How do you even LOSE wives?? Were they playing hide and seek with you and just ran off to some other forest while you weren't looking? Like…. you would think that the Ents would keep at least a little bit of an eye on them, yeah? From the story Treebeard tells, they just kinda wandered away until they were gone. PROBABLY A POOR CHOICE.

    ~"Merry and Pippin climbed on to the bed and curled up in the soft grass and fern."
    Look, I just start picturing Merry and Pippin curled up together, cuddling in the forest, and IT IS MY FAVORITE BROMANCE EVER. Whew. Those pictures of them from yesterday must be muddling my brain…. in the best possible way

    ~"…Pippin had tried to keep count of the 'Ent-strides' but had failed, getting lost at about three thousand…."
    Okay. Let's just talk about this. Am I the only child in the world that used to try to count forever?? I used to do it during school, in the car, and mostly in bed. THE HIGHEST I EVER MADE IT WAS FIVE HUNDRED AND SIXTY ONE. And that was sooooo hard. THREE THOUSAND?? I don't think so

    ~How in the name of Treebeard's…. well, BEARD….. does Merry know all this stuff about Isengard?? Seriously, it's like he has been magically bestowed with knowledge!!

    ~"I am Bregalad, that is Quickbeam in your language. But it is only a nickname, of course. they have called me that ever since I said yes to an elder Ent before he had finished his question."
    I'm sorry, I don't know why, but this is THE FUNNIEST THING IN THE WORLD to me. I giggled for probably five minutes picturing it. what is wrong with me

    ~"He reached down two shapely arms and gave a long-fingered hand to each of the hobbits. all that day they walked about, in the woods with him, singing, and laughing."
    Okay, you guys. Here's the picture in my head…. Merry and Pippin, holding hands with a tree, all of them skipping merrily about, singing and laughing AS IF NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS WRONG. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for them, but I suspect Frodo and Sam would be a little bitter knowing that Merry and Pippin are just frolicking around the woods with a tree-man…..

    ~The story about the Rowan trees? SO FREAKING SAD. Poor Bregalad 🙁

    ~"To Isengard with doom we come! With doom we come, with doom we come!"
    SHOULDN'T'A FUCKED WITH THE ENTS SAURUMAN. now you're in for it

    • Atrus says:

      IIRC Merry studied maps and lore while in Rivendell. He's a smart Hobbit. 🙂

      • Dreamflower says:

        Yep. In fact, that's what he said to Pippin in the previous chapter. I can just imagine in Rivendell, Merry poring over the maps, making plans…

        My idea of Merry is someone who packs for a trip a week ahead of time, who makes to-do lists and carefully prioritizes them, and who gets flustered when his perfectly planned plans don't work like he thought they would. And he's just a little obsessive– after all, he'd been stalking his cousin Frodo for seventeen years, looking for signs that he'd run off into the Wild like Bilbo did.

    • flootzavut says:

      Not having Ent draft or Miruvor is a serious tragedy of my life.

    • flootzavut says:

      Npghnyyl, V qba'g guvax vg'f va Fnz'f angher gb or ovggre… ur zvtug or n yvggyr raivbhf, nyvggyr jvfgshy, ohg ovggre? Ab!

    • msw188 says:

      YES YES YES to your funniest thing in the world comment.

    • AmandaNekesa says:

      Those pictures of them from yesterday must be muddling my brain…. in the best possible way

      Haha…I can't deny this made me smile just a bit….

      Okay, you guys. Here's the picture in my head…. Merry and Pippin, holding hands with a tree, all of them skipping merrily about, singing and laughing AS IF NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS WRONG.

      This is a glorious image to have in your head! And now I'm imagining it too, with Merry and Pippin frolicking along with the Ents, while Frodo and Sam (somehow) see them and shake their heads disapprovingly while secretly wishing they were doing the same. What are you doing to my brain?

    • Katarina says:

      I haven't tried to count forever, but I have one sung 250 verses of "En elefant balanserade" ("One perched elephant", sort of a Swedish version of 100 bottles of beer). I was a very bored kid waiting for my supper, and dad figured that as long as it kept me occupied…

      On topic:

      1. There is a rumour that the 13-ep Swedish LotR radio play was supposed to be 12 eps, but Treebeard… spoke… so…very…slowly…

      2. From the list of things one isn't allowed to do during LotR: when the Ents march towards Isengard, one isn't allowed to shout "RUN, FOREST! RUN!"

    • flootzavut says:

      And oh yeah, I used to count forever, or try to. To this day I still automatically count things, I have to intentionall stop myself…

    • Fiona says:

      The Ent draught is one of my favourite details of Middle Earth. Why can't that and Lembas actually exist? I would get so much more work done and I'd be about a foot taller :).

      • Geolojazz says:

        I did some googling, and the most interesting recipe I found is this:

        kiwi juice
        honeydew juice
        lime juice
        several shots rum
        several shots gin
        several shots vodka

        What to do: Mix all ingredients in a punch bowl. Drink.

        Fbzrubj V qba’g guvax guvf jvyy znxr lbh trg gnyyre. Ybbxf thnenagrrq gb trg lbh qehax, gubhtu…

    • Noybusiness says:

      He didn't say the Elves made them smart, he said they taught them how to talk, right?

      • @redbeardjim says:

        Yes, "cured them of dumbness" was the specific phrase used. Tolkien's very precise with his words. 🙂

        • Nathan L says:

          Just goes to show how the muddling of the meaning of a word since can totally change the point Tolkien is trying to get across, too.

          He's saying the trees were always smart, they just couldn't speak English 🙂

          • Noybusiness says:

            Naq vs lbh ernq gur Fvyznevyyvba, ragf jrer qvssrerag sebz gerrf gb ortva jvgu (juvpu gur ryirf erpbtavmrq, urapr obgurevat gb grnpu gurz ynathntr).

            • Nathan L says:

              V ernq gur fvyznevyyvba ntrf ntb ohg V pna'g erzrzore nalguvat ohg gur irel inthrfg ovt cvpgher qrgnvyf orpnhfr gurer'f whfg fbbb zhpu fghss va gurer

          • anobium says:

            They still can't speak English. This is all being translated from ancient-Middle-Earth-language. 😉

    • notemily says:

      They remind me of the centaurs from Harry Potter a lot…. You ask them where the nearest toilet is, and they tell you that the grass is awfully green today.

      THIS IS 100% TRUFAX

      And you're right. Quickbeam's story of how he got his nickname IS the funniest thing in the world.

  5. Tauriel_ says:

    Tauriel's Linguistic Corner

    Whooo, plenty of Elvish in this chapter! And some Entish, too! 🙂 The old Entish seems to be derived from ancient Elvish – Treebeard uses many words that seem to be compounds of Quenya or Sindarin words. Which is pretty logical, since, as Treebeard said, the Elves began to teach the Ents speak, so it's natural that they'd teach them their own language.

    Here is a very nice article about Entish on Ardalambion (Spoiler note: it does contain a few references and lines from ROTK and the Appendices, so proceed with caution)

    I'll start with names:

    Fangorn – "Treebeard". 😀 Yep, he's named after his forest – or his forest is named after him, take your pick. Sindarin origin: fang – beard; orn – tree.
    burárum – Entish word meaning "Orcs"
    Laurelindórenan – "Valley of the Land of Singing Gold". Quenya origin: laurë – gold (as in colour or light, not metal); lin or lind- – "a musical sound" (from this is derived lindë – "tune", "song", "singing"); -ndor – element in compounds meaning "land"; nan or nand- or nandë – "valley", "vale".
    Tasarinan, Nan-Tasarion – "Willow-valley", "Vale of Willows". Quenya origin: nan – "valley", "vale"; tasar or tasarë – "willow".
    Neldoreth, Taur-na-neldor – "Beech forest". Sindarin origin: neldor – "beech"; na – "of"; taur – "(great) wood", "forest" (also, my nickname is derived from this… 🙂 )
    Dorthonion – "Land of Pine-trees". Sindarin origin: dôr – "land"; thôn – "pine-tree", from which is derived thonion – "having pine-trees".
    Orod-na-Thôn – "Mountain of Pine-trees". Sindarin origin: orod – "mountain"; na – "of"; thôn – "pine-tree".
    Ambaróna – "Eastern land". Quenya place name, derived from Ambarónë – "uprising", "sunrise", "Orient".
    Tauremorna – "Black forest". Quenya origin: taurë – "(great) wood, forest"; morna – "black", "dark".
    Aldalómë – "Tree-night" or "Tree-shade-night". Quenya origin: alda – "tree" (compare with the Sindarin galadh); lómë – "dusk", "gloom", "twilight", "night" (when viewed favourably, not with negative connotations).
    Tauremornalómë – "Forest of Black Night". Quenya origin, compound of words mentioned above. 🙂

    (con't below)

    • Tauriel_ says:

      Methedras – "Last Mountain". Sindarin origin: methed – "end", "last point in line", "last of a series of items"; rass – "horn", "mountain peak".
      Angrenost – "Isengard". Sindarin origin: angren – "of iron"; ost – "fortress", "stronghold".
      Orofarnë – Ardalambion gives two meanings to this: "mountain-dwelling" or "mountain ash". But they're both based on the oro – "mountain". It's of Quenya origin.
      Lassemista – "leaf-grey", "grey-leaved". Quenya origin: lassë – "leaf", "mista" – "grey".
      Carnimírië – "red-jewelled". Quenya origin: carnë – "red", "scarlet"; mírë – "jewel", "treasure", "precious thing".
      Nan Curunír – "Valley of Saruman". Curunír or Curumo is Saruman's Quenya name and means "man of skill" or "the cunning one", derived from curu – "skill".

      And a few sentences of compounded words (it's a nice example how complex and repetitive the Entish syntax is):

      Laurelindórenan lindelorendor malinornélion ornemalin – "The valley where the trees in a golden light sing musically, a land of music and dreams; there are yellow trees there, it is a tree-yellow land"

      Taurelilómëa-tumbalemorna Tumbaletaurëa Lómëanor – "Forestmanyshadowed-deepvalleyblack Deepvalleyforested Gloomyland"

      • flootzavut says:

        Entish is so musical <3

      • msw188 says:

        Hm, I've been meaning to say this for a while, and it's kind of late now. But I can't help but feel that there is something a bit spoilery about doing this. Wait hold on. It's 200% awesome that you're doing this. I love reading these posts. I wonder, though, if my first experience reading the book would have been affected. I mean, part of the immersion into Middle Earth is going around hearing people saying things and NOT understanding what they are saying. And then when somebody in the book explains something about the language and/or a name, there's an "a-ha" moment.

        All that said, you do take the time to CLEARLY mark what your post is about to be, and anyone reading these comments while reading for the first time (mostly Mark, but maybe others) can, of course, choose whether to read these or not. But I just wanted to mention my thoughts.

      • settledforhistory says:

        While reading Treebeard's story about Entwives and Entnames I immediatly thought about your linguistic corner. It got so complicated to keep up with all the names but I was sure "Tauriel is going to explain all of this".
        You are a life saver!

        • Saphling says:

          That was my thought too! My first thought was, "…I hope these Entish phrases are included in Tauriel's post tomorrow morning."

          • Tauriel_ says:

            Thanks, guys. 🙂 I enjoy researching and writing them, and it warms my heart to see that people find them useful and appreciate them. 🙂

      • "there are yellow trees there, it is a tree-yellow land"

        I adore literal translations forever, because of things like this. <3

      • notemily says:

        I LOVE THOSE LAST TWO. ENTS I LOVE HOW YOU SPEAK.

    • ARITHMANCER says:

      INteresting! I always thought "burarum" was an Entish sound of disgust rather than a word. (Like "Ick" for humans…)

    • Smurphy says:

      I was reading this on the train last night and all I kept thinking the entire chapter was "I can't wait for Tauriel's Linguistic Corner for this chapter with ENTISH! YES!"

  6. Tauriel_ says:

    I didn't have time to prepare a proper post (I spent too much time on the Linguistic corner), so I'll just say this:

    TREEBEARD I LOVE YOU FOREVER AND WANT TO LIVE IN YOUR HOUSE <3 <3 <3

    • menegil says:

      Thy wisdom will forever pale all else, Tauriel.

      For this comment shall, indeed, echo throughout the halls of merriment, reaching the ears of all who are deemed Wise.

  7. Becky_J_ says:

    And now for some gifs!!!

    ENTS!!!
    <img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_laak35Nip41qe4tx4o1_400.gif"&gt;

    The Hobbit, just because I came across it and couldn't not share….. plus, I like to think that the Mayans knew how amazing the movie is going to be!!!
    <img src="http://s3.amazonaws.com/data.tumblr.com/tumblr_lya1fpDfPd1qm0j6ro1_1280.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=AKIAJ6IHWSU3BX3X7X3Q&Expires=1327629911&Signature=YWxYI9cg7pFNEdn0ooQ6fHGbp%2Fw%3D"&gt;

    And finally, MY FAVORITE of Merry and Pippin. Cracks me up every time. "Oh look, something in my hair, HOW ODD"
    <img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lbfsx8pn2h1qe4tx4o1_400.gif"&gt;

    Look, I WILL NEVER STOP SPOUTING MY LOVE FOR MERRY AND PIPPIN, AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME
    ~no apologies~

    • flootzavut says:

      The Mayan gif is FABULOUS!

      And NEVER stop with the Merry and Pippin love, they deserve it 😀

    • AmandaNekesa says:

      LOL! We can never have too much Merry & Pippin love here, it is just not possible! 😀

    • Saphling says:

      NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR LOVING MERRY AND PIPPIN.

    • So I am hesitating to edit your post, but I just wanted to point out that, per the FAQ:

      1) Can I post images from the movie?

      Yes, provided that they are ONLY from scenes that I have come across in the books. On that note, I’d rather you not unless it’s of a character. Like, don’t show me GIF’d images of entire sequences, but if you post a photo of Legolas, you’re not spoiling me.

      I don't think these constitute "entire sequences," but just be aware, since it seems like Mark doesn't want to see the whole movie in GIF form before he watches it for himself.

      • LarrikJ says:

        I'm surprised Mark is cool with images from the movie at all. I don't think I would be, in his position.

        In fact, didn't everyone refrain from posting images of the Balrog?

      • Becky_J_ says:

        Thank you! I have read that, and I thought that they didn't count as entire scenes…. but if they do, please don't hesitate!

    • Tauriel_ says:

      I applaud your choice of GIFs. 😀 <3

    • arctic_hare says:

      THERE CAN NEVER BE TOO MUCH LOVE FOR MERRY AND PIPPIN. I WOULDN'T DREAM OF TRYING TO STOP YOU. <3

  8. knut_knut says:

    THE ENTS!!!! <3 I’m so glad we’re finally at this point because OH MY GOD TREES THAT CAN MOVE AND TALK!!! I love pretty much everything about them. Their names GROW! They HERD TREES! THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK FOR THE ENTS.

    "Of course, it is likely enough, my friends," he said slowly, "likely enough that we are going to our doom: the last march of the Ents. But if we stayed at home and did nothing, doom would find us anyway, sooner or later.
    I love this. I love that TREES are fighting Saruman. AND THEY ARE GOING TO THEIR DOOM. THIS IS ENDLESS SADDNESS

    V ernyyl, ernyyl yvxrq gur jnl gur ragf ybbxrq va gur zbivrf. Naq fbhaqrq! Vg’f abg ubj V vzntvarq gurz (V gubhtug gurl’q or zber uhzna, yrff gerr) ohg V guvax vg jbexrq ernyyl jryy. Gur bayl guvat V qvqa’g yvxr jnf gurve eryhpgnapr gb svtug Fnehzna ng svefg. V jnf fnq gung gurl qvqa’g jnag gb svtug sbe Zvqqyr Rnegu! Ohg, abj gung V’z hfrq gb vg, gur punatrf znxr zber frafr. Nyfb, V YBBBBIR gur zhfvp jura gurl znepu gbjneqf Vfratneq.

    • AmandaNekesa says:

      Lrf! V nterr fb zhpu. V haqrefgnaq gurl cebonoyl jnagrq gb ohvyq gur grafvba n ovg zber jvgu gur vavgvny eryhpgnapr gb trg vaibyirq va gur jne, ohg V fb ybir gung fprar jura Gerrorneq frrf gur pubccrq qbja gerrf naq ur tvirf gung nznmvat lryy/ebne, naq gurl fgneg znepuvat gbjneqf Vfratneq. Gur zhfvp vf fb ornhgvshy! Znex vf tbvat gb ybir ubj gur Ragf qrfgebl Vfratneq jvgu jngre. Vg vf fhpu n ornhgvshy vzntr gung gur angheny sbeprf bs Ragf naq jngre jnfu njnl gur svygu naq pbeehcgvba bs Fnehzna.

      • thimbledore says:

        Bu zl tbbqarff, LRF. Fb nznmvat! Naq gur snpg gung vg pbzrf whfg ba gur urryf bs gur ragzbbg jurer gurl'er yvxr, "Ab gunaxf, thlf, jr nva'g n cneg bs guvf jne". Naq gura Gerrorneq vf yvxr, "<wnjqebc> NJ UNYR AB. VG VF FB BA. ENNNNNNNNU."

        • AmandaNekesa says:

          Lrnu, jr ernyyl trg n frafr bs gur cbjre bs gur Ragf jura Gerrorneq ebnef yvxr gung. V pnaabg uryc ohg guvax: bu Fnehzna lbh fvyyl jvmneq, lbh ner fb fperjrq. Arire zrff jvgu gur gerrf be gur Ragf, lbh fubhyq xabj guvf.

      • knut_knut says:

        V ybir gur Ragf pbzvat bhg bs gur sberfg gbb! Gur jubyr Ynfg Znepu bs gur Ragf vf zl qnq'f snibhevgr cneg bs gur zbivr

        • arctic_hare says:

          Vg'f zl snibevgr cneg gbb! V nz BOFRFFRQ jvgu gung fbat, naq gur fprar jurer gurl znepu bss vf fb tbetrbhf, naq gur qrfgehpgvba bs Vfratneq… bu, fb nznmvat! <3

        • stefb4 says:

          I can play it on the flute! In seventh grade (the seventh and eight graders combined for the "symphony" band while the sixth graders were concert band in junior high) we played 'Fellowship of the Ring' and in eighth (after our band director retired and I didn't want the change at aaall because we had the same guy since fourth grade) we played 'The Two Towers'. I used to love listening to the previous symphonic bands because they always did a movie soundtrack–like 'Jurassic Park' for instance. It was always ~magical~

          Let me tell you everything about my life.

          • monkeybutter says:

            lol we did the theme to Jurassic Park in middle school. We also did the theme from Hercules and "I Believe I Can Fly' (ya know…Space Jam.) Oh, middle school band <3

            • knut_knut says:

              WHAT! You got to play music from Space Jam???? Damn my parents for insisting I play the violin!

              • monkeybutter says:

                I'm pretty sure it was in symphonic orchestra, so the violin wouldn't have kept you out. Or, if it wasn't, you could have sang along and done all of the dramatic arm motions (and then the band director would yell at you!). I'M SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.

                • knut_knut says:

                  I Believe I Can Fly is the kind of song that needs violins anyway. And a choir. And maybe fireworks at the end. I could provide all three!

          • knut_knut says:

            We did a FoTR medley in orchestra! It turns out all the best bits are played by the horns and brass, so the violins were left with atmospheric harmonics -_- That’s what we get for getting the melody the other 99% of the time in orchestras.

            We played Jurassic Park too! The Jurassic Park theme is pretty much the standard middle school orchestra/band song. Playing it is a rite of passage.

          • flootzavut says:

            I got flute music with a backing CD and was soooooooooo excited, and then when I when to play along with it it was naff synth background 🙁

    • MrsGillianO says:

      "Gurl'er gnxvat gur uboovgf gb Vfratneq"…

    • flootzavut says:

      V jnf tbvat gb fnl, Gur Ynfg Znep bs gur Rag vf FBBBBBBBBBBBBB snohybhf <3 nf fbba nf V fgneg ernqvat nobhg Ragf vg'f va zl urnq, vg'f fb znwrfgvp naq cresrpg 😀

      • Diddle-de-dum says:

        I always listen to The Dreams of Trees whilst reading this chapter, it's so atmospheric and perfect. In fact, listening now… methinks I hear the distant murmering of an Entmoot…

    • castlewayjay says:

      V'q qba'g yvxr gung punatr va gur svyz, rvgure.

  9. MidnightLurker says:

    RA HOOM RAH!

    I want to be an Ent. I want to live a kajillion years, be slow and patient and tough, sleep standing up in the rain! CAN THIS BE ARRANGED.

    This is kinda like the interlude with Tom Bombadil only it ACTUALLY MATTERS. 🙂

    MUPPET LORD OF THE RINGS: Treebeard is played by SWEETUMS with his hair and beard dyed green and leaves glued on.

  10. unefeeverte says:

    "JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP?"

    Guvf vf gur ORFG GUVAT RIRE. BU ZNEX. Gjb zber puncgref, V guvax?

    • Becky_J_ says:

      *snort* I laughed about this for A WHILE. It is pretty much the greatest thing ever. Can't wait!!!

    • Jenny_M says:

      Abcr, gbzbeebj'f puncgre. FDHRR!

      • unefeeverte says:

        BZT gung'f evtug, gurl nyernql ybfg gur ubefrf. LNL. Znex vf tbaan QVR jura ur svaqf bhg. (Be, re, cebonoyl qvrq jura ur sbhaq bhg, juvpu jr'yy xabj gbzbeebj.)

        • AmandaNekesa says:

          haha…yeah, vg'f xvaq bs jrveq xabjvat gung Znex vf nurnq va uvf erivrjf, orpnhfr ur nyernql xabjf nobhg jung unccraf n srj (be frireny) puncgref nurnq, ohg jr bayl trg gb frr vg ba n qnl-ol-qnl onfvf. V pna'g jnvg gb frr ubj ur ernpgrq gb gur erirny va arkg puncgre!

          • flootzavut says:

            Yes! on all counts… V graq gb jbex ba gur nffhzcgvba gung 1) orvat nf guvf vf uvf wbo abj ur znl bppnfvbanyyl abg or nf sne nurnq va ernqvat nf jura ur jnf whfg qbvat guvf ng jrrxraqf naq 2) gurer ner crbcyr jub ner ernqvat nybat naq V qba'g jnag gb fcbvy gurz, rvgure. Ohg vg vf fbeg bs rkpvgvatsehngengvatnzhfvatjrveq gb ernyvfr gung Znex npghnyyl nyernql unf ernq naq ernpgrq, naq sbe bapr vg'f hf jnvgvat sbe uvz, abg uvz jbaqrevat jung nyy gur EBG13 vf nyy nobhg!

            • AmandaNekesa says:

              Yeah, exactly. Vg'f n engure fgenatr guvat gb or hafher jurgure Znex vf fgvyy gehyl hacercnerq sbe na hcpbzvat puncgre.

    • Sinnive says:

      gbzbeebj! .. although Mark probably read ahread far enough and knows by now?

    • @LarrikJ says:

      Gur irel arkg puncgre, ab yrff!

    • @MeagenImage says:

      Znex or ubarfg jvgu hf, unir lbh orra ernqvat nurnq? Jr jba'g or natel, jr cebzvfr.

      • AmandaNekesa says:

        Actually, IIRC, Mark had all of this week's reviews done last week/weekend, so that he could work on some maintenance/improvements to the site, like the FAQ & Suggestions. I'm not sure if he's read ahead for next week though, and it makes me curious…

      • notemily says:

        He does get reviews prepared in advance, but he has given us his word that he ALWAYS stops to write the review before reading the next chapter, so we get his 100% unspoiled thoughts.

    • MsPrufrock says:

      Znex guvaxf ur xabjf ubj Zvqqyr Rnegu jbexf, juvpu vf cerpvbhf. Fb hacercnerq, sbe nyy gvzr.

    • platoapproved says:

      I legit lol'ed. 😀

    • AmandaNekesa says:

      V xabj, V guvax jr nyy pbyyrpgviryl fabegrq naq tevaarq rivyyl jura ur fnvq gung! Fb hacercnerq!

    • X15lm204 says:

      Oh man, this sort of thing is why I really shouldn't be checking Mark Reads in the middle of a lecture. I swear I almost died holding in all my laughs.

    • flootzavut says:

      Yeah, orfg yvar bs n erivrj rire be orfg yvar bs n erivrj rire??

      Vg whfg bppheerq gb zr gb purpx gjvggre naq frr vs uvf svefg ernpgvba gb gur erghea bs gur ovt T vf hc lrg…

    • fantasy_fan says:

      Made me laugh too! Naq Znex unf hfrq hc nyy gur pncvgny yrggref va guvf erivrj, fb gbzbeebj jr'er tbvat gb or gerngrq gb vapburerag fpernzvat – gung'f nyy gung'f yrsg.

    • clodia_risa says:

      Abj jr xabj ur jba’g or hcfrg ol gur qrhf rk znpuvan bs Tnaqnys zntvpnyyl fubjvat hc ntnva!

      V pna’g oryvrir ur npghnyyl fnvq gung! Vg’f yvxr ur’f gebyyvat hf!

    • blossomingpeach says:

      So glad someone posted this, because it made my morning. BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA.

    • Zoli says:

      Yep, loling forever! I can't wait. 😀

    • Laurelluin says:

      I am still smiling so big my cheeks hurt from this. It's going to be faaaabulooooooouuuuuuussssss!

    • BetB says:

      I know this isn't true but fbzrgvzrf V srry yvxr Znex vf gebyyvat hf yvxr Gbyxvra'f punenpgref gebyy rnpu bgure. V'z cerggl fher Znex jbhyqa'g qb gung ohg qnat vg, vg whfg frrzf gbb zhpu bs n pbvapvqrapr!

    • enigmaticagentscully says:

      And there was much LOLing in Mark's fandom that day.

    • Katie says:

      So…Mark was actually prepared, for once? 🙂

  11. yamikuronue says:

    All trees are living, you silly goose. 😀

  12. rabidsamfan says:

    TREEBEARD NEEDS ALL THE CAPSLOCKS!

    Yes, yes yes! I'm so glad you love Treebeard. I adore him too, and love how hastily he takes Merry and Pippin under his wing….er….limb. And Merry and Pippin take to him straight away, which is wonderful considering that the last tree they encountered that could move tried to EAT THEM.

    • Rheinman says:

      Yep, not any mood whiplash here, just move along.

      Although, in fairness, I have never liked willows when compared to oaks, aspens, and maples. I'm not sure if this started before or after reading LOTR, but I get a seriously creepy claustrphobic vibe when inside of a willow's branches. Also, they cause serious problems with the plumbing. Bad Willow, naughty Willow!

  13. ABBryant says:

    BU TNAQNYS, V FREVBHFYL ZVFF LBH NAQ LBHE FNFFL JVMNEQ NQIVPR. JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP?

    Yby, yby naq nyfb yby

    …That is all.

  14. JonT says:

    JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? QNZA VG, GUNG’F ABG UBJ GUVF JBEXF, OHG JUNGRIRE.

    Dear me, Mr. Holmes. Dear me.

    • ThreeBooks says:

      omg. Now I can't stop imagining, like, Moran as Saruman and Moriarty as Sauron and the cabbie as Boromir and Sherlock as Aragorn and

      this needs to be written immediately

      • Ezile says:

        V pna'g oryvrir ur whfg thrffrq gur ORFG GUVAT gung jvyy unccra va gur arkg puncgre (vf vg gur arkg puncgre? Fbba naljnl!) NAQ GURA QVFZVFFRQ VG NF VZCBFFVOYR!!!

  15. Ryan Lohner says:

    The legend goes that Tolkien was hearing Treebeard's voice as that of CS Lewis, his close friend since their school days. Here's the one surviving recording of Lewis' voice to give you the idea:

    [youtube JHxs3gdtV8A http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHxs3gdtV8A youtube]

    Peter Jackson was very aware that the Ents could come off looking silly onscreen, so he was very relieved when the visual artists came in early on with the perfect drawing of Treebeard.

  16. TheFormerAstronomer says:

    Haven't read the whole review yet, but:

    JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? QNZA VG, GUNG’F ABG UBJ GUVF JBEXF, OHG JUNGRIRE"

    Hahahahahahaha, V pna'g jnvg hagvy gbzbeebj. Ab ernyyl. V NPGHNYYL PNAABG JNVG NAQ ERDHVER N GVZR ZNPUVAR VS NALBAR UNF BAR XGUKONV

  17. Juliana Moreli says:

    JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP?

    BZT, v whfg unq gb fgbc ernqvat vg naq znxr n pbzzrag…frevbhfyl Znex….frevbhfyl…lbh ner fb hacercnerq!!!!!

  18. Melewen says:

    “JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP?”

    Man, he is so not prepared.

  19. Sarah TX says:

    I think it's pretty clear by now why so many nerdy/geeky kids read these books and fell the eff in love with them.

    THERE ARE TALKING TREES AND THEY ARE AWESOME. They want to be your friend if only you'd stop cutting them down!

  20. knut_knut says:

    I was a terrible person and pre-wrote my comment and then missed this gem:

    BU TNAQNYS, V FREVBHFYL ZVFF LBH NAQ LBHE FNFFL JVMNEQ NQIVPR. JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? QNZA VG, GUNG’F ABG UBJ GUVF JBEXF, OHG JUNGRIRE.

    WHFG LBH JNVG HAGVY GUR ARKG PUNCGRE! V whfg ernyvmrq gung V’z tbvat gb zvff gbzbeebj’f cbfg orpnhfr V’yy or ng gur qragvfg trggvat zl grrgu qevyyrq gb cvrprf orpnhfr zl grrgu ner whfg trargvpnyyl shpxrq. JUL NER QRAGVFGF GUR JBEFG?

    • flootzavut says:

      VG'F YVXR GBYXVRA UNF URNEQ ZNEX'FJVFU NAQ JVYY TENAG VG GBZBEEBJ!

      Lrf V tevaarq FB JVQR jura V ernq gung :Q

      • Fb qbrf gung znxr Gbyxvra n Gvzr-Ybeq?

        • flootzavut says:

          😮

          … YES!

        • AmandaNekesa says:

          Haha…yes! I fully believe this now!

          • flootzavut says:

            Pbafvqrevat gur furre ibyhzr bs guvatf Znex unf npprvqragnyyl cerqvpgrq, be unf cerqvpgrq naq gura vg'f orra gur gbgny bccbfvgr gb n uvynevbhf rkgrag, vg'f ortvaavat gb frrz zber naq zber yvxryl…

            Lbh jbhyqa'g whfg jnyx vagb n ibypnab…
            Gurer ner ab tubfgf va zvqqyr rnegu…
            Jr'yy cebonoyl arire xabj na bep'f anzr…
            Jul pna'g tnaqnys pbzr onpx ol zntvp?

            V'z fher gurer ner bguref… V'z fgnegvat gb jvfu V unq znqr n yvfg 😀

            • AmandaNekesa says:

              YES we need to compile this list! Vg vf xvaqn fpnel ubj znal guvatf ur unf nppvqragnyyl cerqvpgrq fb sne. Znex vf fjvsgyl orpbzvat n ~gehr frre~

              • knut_knut says:

                Yes to the list too!! Uvf cerqvpgvbaf ner fpnevyl npphengr. Ur jba'g unir gb jbeel nobhg arire trggvat uvf Ubtjnegf yrggre, fbba ur'yy or tbbq rabhtu gb grnpu ng Ubtjnegf!

            • blossomingpeach says:

              I command someone to make this list and post it at the end of the last book for us all to wonder at out of rot13. Ready…go! 🙂

    • LarrikJ says:

      Okay, I love that you ROT13'd that you are going to the dentist.

      (Just to be clear, that doesn't mean his comment is safe to decipher.)

    • monkeybutter says:

      Boo, I'm sorry. I hope your appointment goes well.

  21. Alice says:

    OMG…OMG…Treebeard!!Yes!!!!!When I first read about him I was so intrigued by this being that Tolkien created…a talking and walking tree. A tree sheperd…wow!
    I found it very funny when I discovered that the artists when they had to do the art for this chapter always found it so difficult to picture Treebeard, and always wondered: is it a tree-man,or is it a man-tree ? LOL…if you understand what am I trying to say in my poor english :p. Actually,I didn't find it at all that hard to picture them,the Ents,and my image came very close with the one that the movies came up with. And I always admired those conceptual artist how dedicated they were.
    So…enough with my ramblings and here is some very funny and some very good depictions of the Ents and Treebeard 🙂

    *first the hobbits exploring Fangorn Forrest and then the Entmoot by Ted Nasmith ^_^

    <img src="http://www.dana-mad.ru/gal/images/Ted%20Nasmith/The%20Complete%20Guide%20to%20Middle-Earth/ted%20nasmith_the%20complete%20guide%20to%20middle-earth_fangorn%20forest.jpg"&gt;

    <img src="http://www.tednasmith.com/lotr2/TN-Treebeard_and_the_Entmoot.jpg"&gt;

    :)) the Ents look like such hippies…(and I will give you another hippie-like entmoot,dunno the artist,sorry)

    <img src="http://img-fan.theonering.net/~rolozo/images/sweet/entmoot.jpg"&gt;

    *Alan Lee <3

    <img src="http://www.dana-mad.ru/gal/images/Alan%20Lee/Calendar%202007/alan_lee_cal2007_07.jpg"&gt;

    *by Angus McPriders (not so bad 🙂 )

    <img src="http://fantasy.mrugala.net/Angus%20Mc%20Priders/Angus%20-%20Chez%20Sylvebarbe.jpg"&gt;

    and yay…..the Ents are going to punnish that nasty Saruman XD (just an image of Orthanc by the brothers Hildebrandt ,dunno if it was posted during FOTR)

    <img src="http://img-fan.theonering.net/~rolozo/images/hildebrandt/orthanc.jpg"&gt;

    Is it me,or Treebeard looks a lil' like Howe in the pic Tauriel posted?

  22. Katie says:

    Ok, not to put a dampener on all the ent-love, but: Elves wanted trees to talk, but not ponies!!?????!!!

    • settledforhistory says:

      Maybe the ponies have forgotten how to talk, like most of the Ents, who simply became trees.

    • Geolojazz says:

      Hmm, maybe they did get ponies to talk, and regretted it…have you by chance seen that sequence regarding talking monkeys in Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs?

      OR MAYBE: All the ponies can talk, BUT THEY CHOOSE NOT TO. D: THEY ARE ADVANCED BEINGS, WE ARE NOT READY FOR THEIR WISDOM!!

    • Becky_J_ says:

      You know, I was thinking about it, and I think the reason Tolkien doesn't let the horses/ponies talk is because they are used as mounts for a lot of his characters. How odd would it be to have an intelligent horse, but then you had to ride him? I think that kind of opens up a can of worms about how they shouldn't be ridden because they are intelligent and can speak….

      THEN AGAIN I MAY JUST BE READING TOO MUCH INTO IT WHERE'RE THE TALKING PONIES TOLKIEN

  23. Stephen_M says:

    I had forgotten just how much happens in this chapter, yet everything seems to build nicely. It also contains the one line that is almost guaranteed to make me sad:

    "The last march of the Ents"

    There's such a sense of finality to it, made all the worse by the fact these are creatures so old they remember the world without wizards. They know what may happen, even that it's likely, yet they go anyway. I suppose, in a way, it's a fantastic summary of what these books have been about thus far – the passing of old yet fair things out of the necessity of building the new.

    • Rheinman says:

      Fcbvyre nyreg, ohg Jvmneqf unir bayl orra nebhaq fvapr gur Guveq Ntr. Nal rys pna nyfb erzrzore n gvzr orsber jvmneqf. Va snpg, gur ryirf jrer gurer jura gurl tbg bss gur obng.

  24. AmandaNekesa says:

    And the capslock review emerges! Oh Mark, this review is a thing of beauty and it makes me feel so much joy to see your fanboying about Treebeard!

    I HAVE DONE NOTHING BUT SWIM IN NIHILISTIC FUTILITY UNTIL TREEBEARD.

    JUST IMAGINE YOU’RE LAYING ON YOUR BED AND ALL OF A SUDDEN A BUNCH OF PUPPIES COME TUMBLING FROM THE CEILING AND THEY ALL START WAGGING THEIR TAILS AND YIPPING AND YOU CAN BARELY BREATHE, BUT YOU DON’T CARE BECAUSE IT’S AN AVALANCHE OF PUPPIES,SO YOU JUST SUBMIT TO THEIR OPPRESSIVE CUTENESS. THAT’S WHAT JUST HAPPENED WHEN I READ THIS CHAPTER.

    Can we all experience this avalanche of puppies?

  25. Alice says:

    Maybe I'm wrong so please forgive me,but isn't it a spoiler to show how Treebeard looks in the movies? I mean I thought that also showing pics with the actors that play in the movie was a spoiler,since I belived that Mark didn't want to know that the actor X plays the Y character. :S Help?

    • Per the FAQ:

      1) Can I post images from the movie?

      Yes, provided that they are ONLY from scenes that I have come across in the books. On that note, I’d rather you not unless it’s of a character. Like, don’t show me GIF’d images of entire sequences, but if you post a photo of Legolas, you’re not spoiling me.

    • atheistsisters says:

      That's what I thought, too…

    • Alice says:

      @ spectralbovine: thank you for making it clearer 🙂

      • xpanasonicyouthx says:

        I used to be more strict about it, but these days I sort of don't care about it. MORE GIFS ALWAYS MEANS MORE MORE JOY

        • Tauriel_ says:

          Also, LOTR is such a massive thing (both the book and the films), and there's still so many chapters to go, that by the time you reach the end you probably won't remember the GIFs from the beginning, anyway… 😀

          • flootzavut says:

            Hah ain't that the truth! I suppose that is one more advantage of Team One Novel 😀 – Mark will have plenty of time to forget!

        • Nathan L says:

          I don't think stills (or even gifs) will spoil you on the movies that much, anyway. The beauty of the Lord of the Rings movies is a perfect fusion of scoring, performances and visuals. You've still got two thirds to experience 🙂

  26. Ryan Lohner says:

    And now the awesome story of how Tolkien got the idea to create Ents: as a young boy, he saw a production of Macbeth and was extremely disappointed that the whole "Birnham Wood comes to Dunsinane" thing didn't literally mean the forest was going to attack the castle. And it stayed with him long enough that when he started writing his own stories, he decided he was going to do that scene properly.

    I love the way Tom Shippey puts it in the special features: "And it turns out to be some guys with leaves in their hats. What a bungle!"

  27. castlewayjay says:

    thanks for your wonderful review, Mark. It has made my day, and it's only 8:20
    so many good things in this chapter – Treebeard getting roused to action! The sadness of the Ents over tress that have been killed, and how beautifuly it is expressed.. A wizard should know better!

    • castlewayjay says:

      forgot to say – I always hoped that the Entwives would be found in the Shire someday. I've decided to believe this is true.

      and I love Merry & Pippin telling Treebeard about their journey so far – the three of them learning about each other.
      War is looming.

      • Eefje says:

        When I grow up I want to be an Entwife.

      • atheistsisters says:

        Back when I was a wee child and did not know about fanfic, I contemplated writing a story to finish the sad tale of the Entwives. It should end happily, is what I thought, or else I might get depressed and pine away on the Ents' behalf.

        • Rot13'd juuust in case:

          V jnf cerggl fher gur Ragjvirf jrer va gur Fuver gbb, V guvax gurer vf npghnyyl fbzrguvat fbzrjurer va gur obbx gung tvirf gung vzcerffvba, ohg V pna'g erzrzore jung be jurer vg jnf. Zl tveysevraq jub unf n orggre zrzbel guna zr pbhyqa'g chg ure svatre ba vg rvgure. Qbrf nalbar erzrzore?

          • castlewayjay says:

            the discussion in the Green Dragon in one of the first two chapters mentions something Entish, when you go back to it.

  28. @LarrikJ says:

    I always assumed this could be basically your favorite chapter of any book ever.

  29. flootzavut says:

    SO PLEASED YOU LOVE TREEBEARD.

    Not surprised, mind. Just pleased 😀

    <img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v172/sarahce/funny-pictures-kitten-is-too-cute.jpg&quot; border="0" alt="Photobucket Pictures, Images and Photos" />

    "JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? QNZA VG, GUNG’F ABG UBJ GUVF JBEXF, OHG JUNGRIRE."

    …. 😀

    Vg'f xvyyvat zr…. pnaabg JNVG sbe gbzbeebj!

    "THIS IS SOME OF THE MOST BRILLIANT AND IMMERSIVE WORLD-BUILDING I HAVE EVER COME ACROSS IN LITERATURE."

    Word.

    I love the word Entmoot… it's so much fun to say, try it!

    Pippin <3 yet again, I love that hobbit! <3

    *happy sigh* I love this chapter <3

  30. Eefje says:

    I LOVE THE ENTS!

    Also, Hobbits are not Orcs.

    • @MeagenImage says:

      Man those tine non-tree things all look alike, don'tchaknow.

      • Eefje says:

        Oh yes! Hobbit-hair from above obviously looks like an Orc-helmet. It's so confusing!

      • Nathan L says:

        I've always liked the thought that an Ent could distinguish two different types of tree from miles away, but give him a hobbit and a man and he'd have to very carefully examine them (cross referencing with the old songs) to decide which was which.

        • flootzavut says:

          Yes! Totally. It's the total inverse of the awful "joke" that used to be made about "you all look alike to me" with different races. Also reminds me of Big Bang Theory where Raj's dad tell his American friends that they all look alike to him…

          • Nathan L says:

            Well really, when you think about how very /different/ some types of trees look from one another, the differences between two people or even between an elf and a man, or a man and a dwarf are kind of negligible in comparison

            • Tauriel_ says:

              THIS.

            • flootzavut says:

              Oh totally, but that's something people often don't think about. Like I say, it's like that old terrible joke about people seeing those of other races as "all looking the same" – which these days is often reversed by non-white races telling white people, "you all look the same to us". It's what I like about it – it challenges our tendency to assume that a tree is "just a tree" when Treebeard and the other Ents make all these fine distinctions, and then they find it difficult to differentiate between an orc and a hobbit, which from our biped-centric POV is a very, very easy distinction to make. I also feel it's a little like Tolkien is saying, look harder, see the richness, don't make the mistake of thinking that all these trees are the same 🙂

              • Aris Katsaris says:

                [quote]Like I say, it's like that old terrible joke about people seeing those of other races as "all looking the same".[/quote]

                Such things were not really a joke I think — it's a neurobiological/psychological fact that people who don't have experience interacting with other races have less capacity to distinguish faces of said races. There's some studies about the effect of how exposing infants to faces from different races helps them maintain the capacity to distinguish faces : See here http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/releases/225745.p

                • flootzavut says:

                  Yes, of course – but it gets/got used in sitcoms etc as a joke, which is, IMO, fairly offensive. But Tolkien turns it around (as that scene from BBT also turns it around) by having Ents able to recognise all the different trees… but have huge difficulty seeing the difference between Orcs and Hobbits, which for us seems a very easy distinction to make.

        • Tauriel_ says:

          Can YOU recognise a larch tree from quite a long way away? :p

          • rabidsamfan says:

            I never saw a larch until I visited Scotland, and that was so many years ago all I can tell you about them is that they looked like aspen from a distance in the fall.

  31. cait0716 says:

    The info-dump dragged a bit for me. This chapter was long and I definitely though "Get on with it" a few times.

    But it was mostly interesting. The history of Saruman was cool and Ent-culture is so alien and interesting. I loved it.

    The end of the chapter was especially good. There was this rising tension as the Ents were marching off the Isengard that was just spectacular.

  32. Danielle says:

    YAY FOR CAPS LOCK REVIEW!!!!!
    YAY FOR TREEBEARD!!!!!!

    But serious Mark, if you have severe dog allergies–AN AVALANCHE OF PUPPIES IS THE MOST HORRIFYING THING EVER!!!!!!!!!

  33. msw188 says:

    So I will admit that when I first read this chapter as a child, it seemed really long and kind of boring. I WAS A CHILD, I WAS DUMB. Not only are the Ents probably the most interesting and bizarre creatures we get (with the possible exception of Tom Bombadil), their story is one of the most heartbreaking things ever. Mark has remarked on this technique in other reviews, and I will remark on it here.

    We get the Entwife background, which is really sad, but told in a wistful rather than tragic manner, as highlighted by the song that, as Treebeard points out, is "lighthearted, quick-worded, and soon over". And then Tolkien DISTRACTS us with awesome. The Entmoot goes on, Pippin and Merry hang out with an Ent who got his name by SAYING YES TO AN ELDER ENT BEFORE HE HAD FINISHED HIS QUESTION. The Ents march, and they're singing songs full of awesome and marching along basically using themselves as drums. These are basically definitions 2 and 5 of "awesome" in any reasonable dictionary.

    And then we get Treebeard's speech about how this is most likely the end. "It is not a hasty resolve". In fact, this is the final act for a race who has long since come to regard itself as doomed to die out. I'm not sure if there is any paragraph in this book so far more tragic than this one from Treebeard.

    PS: "I am not very, hm, bendable." That's definition 1 of "awesome", in case you were wondering.

    • msw188 says:

      Damn, I can't really say enough about this chapter. The Ents are just such an interesting bunch of creatures! They stand up to sleep! They LIKE to spend a WEEK breathing! They live so long, like trees, that it makes so much sense for them to talk and think like they do. Their voices SOUND LIKE A WOODWIND INSTRUMENT. Basically this means that when Treebeard talks it sounds like a bass clarinet is talking, and that is probably the awesomest thing ever.

      Their language names things by describing them and their growth. The use of the word "hill" for something that has stood for ages? This is a truly strange concept to Treebeard. They only drink? Of course, trees only 'drink'! Mark has already emphasized a lot of this, but I couldn't resist doing a bit myself.

    • arctic_hare says:

      Don't use the word "dumb" on this site, it is an ableist word.

  34. bookworm67 says:

    JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? QNZA VG, GUNG’F ABG UBJ GUVF JBEXF, OHG JUNGRIRE.

    Oh my god.

  35. BetB says:

    BU TNAQNYS, V FREVBHFYL ZVFF LBH NAQ LBHE FNFFL JVMNEQ NQIVPR. JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? QNZA VG, GUNG’F ABG UBJ GUVF JBEXF, OHG JUNGRIRE.

    UNUNUNU Jurrrrr!! Arkg puncgre, Znex, arkg puncgre. YBYBYBY

  36. YES! I AM SO GLAD YOU LIKE TREEBEARD AS MUCH AS YOU DO; IN FACT YOU HAVE INFECTED ME WITH ALL THE CAPS LOCK AND I HAVE TO BE HAPPY BECAUSE TREEBEARD IS AWESOME AND IT IS INDEED A CRIME THAT HE AND OTHER ENTS DO NOT EXIST. (IN FACT THE FACT THAT MIDDLE-EARTH IS ENTIRELY FICTIONAL IS STILL SOMETHING I CAN'T ACCEPT.)

    In my defense, I was even using all caps in my post yesterday about Treebeard. I love him so.

    Also, can I point out something?

    From The Fellowship of the Ring :
    'All right,' said Sam, laughing with the rest. 'But what about these Tree-men, these giants, as you might call them? They say that one bigger than a tree was seen away up beyond the North Moors not long back.'
    'Who's they?'
    'My cousin Hal, for one. He works for Mr. Boffin at Overhill and goes up to Northfarthing for the hunting. He
    saw one.'
    'Says he did, perhaps. Your Hal's always saying he's seen things; and maybe he sees things that ain't there.'
    'But this one was as big as an elm tree and walking- walking seven yards to a stride, if it was an inch.'

    COINCIDENCE? I THINK NOT. TOLKIEN MENTIONED THE ENTS BACK IN THE FIRST BOOK.

    • Marie the Bookwyrm says:

      Maybe it was an Entwife! Treebeard said the Shire sounded like a place that they would enjoy.

    • Fuchsia says:

      I laughed when we read that part and the new readers just brushed it off. It's always been my headcanon that the Entwives are in the Shire. YOU CANNOT TAKE THIS AWAY FROM ME.

      Also, we've got how big an ent-stride is: seven yards!

      • blossomingpeach says:

        That has also always been my headcanon. I sit there reading, wondering why Merry & Pippin don't say, "THE ENTWIVES ARE IN THE SHIRE!!!!"

    • notemily says:

      Oh dude I thought that was just foreshadowing for Old Man Willow.

      Also, if seven yards is an Ent-stride, then SEVENTY THOUSAND Ent-strides (the distance Treebeard supposedly travels while carrying the hobbits) must be a truly epic distance. *calculates* Uh… that's TWO HUNDRED AND SEVENTY-EIGHT MILES. NO way he walked that far! Is this even possible? SOMEONE GET ME A MAP OF FANGORN FOREST

      • Lol, unfortunately I have no map, but I think we might have to accept that Sam's measurement there isn't the most accurate. I think we can forgive him- it was his cousin and not himself, after all. And as regards how many strides Treebeard took, the terrain in Fangorn didn't sound very level, so that might also have affected their number.

  37. bookworm67 says:

    I think we're setting a new record for gur ahzore bs pbzzragf dhbgvat gur fnzr cneg bs gur erivrj naq ynhtuvat ng gur vebal. Other than that bit about you-know-who on the Buffy site. 😛

  38. Senna says:

    Mmm. In addition to the awesomeness that is Treebeard and the Ents, I also love how wholly the atmosphere of the story shifts in this chapter. From all the fear and danger and suspense, this is just sort of green and peaceful. It's as refreshing as a drink an Ent might offer you. 🙂 It speaks to Fangorn and his forest, but also a little bit to the mindset of Merry and Pippin I think, and the way they approach these new experiences.

    • castlewayjay says:

      nice observation. and Merry & Pippin deserve this, I think

    • AmandaNekesa says:

      What I also find fascinating his how many people have warned the company and spoken ill of Fangorn forest. We get the sense that while it could be dangerous, if more beings in Middle-earth took the time to experience the forest and the Ents, they might speak differently. Here it is like an oasis amongst so much suffering and evil. You can tell Tolkien loved nature, and had a particular fondness for trees. <3

      • castlewayjay says:

        interesting question – wondering myself how Fangorn got this bad rep

        • monkeybutter says:

          Lothlorien has a similar bad rep amongst men. Maybe it's because they're afraid and disconnected from nature?

          • AmandaNekesa says:

            Yeah, I think it's probably a combination of disconnect, maybe along with a few bad encounters between trees, Ents, and dwarves or men, that's just gotten worse and slowly it's become a point of legend or contempt on either side. Lack of exposure between the different races over time probably doesn't help, either. As a result, there are probably those on either side that could be considered dangerous to the other, which only perpetuates the problem. (okay, I'm hoping my thoughts here make sense, it's getting late and I should probably get to bed…)

        • rabidsamfan says:

          Well, Treebeard says that there are parts of the forest that are dangerous, and that some of the trees that have gotten more Entish aren't to be trusted, so there is some peril involved in just wandering around the place.

        • Nathan L says:

          Arrq gb ebg13 orpnhfr vg'f uvagvat ng pbzvat riragf, ohg ol gur raq bs guvf 'obbx' V qba'g guvax lbh'yy or jbaqrevat!

      • Senna says:

        Yes! So many dire words and we get there and its really peaceful. Perhaps the people spreading the rumors tried to go in there without respecting the trees and the forest?

      • flootzavut says:

        I suppose that many times, men and dwarves if they went in, would go in with axes. Whereas Merry and Pippin are with Treebeard 🙂

        I think it might be (a little like the forest near Buckland) be dangerous depending on the intruder's attitude and how awake the trees are at any given moment…

  39. Anzel89 says:

    – ENTS!!! I LOVE YOU TREEBEARD!!! We were sooo looking forward to your reaction Mark! This was one of the things that was really hard to keep quiet about, and I'm glad it wasn't spoiled for you!!

    – Merry and Pippin are fantastic as always.

    – That list also plagues my life…though in a different order and far longer. (Has been a proud fantasy hound since the age of 5)

    – BU TNAQNYS, V FREVBHFYL ZVFF LBH NAQ LBHE FNFFL JVMNEQ NQIVPR. JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? QNZA VG, GUNG’F ABG UBJ GUVF JBEXF, OHG JUNGRIRE.

    KQ YBY!!! GUNG'F RKNPGYL UBJ GUVF JBEXF! Bayl Tnaqnys cnegvpvcngrf va n xvpxnff svtug jvgu n Onyebt orsber ur qbrf gru zntvpxf!

    – Nyfb….BAR PUNCGRE PYBFRE GB RBJLA!!!!! SHPX LRN!!….fbeel ohg fur vf zl nyy gvzr snibevgr punenpgre va gurfr obbxf. ^_^

  40. Tauriel_ says:

    JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP?

    *gleeful cackle* Oh, Mark, you're SO NOT PREPARED!!! 😀

  41. MsPrufrock says:

    JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? QNZA VG, GUNG’F ABG UBJ GUVF JBEXF, OHG JUNGRIRE.

    Nununununununun!!!

    So, prior to my second year of law school, I was contemplating trying out for moot court and posted about it on twitter. One of my best friends responded by asking:

    "What's moot court? It sounds like something ents would do."

  42. Saphling says:

    YOU ARE TOTALLY JUSTIFIED IN BEING HASTY TO LOVE THE ENTS, MARK. THEY ARE WORTH BEING HASTY FOR, FOR LO, THEY ARE AWESOME. I LOVE THAT TREEBEARD, WHEN HE'S ABOUT TO GO TO SLEEP, FORGETS FOR A WHILE THAT PIPPIN AND MERRY AREN'T YOUNG ENTS AS WELL, WHO STAND WHILE SLEEPING.

    ALSO, Treebeard's song about the Entwives always makes me cry. I reread it last night, and it's impact hasn't lessened.

    I'm so happy you found joy in this chapter, Mark. There's so much to love about it.

  43. Jenny_M says:

    So, a little late posting this question but: what are everyone's theories on the Entwives?

    My personal one is that they're the trees mentioned in the very early chapters when it's mentioned that strange things are afoot in the Shire and people have seen what look like walking trees in the north.

    • Saphling says:

      YES. That's what I always thought, too. Hoping that they'd eventually be found.

    • fantasy_fan says:

      I think perhaps the tree mentioned at the beginning was a wandering Ent, looking for Entwives. The Entwives, well, maybe they've settled down in the sunny Shire and are very peacefully looking after the orchards and those who tend them. Treebeard is right, they'd like it there. All except for a few that've gone insane, and are lurking in the Old Forest….

    • MrsGillianO says:

      V srne gung gur Qrnq Znefurf ner jung orpnzr bs gurz. 🙁

      • castlewayjay says:

        Abcr gur Qrnq Znefurf ner svyyrq jvgu gur erznvaf bs jneevbef sebz byq onggyrf. – V'z cerggl fher. naq vg jnf cebonoyl vafcverq ol Gbyxvra'f rkcrevraprf va Jbeyq Jne V

    • That's my headcanon, I have to say. As Marie the Bookwyrm pointed out above, Treebeard says they would like the hobbits' country. I like to think that they were helping behind the scenes a bit with the Shire's gardens and crops and whatnot.

    • flootzavut says:

      That's the theory I like best/want to be true.

    • calimie says:

      Yes, I've also thought that.
      Nyfb, V unir terng ubcrf sbe gur rnfgrea ynaqf, cnegvphyneyl gubfr gung jrer Phvivrara bapr.

    • rabidsamfan says:

      Yup. I definitely agree. To the point of having written fic about it. (spoilery, tho.)
      http://talechallenge03.livejournal.com/8879.html

    • floppus says:

      From one of Tolkien's letters:

      V guvax gung va snpg gur Ragjvirf unq qvfnccrnerq sbe tbbq, orvat qrfgeblrq jvgu gurve tneqraf va gur Jne bs gur Ynfg Nyyvnapr (Frpbaq Ntr 3429-3441) jura Fnheba chefhrq n fpbepurq rnegu cbyvpl naq ohearq gurve ynaq ntnvafg gur nqinapr bs gur Nyyvrf qbja gur Naqhva (iby. VV c. 79 ersref gb vg [1]). Gurl fheivirq bayl va gur 'ntevphygher' genafzvggrq gb Zra (naq Uboovgf). Fbzr, bs pbhefr, znl unir syrq rnfg, be rira unir orpbzr rafynirq: glenagf rira va fhpu gnyrf zhfg unir na rpbabzvp naq ntevphygheny onpxtebhaq gb gurve fbyqvref naq zrgny-jbexref. Vs nal fheivirq fb, gurl jbhyq vaqrrq or sne rfgenatrq sebz gur Ragf, naq nal enccebpurzrag jbhyq or qvssvphyg – hayrff rkcrevrapr bs vaqhfgevnyvmrq naq zvyvgnevmrq ntevphygher unq znqr gurz n yvggyr zber nanepuvp. V ubcr fb. V qba'g xabj.

      From another letter:

      Nf sbe gur Ragjvirf: V qb abg xabj. V unir jevggra abguvat orlbaq gur svefg srj lrnef bs gur Sbhegu Ntr. […] Ohg V guvax va Iby. VV cc. 80-81 [2] vg vf cynva gung gurer jbhyq or sbe Ragf ab er-havba va 'uvfgbel' – ohg Ragf naq gurve jvirf orvat engvbany pengherf jbhyq svaq fbzr 'rneguyl cnenqvfr' hagvy gur ras bg guvf jbeyq: orlbaq juvpu gur jvfqbz arvgure bs Ryirf abe Ragf pbhyq frr. Gubhtu znlor gurl funerq gur ubcr bs Nentbea gung gurl jrer 'abg obhaq sbe rire gb gur pvepyrf bs gur jbeyq naq orlbaq gurz vf zber guna zrzbel.'….

      Ohg V yvxr lbhe nafjre orggre.

      [1] "Lrg urer jr fgvyy ner, juvyr nyy gur tneqraf bs gur Ragjvirf ner jnfgrq: Zra pnyy gurz gur Oebja Ynaqf abj."

      [2] Gur Rag/Ragjvsr fbat gung Gerrorneq fvatf.

  44. atheistsisters says:

    HOW HAVE I LIVED A FRUITFUL, SATISFYING EXISTENCE WITHOUT ENTS OR ENTWIVES OR ENTMAIDENS IN MY BRAIN?

    Good question…. hehe, I don't know why your brother never sat you down, tied you to a chair, and gave you Tolkien to read, but we must be grateful he did not!

  45. Ryan Lohner says:

    Fb, gur Ragf arrqvat gb or pbreprq vagb nggnpxvat Vfratneq vf bar bs gur zber pbagebirefvny zbivr punatrf. Ohg V'z cresrpgyl svar jvgu vg. Vg fgbcf Zreel naq Cvccva sebz fcraqvat gur zbivr nf whfg yhttntr (yvxr Cvccva uvzfrys cbvagrq bhg va gur cerivbhf puncgre) naq znxrf vg yrff pbvapvqragny gung gurl fghzoyr bagb Gerrorneq evtug ng gur gvzr jura gur Ragf jrer tbvat gb nggnpx Vfratneq naljnl.

    • Katarina says:

      Jrer gurl tbvat gb nggnpx Vfratneq naljnl? Gur jnl guvf puncgre vf jevggra, vg frrzf yvxr Gerrorneq fcrpvsvpnyyl pnyyf na Ragzbbg orpnhfr bs jung Zreel naq Cvccva gryy uvz, rira vs ur unq gubhtug nobhg vg orsber.

      • Mandy says:

        Sebz gur gnyx Tnaqnys unq jvgu Nentbea, gur uboovgf zrrgvat Gerrorneq naq gryyvat uvz gurve uvfgbel jnf rffragvny gb gur ragf tbvat gb Vfratneq. Jvgubhg gur vasbezngvba gurl cebivqrq, Gerrorneq jbhyqa'g pnyy gur bgure Ragf gb gur Ragzbbg.

      • Dreamflower says:

        Gung'f nyjnlf gur jnl V gubhtug bs vg gbb. Gurl QVQ vaqrrq chfu Gerrorneq vagb svanyyl npgvat– ohg abg dhvgr fb oyngnagyl boivbhf nf va gur zbivrf. Zhpu nf V ybir gur zbivrf, fhogyrgl jnf abg CW'f fgebat cbvag.

        • castlewayjay says:

          gung'f jung V'ir nyjnlf gubhtug – gung gur Ragf arrqrq guvf "chfu". ohg vg jnf greevoyl ha-fhogyr va gur svyzf

    • clodia_risa says:

      Vg’f bar bs gur punatrf gung V’z abg cnegvphyneyl sbaq bs. V guvax vg punatrf gur punenpgre bs gur Ragf naq, gb fbzr rkgrag, qbrfa’g znxr frafr. Gurl qba’g znxr hc gurve zvaqf dhvpxyl naq gurl fgvpx ol jung gurl qrpvqr…hagvy va n zbzrag bs entr, gurl grne qbja Vfratneq. Nyfb, nccneragyl nyy gur Ragf sbyybjrq Gerrorneq hc gurer?

      Ubjrire, V guvax vg jnf fgvyy n tbbq pubvpr. V guvax gurl pbhyq unir qbar gur znepu nccebcevngryl, ohg V’z abg pregnva. Rzbgvbanyyl, vg svg irel jryy jvguva gur erfg bs gur aneengvir. Vg sbyybjf gebcrf gung Ubyyljbbq ybirf gb hfr zhpu orggre. V guvax gung vg jbexf jvguva gur pbagrkg bs gur zbivr, ohg V infgyl cersre gur bevtvany cybg. (Guvf fhzf hc zl srryvatf ba gur punatrf jvgu Snenzve’f punenpgre nf jryy, ol gur jnl.)

  46. stellaaaaakris says:

    I find it really interesting how you can divide almost all of yesterday's comments into one of two categories: racism and squealing over Pippin/Billy Boyd (<3 <3 <3) and Merry/Dominic Monaghan (<3 <3). What different extremes.

    Anyway, onto Treebeard! Let me say this first: I don't hate Treebeard. I actually love him. He's pretty much a giant talking, mobile tree who looks like a giant carrot according to some sources. That's cool. But I find this chapter a bit boring. It feels a little bit like the cave chapters in THG, except those were about 9 pages long. The action just stops. Our characters have been running for the past 75 pages. And then, bam! Forest wall, full stop. Let's stand around and talk for ages. It's part of the reason I dislike Tom Bombadil in FotR. Everything stops when he's around and it drags me out of the moment. And all the songs! Why are these characters always singing? (At least Treebeard doesn't refer to himself in the third person – I find Tom incredibly annoying if you can't tell.) But I find this chapter infinitely preferable. For one, we're moving again by the end. And Treebeard>>>>>>>>>>>>>Tom Bombadil.

    Summary: I adore Treebeard, but I wish it could have been a slightly faster paced chapter. I had a fast pace that I wasn't ready to part ways with yet.

    But let's take a look at Ralph Bakshi's idea of Treebeard:
    <img src="http://periannath.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/lotrbakshi26.jpg"&gt;
    And a closeup for maximum carrotyness:
    <img src="http://www.cedmagic.com/featured/tolkien/lotr-3-1134-treebeard-id-2.jpg"&gt;
    Edit: That second image isn't showing up and I'm at work so I can't find it again. It was a picture of Treebeard's face and it was really orange and his leaves looked like carrot tops.

  47. platoapproved says:

    Even before I read this as a kid, I remember that my grandfather would always refer to himself as an ent/ say we made him feel like one, and I had no idea wtf an ent even was, until I got to this chapter. And then it made a whole lot of sense to me, because he was also very tall and very slow and didn't like bending very much, and he also did a lot of hooming and humming and had a very deep voice, and he watched all of us hasty children running around with vague, kind amusement.

    So Treebeard has always and probably will always make me think of him. /cool story bro

    Basically, I adore everything about this chapter, it's probably my favorite in The Two Towers because TREEBEARD. And something GOOD finally happening to Merry and Pippin…. well, to ANY of the main characters, really.

  48. Rheinman says:

    Of Mark's list, #5 seems the most likely. I, too, would like a moleskin overcoat with lots of nice deep pockets for storing pink umbrellas, and birthday cakes, and philosophers stones, and whatnot. If anybody has a line on that, please let us know.

  49. flootzavut says:

    Would it be tooooo cheesy to say Mark still Ent prepared?? 😉

  50. Ryan Lohner says:

    There have actually been many people, especially since the movies, who accuse things like the Ents marching off to attack Isengard as giving the story a pro-war message. How they can possibly think someone who fought in one of the most pointless and wasteful wars in history, where almost all his friends died, could give that message is beyond me.

    The thing that really gives it context is that while Tolkien was writing this, World War II was going on, and in stark contrast to World War I, stopping the Nazis was unquestionably something that made going to war justified. And all three of his sons were fighting in it, with Tolkien knowing full well what awaited them…

    • castlewayjay says:

      of course a lot of people respond to the Treebeard Chapter by accusing Tolkien of being a treehugging environmentalist!

      and I like/agree with your post.

      • wahlee says:

        Well, he kind of was. 🙂 He disliked industrialization and felt the natural world was much more real than a world full of metal (and if he were alive today, he'd also add plastic). He longed for the idyllic days of his youth, and he tried to recreate those days in the Shire.

        • Dreamflower says:

          One occasion on which he got very upset was waking one morning to find a neighbor had cut down a tree in her yard for nothing more than as he put it, "the crime of being large and alive". It made him highly indignant and angry, and he responded by writing his only allegory, "Leaf by Niggle", which was caused by dreaming of that tree. The funny thing is, though, that "Leaf by Niggle" has far more to do with his own literary frustration than about trees…

          • wahlee says:

            I love "Leaf by Niggle," but technically speaking it isn't his only allegory– he wrote a lovely (short; I guess you might just call it a parable) one in "The Monsters and the Critics" about how the literary critics of his day were picking apart Beowulf only for its links to Anglo-Saxon history and/or philology and failing to appreciate it properly as a work of art.

            • Dreamflower says:

              I only just got "The Monsters and the Critics" for Christmas, along with a couple of books about Tolkien. I haven't had the chance to read it yet, though I am looking forward to it.

      • calimie says:

        Now I'm picturing Tolkien walking around and hugging all the trees. Which he'd totally do.
        Gurer'f nyfb ubj Fnehzna qnzntrf gur Fuver nsgre guvf, phggvat qbja uhaqerqf bs gerrf.

        In the Silmarillion, gurer'f n pyrne zrffntr bs cebpynvzvat angher nf fhcrevbe gb grpuabybtl. Pensgf ner tbbq naq terngyl inyhrq ohg gurl pna pneel pbafrdhraprf vs gurl ner tvira zber vzcbegnapr guna yvivat perngherf.
        (V'yy nyjnlf fgna sbe lbh, Nhyr, ohg V ybirq gung Lninaan orttrq Reh sbe gur Ragf gb cebgrpg ure gerrf sebz lbhe Qjneirf.

    • flootzavut says:

      Seriously??! Crazy. 😮

    • msw188 says:

      I just want to point out the key idea, that you yourself acknowledge. I don't think Tolkien was "pro-war" (who would claim they are "pro-war" anyway?), but at the same time I think Tolkien was not a pure pacifist either. At least in terms of his crafting of Middle Earth, war is often justified and necessary because of the existence of pure evil. The closest thing to a pacifist we get is Tom Bombadil (I talked about this a bit back there), and he is clearly portrayed as being very benign, but ultimately powerless in the face of an enemy who is willing to use force to achieve his ends.

      As for the Ents, this example doesn't say a whole lot either way. The Ents only march to war because they feel their end is at hand anyway, and they might be able to help others. On the other hand, we have seen the men of the Rohirrim SINGING SONGS while killing orcs.

  51. MrsGillianO says:

    Giggling for exactly the same reason as everyone else. CAPSLOCKS comments FTW.

    So NOT prepared.

  52. Eefje says:

    Mark, this review gave me soooo much joy to read!
    I'm tired, and every system at my work is sluggish and the weather is very very grey and yet I am happy because I'm thinking about your love for Treebeard and lots of puppies!

    Whenever something goes wrong, I will just mentally go to Fangorn with Mark and a bunch of puppies! PUPPIES AND ENTS!

  53. monkeybutter says:

    Aww, your ent-caps bring me joy. Treebeard has just about the best introduction ever:

    'Almost felt you liked the Forest! That’s good! That’s uncommonly kind of you,’ said a strange voice. ‘Turn round and let me have a look at your faces. I almost feel that I dislike you both, but do not let us be hasty. Turn around!'

    I love a snarky tree.

    THIS ENT IS NAMED TREEBEARD. IT IS ALSO KNOWN AS FANGORN. IT IS ALSO KNOWN AS OUR TRUE LORD AND SAVIOR. JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW THAT.

    Does this make us druids? If so, can my robe be made of that awesome elf fabric?

    Anyway, I'm glad you liked this chapter. It was so long. Is Treebeard a winking self-insert, because my god, he knows everything and talks forever. I've made it through songs by elves and dwarves and hobbits and men, but my eyes glazed over trying to read the entsong. It took me several tries to get through it. Don't get me wrong, I love the ents! They're really informative, and I like the insight into how even the elves have changed from the old ways, and how their sense of time affects their behavior/mentality. But it reminded me of talking to my grandfather. Really interesting, but eventually my brain shuts down. I feel bad for not appreciating that knowledge, but I just don't have the attention span for ents. Can I pretend that's a good encapsulation of the conflict between the old world and the modern one?

  54. Leah-san says:

    JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? QNZA VG, GUNG’F ABG UBJ GUVF JBEXF, OHG JUNGRIRE.

    V PNA'G. Gung'f rknpgyl ubj vg jbexf, Znex.
    <img src="http://i44.tinypic.com/1z6r4ec.gif"&gt;

  55. Delta1212 says:

    Naq V gubhtug Znex'f pbzzrag ba abg trggvat n anzrq Bep jnf shaal. Ur vf ba n ebyy urer.

    • flootzavut says:

      Ab jbeq bs n yvr! Vg'f nabgure bs gubfr cbvagf jurer vg'f nyzbfg yvxr… ab… lbh qvqa'g whfg fnl gung!

  56. Fiona says:

    More great world building from Tolkien. I like how it gives a bit of a breather from all of the stress and death of recent chapters, kind of like Lothlorien did in the last book. Of course, unlike Tom Bombadil this is actually relevant to the overall plot (I never got him somehow, sorry) of the whole story in fact.

    Roll on next chapter, for which Mark is even less prepared than he has been before :D.

    (Sorry about the vagueness of my comments. I want to get involved but my copy of it is currently in a different county and I can't get it right now so they'll have to stay vague until I can get to the library.)

  57. Mandy says:

    I'VE HAD SO MUCH FEELINGS READING THIS REVIEW

    I should probably be quiet now, because I can't help myself ohg RKCYBQR JVGU WBL XABJVAT GUNG UR JVYY QVFPBIRE FBBA GUNG TNAQNYS VF NYVIR!!

    Also, Treebeard! Or 'Barbávore' how we call him in Portuguese! so much love :))))

    • flootzavut says:

      Oohhhhhhhh I like the Portuguese version 😀

      • Mandy says:

        😀
        The funny thing is that in portuguese tree = árvore and beard = barba, but when you go in Google Translator, it actually translates Treebeard as Barbávore, just like it is in the books! Just to blow my mind how big Tolkien books are everywhere!

        • flootzavut says:

          Love it 😀

          I think with the overlap between Tolkien nerds and internet nerds, those things crop up in some wonderfully unexpected places.

          Try going to google maps and asking for directions from The Shire to Mordor on foot…

          (I tried to do a direct link to the search results but I can't make it work…)

          • Mandy says:

            I tried, but it doesn't appear nothing to me here 🙁

            • flootzavut says:

              🙁 that's a shame. If you ask for directions from The Shire to Mordor (and there are places called both, and it doesn't seem to matter which ones you use), on foot, it has a little note saying:

              Walking directions are in beta.
              Use caution – One does not simply walk into Mordor.

              I love that 😀

        • calimie says:

          LOL Google, that's great.
          It doesn't seem to work with Spanish (Bárbol, very similar to Portuguese) but Quickbeam does translate as Ramaviva. 😀

          • Mandy says:

            It's really similar!
            In portuguese Ramaviva = Tonquesperto , 'tonque' maybe meaning 'tronco'? hahaha
            Now I'm having fun seeing which names google will translate to portuguese version!

            • Juliana Moreli says:

              Portugal portuguese or Brasil portuguese??? Barbavore was a really great translation…better than Valfenda (Rivendell)…
              after reading "Valfenda" I just jumped to the english version lol

              PS: Valfenda – Vale+fenda – crack in the valley…

              • Mandy says:

                Brazilian portuguese ^^
                I'm afraid my english isn't good enough to read all the trilogy in english, but I pretty liked the names translations, with some exceptions 😀
                Are you from Portugal?

  58. castlewayjay says:

    Another thing I forgot to say – When the hobbits wonder what the Ents can do against Saruman, Treebeard reminds them trolls were made in imitation of Ents. poor imitations. Ents are strong.
    and the forest moving…love it.

    • rabidsamfan says:

      *glances at third rail*
      *decides most people are pretty much done by now, so it might be safe*
      *points out that Treebeard also mentions that Orcs are imitations of Elves*
      *shouts ORCS GOT POINTY EARS! and flees in terror*

  59. Noybusiness says:

    The Wikipedia page picture for "Ent": "Treebeard and Hobbits" by Tom Loback
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:TREEBEARD.jpg

  60. Lugija says:

    Nsgre ernqvat gur raq bs guvf puncgre, V ghearq gb gur arkg cntr, naq sbhaq Nentbea, Yrtbynf naq Tvzyv. Naq cerggl zhpu Ab!'q nybhq. Jul jbhyq lbh punatr gur cbvag bs ivrj abj?

    Gura V fnvq gb zlfrys gung "Vg'f cebonoyl whfg gjb puncgref, gura jr'yy trg onpx gb gur ragf nggnpxvat Fnehzna'f sbegerff jvgu Zreel naq Cvccva."

    Ohg vg jnf sbhe puncgref. V'z abg fnlvat V qvqa'g rawbl puncgref 5-8, ohg jura puncgre 8 (anzrq Gur Ebnq gb Vfratneq) fgvyy qvqa'g trg zr gb gur nggnpx, V sryg n yvggyr orgenlrq, univat gb ernq nobhg gur bgure punenpgref evqvat gb Vfratneq, jura V jnagrq gb or gurer nyernql.

    V qba'g erzrzore jung V svefg sryg jura gur nggnpx jnf gbyq va n synfuonpx, ohg abj V ernyyl yvxr vg. Vg tvirf vg n avpr uboovg-ivrj.

    • calimie says:

      Lrnu, ba gur bar unaq vg fhpxf ohg ba gur bgure vg'f terng gb svaq Zreel naq Cvccva jrypbzvat gurz jvgu tbbq sbbq naq gbonppb.

      Nyfb; vg trgf hf snfgre gb RBJLA!

    • Zoli says:

      Lrnu, V guvax V ernq bar puncgre bs gur N/T/Y fghss naq gura V fxvccrq fgenvtug gb gur puncgre jurer gurl nyy zrrg hc va Vfratneq. Orpnhfr jung vf zber njrfbzr guna nccebnpuvat Fnehzna'f gbjre naq svaqvat gjb uboovgf puvyyvat naq fzbxvat cvcrjrrq? ABGUVAT.

      Riraghnyyl V jrag onpx naq ernq nobhg Uryz'f Qrrc, ohg lrnu, gur zbivr znqr gung ovg jnl zber vagrerfgvat.

    • castlewayjay says:

      fb pbby gb trg gur uboovg cbvag bs ivrj jura jr svanyyl trg gb gur ragf' qrfgehpgvba bs Vfratneq

  61. Alberthe says:

    I LOVE TREEBEARD SO MUCH THAT I ALMOST CHEATED AND READ THIS CHAPTER YESTERDAY BECAUSE I WAS SO LOOKING FORWARD TO IT AND I AM SO HAPPY THAT YOU LOVE HIM TOO BECAUSE HE IS THE BEST<3<3<3

    That is all.

  62. thimbledore says:

    NHTU. LBH THLF, ZNEX VF TBVAT GB FUVG N TBYQRA OEVPX JURA TNAQNYS PBZRF ONPX. Bu zl tbq, guvf vf fb nznmvat. V nz fb rkpvgrq. Cyrnfr, Fnagn Tnaqnys, yrg guvf unccra jvgubhg Znex trggvat fcbvyrq – V'ir orra rire fb tbbq guvf lrne. Cyrnfr vtaber gung gur gur lrne vf bayl 26 qnlf byq. V UNIR ORRA TBBQ.

    Fb ur whfg qvq n pncfybpx puncgre sbe Ragf. Jung gur onpx-syvccvat uryy vf ur tbvat gb qb sbe gur erghea bs Tnaqnys? Jung vf pncfybpxvre guna pncfybpx? V cerqvpg gur zbgure bs nyy TVS jnyyf.

  63. Dreamflower says:

    I am so glad that you love Treebeard!

    And I have to say, your image of a puppy avalanche is one of the best metaphors for joyful squee-ishness that I have ever seen in my life! I will adore that image of you burrowed in puppies (in my imagination they are all little bitty Jack Russell Terriers) forever and ever!

    Also: " BU TNAQNYS, V FREVBHFYL ZVFF LBH NAQ LBHE FNFFL JVMNEQ NQIVPR. JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP? "

    Bwahahahahaha!!!

  64. flootzavut says:

    Didin't even have to ROT13 that – which is slightly disturbing…

  65. gonzoron says:

    I love Treebeard too, and I agree with what Peter Jackson said in one of the commentary tracks that he should make a spin-off TV series with Treebeard as a detective, solving crimes…. slowly. I'd totally watch that.

  66. Ryan Lohner says:

    Just a bit more movie stuff:

    Wnpxfba nccneragyl pna'g trg rabhtu bs ubj obevat Gerrorneq vf, naq xrcg gelvat gb cynl vg hc va gur svyz, bayl sbe rqvgbe Zvxr Ubegba (n irgrena bs uvf pensg jub jnf phggvat svyzf onpx jura Wnpxfba jnf va ryrzragnel fpubby) gb xrrc erzvaqvat uvz gung gurl fubhyqa'g jnag gur nhqvrapr gb or oberq. Naq ur jnagf gb tvir Gerrorneq uvf bja fcvabss qrgrpgvir fubj! "Ur fbyirf pevzrf, irel fybjyl."

    V nqber gur zbzrag jura Gerrorneq cebhqyl gryyf Zreel naq Cvccva gung gur Ragf unir nterrq…gurl ner abg Bepf. Naq gura gur pbzovangvba bs Zreel'f ubeebe ng ubj zhpu ybatre guvf vf tbvat gb gnxr, naq Cvccva abg dhvgr trggvat vg naq fnlvat "Jryy, gung'f tbbq arjf."

  67. threerings13 says:

    This is the best review ever. I'm with you, Mark. There is nothing about Ents and this chapter that is not glorious.

    On this reading I was thinking about Tolkien the linguist, walking in the woods, wondering what kind of language trees would have.

    Nyfb, Znex vf trggvat guvf ernyyl hapnaal novyvgl gb znxr pbzzragf gung qverpgyl eryngr gb gur arkg puncgre. BZT, V pna'g jnvg gvyy gbzbeebj.

  68. @RadagastWiz says:

    I realize it's not a fun time and things are all foreboding, but I LOVE the war-chant at the end. "We go, we go, we go to war, to hew the stone and break the door!"

    Goosebumps every time, man. Great stuff.

    • calimie says:

      Yes, I usually skip songs but that one is amazing and I always read it.

    • Zoli says:

      YES. In addition to being pure awesome, the Ents are also FUCKING BADASS.

      I would not want to be on the other end of their attack. D:

      The only thing more epic would probably be Gurbqna'f fcrrpu ng gur Cryraabe Svryqf. "N oybbq qnl, n erq qnl, rer gur fha evfrf!"

    • ZeynepD says:

      To land of gloom with tramp of doom, with roll of drum, we come, we come;
      To Isengard with doom we come! With doom we come, with doom we come!

      This is the closest the English language comes to actual war drums. Item #738 in the list of evidence for "Tolkien had a great ear for just pure sound."

    • castlewayjay says:

      some people find the ents to be silly. I don't – and like someone else says, I wouldn't want to be on their bad side.

  69. PrefectSarah says:

    IT'S BEEN A REALLY LONG TIME SINCE WE'VE HAD AN ALL CAPS PARTY!!!

    ENTS ARE THE COOLEST BEINGS EVER, Y'ALL. I JUST LOVE HOW THEY TALK AND ARE SO CHILL. LIKE THEY ALL JUST SMOKED A BUNCH OF PIPE-WEED.

    AND YOU KNOW TREEBEARD IS ONE BAMF!!! 🙂

  70. Hailey says:

    Does everyone here know when and where I started laughing hysterically? Oh my. XD Love you mark, your reviews are fantastic forever and ever.

  71. threerings13 says:

    So, last night I was reading this chapter, and the part about the Rowan trees being cut down made me SO SAD. But it made me think of this story:

    One day I was on my way to work from where I live in rural Texas. They were doing construction on the road, and that meant having to stop and wait for the truck to get to you to lead you through the construction. It was a long wait, and one morning the lady holding the stop sign motioned for me to roll down my window. (This is the country, this kind of thing happens.) She told me that if I turned around and turned onto this side-road, it would lead me right to the main road. I'm a little skeptical of short-cuts when I don't know the roads, but I felt like I HAD to follow her advice now. So I turned down the road and there was literally NOTHING there. Trees, road, nothing else. After a while the road dead-ended onto another road and I had to turn left or right. She had not mentioned anything about there being turns involved. I chose incorrectly and ended up running out of road after almost 20 minutes of wandering. So I turned back, already late for work. And that's when I found this:
    <img src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-E21Manp7Uv0/TyF7bHxqASI/AAAAAAAABNs/NaWABrqTKr8/s400/110515_142442.jpg&quot; height="300" width="400" />

    At the time it was early morning and foggy and I was almost sure I was hallucinating that there was a giant tree coming out of the middle of the road. And so, reading this chapter, I thought about the time when someone was making a road, and instead of chopping down the gorgeous tree right in the middle, they just built the road around it and stuck a reflector on the tree.

    • monkeybutter says:

      That's amazing. Also a little dangerous, but mostly amazing.

      • threerings13 says:

        That's pretty much exactly what my reaction was when I found it. After "WTF WHY IS THERE A TREE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD?"

    • castlewayjay says:

      nice. thanks so for posting this

    • hpfish13 says:

      We have one of these in the middle of my hometown, but it's an oak tree and it's actually right in the middle of one lane, but it's on a dead end street, so people just deal with it.

    • Tauriel_ says:

      That looks awfully dangerous… Couldn't they have just built the road slightly around it? This is an accident (or two, or three, or a dozen…) waiting to happen…

      Plus, I'd like to see the insurance company that would believe a claimant who'd say that "there was a tree standing in the middle of the road"… :p

      • threerings13 says:

        Yeah, it's totally dangerous, particularly at night (or when it's foggy and you're lost and all of a sudden there's a freaking TREE in the middle of the road. ) But there's really no reason to be on that road unless you're one of the very small number of people who live back there, and I imagine they know where the tree is.

    • flootzavut says:

      That's pretty damn awesome 😀

    • Becky_J_ says:

      This is AWESOME. I myself recognize the safety hazard, but at the same time, I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT. There are certain places on earth that, when you come across them, you kinda stop and know that very few places like it exist…. this is one of them.

  72. rubyjoo says:

    OK, when you first read the book:

    qvq lbh whfg npprcg gung Tnaqnys jnf qrnq?

    Be qvq lbh guvax gung ur whfg pbhyqa'g or naq lbh jrer jnvgvat sbe fbzr zntvp gb oevat uvz onpx?

    Be, yvxr Znex, qvq lbh JNAG zntvp gb oevat uvz onpx ohg whfg npprcg gung guvf jnf jvfushy guvaxvat?

    Naq, vs lbh gubhtug ur jnf qrnq, qvq lbh ortva gb thrff lbh zvtug or jebat jura, sbe vafgnapr, Gerrorneq ortna gnyxvat nobhg uvz va gur cerfrag grafr.

    Be qvq lbh ortva gb jbaqre nobhg gur byq zna frra yhexvat ba gur sevatrf bs Snatbea (nygubhtu V xabj gung jnf Fnehzna)?

    Fnqyl, V whfg pna'g erzrzore gung sne onpx ohg V'q ybir gb urne nobhg bgure crbcyr'f vzcerffvbaf.

    BTW, I just love this chapter. For the first time in a long time I feel safe.

    • Va er Tnaqnys pbzvat onpx, V unq ab vqrn- V gubhtu ur jnf tbar sbe tbbq. V jnf pbzcyrgryl oybja njnl jura ur fnvq gung ur jnf Tnaqnys. V erzrzore abg oryvrivat vg ng svefg naq gura ehaavat qbja gb gryy zl zbz gung Tnaqnys pnzr onpx. V guvax fur jnf n yvggyr sernxrq bhg ol ubj jvyqyl V jnf ernpgvat. Ohg V qvqa'g fgnl jvgu ure ybat- V whfg ena onpx gb zl ebbz naq fgnegrq qribhevat gur erfg bs gur obbx. Rira erzrzorevat vg vf znxvat zr teva yvxr penml XD

    • Dreamflower says:

      V unq npprcgrq gung Tnaqnys jnf qrnq evtug hc hagvy gur raq bs SbgE, jura Sebqb urneq gur ibvpr fnlvat "Sbby! Gnxr vg bss!" Naq evtug gura V znqr gur yrnc gung znlor Tnaqnys jnf nyvir. V sryg fhpu n oevrs vafgnag bs cher wbl, juvpu V gura vzzrqvngryl fdhnfurq, orpnhfr, jryy, V pbhyq abg guvax bs UBJ ur pbhyq or nyvir.*

      V qvq gel gb gnyx zlfrys bhg bs vg, ohg nf fbba nf V urneq Gerrorneq gnyxvat nobhg Tnaqnys, V ortna gb ubcr bapr zber.

      Bs pbhefr, ba n er-ernq gurer ner ybgf bs pyhrf, yvxr gur Rntyr gur Pbzcnal xrrcf frrvat, ohg n svefg gvzr ernqre jbhyqa'g fcbg gung.

      (*Bs pbhefr V abj ernyvmr gung ur unq orra xvyyrq, ohg jnf er-rzobqvrq orpnhfr ur unq abg svavfurq uvf wbo. Ohg gung jnfa'g hagvy frireny lrnef yngre, nsgre V'q svanyyl ernq gur Fvyz gur svefg gvzr naq sbhaq bhg jung n Jvmneq gehyl jnf va Z-r.)

      • rubyjoo says:

        Two lovely stories, IntrovertedAnalyst and Dreamflower. It's wonderful that your memories are so vivid. I wish I could remember but thanks for sharing.

    • flootzavut says:

      V qba'g guvax vg rira bppheerq gb zr. V fnj gur svefg gjb svyzf orsber ernqvat gur obbx (V tbg fghpx va gur Cebybthr nf n puvyq naq fnqyl ab bar rire gbyq zr vg jnf BX gb fxvc vg, fb V jngpurq zbivr 1, ernq obbx 1 gung jrrx, gura fnj zbivr 2 ng gur pvarzn). V unq AB vqrn, naq rfcrpvnyyl jvgu gung ibvpr oyraq guvat V guvax V cerggl zhpu qvqa'g ernyvfr gur juvgr jvmneq jnf Tnaqnys gvyy Nentbea, Tvzyv naq Yrttl qvq.

      Fb jura v svefg ernq vg, V xarj, orpnhfr V'q frra vg gur cerivbhf jrrxraq ng gur pvarzn! V qba'g erzrzore jung vg jnf yvxr gb ernq – V qvq fcrrq guebhtu gur obbxf fb snfg gur svefg gvzr ebhaq, orpnhfr V whfg UNQ gb xabj jung unccrarq – V jnf obeebjvat rnpu ibyhzr sebz n sevraq naq V unq gb jnvg n qnl be gjb orsber ur'q svavfurq EbgX naq V ernq vg nyzbfg aba fgbc bapr V tbg zl unaqf ba vg 🙂

      • rubyjoo says:

        Well, I'm also very interested in hearing a response to the film.

        Jvgu fb znal fubgf bs Tnaqnys va gur genvyref sbe gur frpbaq svyz, V gubhtug vg jbhyq or n qbar qrny gung rirelbar xarj gung Tnaqnys unq fheivirq. Terng gb urne gung lbh unq n jbaqreshy fhecevfr. V'z ubcvat gung Znex vf fvzvyneyl gnxra nonpx naq gung ur qbrfa'g thrff sebz nyy gur yvggyr uvagf gung unir orra tvira. Naq V ubcr gung ur'f UBARFG nobhg abg thrffvat engure guna cergraqvat vaabprapr evtug hagvy gur ynfg zbzrag vs ur jbexf guvatf bhg orsber gur ovt erirny whfg gb cyrnfr hf – orpnhfr jr fb ybir vg jura ur'f abg cercnerq, YBY!

        • flootzavut says:

          For some reason I can't find your post – argh – so I hopereply-by-email works :)V gevrq gb ernq gur obbxf nf n puvyq, univat nqberq Gur Uboovg, ohg Vtbg fghpx va gur cebybthre naq fnqyl unq ab bar gb gryy zr V pbhyqfxvc gung ovg!V jrag jvgu gur vagragvba gb frr svyz bar jura vg pnzr bhg, ohg gurfrngf jrer nyy obbxrq hc, naq V qba'g guvax V rire fnj rira n genvyresbe gung. Jura svyz 2 pnzr bhg V unq sevraqf jub gbyq zr V UNQ gb tbjvgu gurz, naq gurl fng zr qbja naq unq zr jngpu SbgE; fb onfvpnyyl, Vjngpurq SbgE bar Fngheqnl, ernq SbgE gung jrrx, naq gura fnj GGG gursbyybjvat Fngheqnl. V'ir ab vqrn vs V rire fnj nal bs gur genvyref sbeGGG orsber frrvat gur zbivr, ohg vs V qvq, gurl zrnag abguvat gb zr nggur gvzr. Fb zl ernpgvba gb Tnaqnys ernccrnevat jung onfvpnyyl “Jung??JUNG??? LNLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!” 😀

  73. Meenalives says:

    Treebeard for President is the only thing in the universe that could make me vote Republican.

  74. Tauriel_ says:

    Propaganda summary of the Ents' march on Isengard:

    Eco-terrorists plan an unprovoked attack on a thriving industrial site that provides employment for hundreds.

    :p

  75. Starsea28 says:

    TREEBEARD IS MY FAVOURITE LOTR CHARACTER.

    FINALLY I GET TO SAY IT.

    Oh gosh, yes, Entwives. All the sadness!

  76. samyouare says:

    "1) NO LETTER FOR HOGWARTS

    2) NO TARDIS

    3) I CAN’T BEND THE ELEMENTS

    4) I’M NOT TEXT MESSAGE BUDDIES WITH DANA SCULLY, AMY POEHLER, OR MICHELLE OBAMA.

    5) I DON’T OWN A COAT LIKE HAGRID’S"

    …my life has revealed itself as meaningless. |:

    • Geolojazz says:

      For me, it's the lack of a portal gun that causes me utter despair.

    • Dreamflower says:

      I have no transporter.

      And no matter how much I wiggle my nose or fold my arms and blink my eyes, nothing ever happens because of it. (I'm a Boomer, what can I say.)

  77. Diddle-de-dum says:

    Wow, Mark, wow! I mean I thought you'd like Ents, but… wow. Just so you know, you will NEVER STOP SEEING ENTS wherever you go where there are trees.
    (Really the best warning to give anyone reading LotR for the first time is that walks will never be the same again. And I love that.)

    "IT’S SUCH A GLORIOUS MOMENT TO HAVE THE ENTS TAKE A LARGER PART IN THE STORY, AND I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE HOW THIS PANS OUT."

    Hoom, now, Mark, don't be hasty.

    • calimie says:

      you will NEVER STOP SEEING ENTS wherever you go where there are trees.

      Better Ents than the Slenderman.

    • CoyoteSister says:

      Just so you know, you will NEVER STOP SEEING ENTS wherever you go where there are trees.

      Yes! This chapter was part of the reason I started talking to trees! I actually read a significant portion of this book sitting in a tree, this old crab-apple behind my grandparents' house, and after this chapter it just made everything so much cooler.

  78. acityofdoors says:

    TREEBEARD, FUCK YEAH!

    That's pretty much all I have to say about this chapter!

  79. Wheelrider says:

    Vf nalbar ryfr fgnegvat gb or noyr gb ernq plcurerq grkg, sebz nyy gur ercrngrq dhbgvat bs PREGNVA YVARF BS ZNEX'F CBFG?

    Hope Mark isn't.

    (DUDE! YOU ARE SO UNPREPARED!)

    • Dreamflower says:

      Yes.

      • Juliana Moreli says:

        same here lol

        • flootzavut says:

          and me 🙂

          Ohg V guvax gung'f ynetryl orpnhfr jr fcraq n ybg bs gvzr qrplcurevat vg – V guvax hayrff lbh ner sberire hagnatyvat vg, lbh jbhyqa'g abgvpr gubfr cnggreaf, vs gung znxrf frafr.

          Gung fnvq, V unir gevrq gb ersrerapr gur Ovt T vf nf znal qvssrerag jnlf gung ner abg uvf npghny anzr nf V pna!!

          • rabidsamfan says:

            Gbb gehr! Naq rfcrpvnyyl jura vg pbzrf gb bhe snibevgr jvmneq. V'z pbafgnagyl gelvat gb ercuenfr guvatf fb gung gurl'er abg nqqvat gb gur pyhrf bs ubj gb ernq ebgguvegrra. Vg'f xvaq bs sha!

            • AmandaNekesa says:

              Jryy, jvgu gbzbeebj'f puncgre, jr jba'g unir gb jbeel nobhg chggvat bhe snibevgr jvmneq'f anzr va pbqr. V pna'g jnvg!

            • flootzavut says:

              It IS fun – I'm glad it's not just me. Vg jvyy or n eryvrs abg gb unir gb ebg nal zber yngre gbqnl ohg V zhfg pbasrff, V engure yvxr pnyyvat uvz Ovt T, naq jvyy or grzcgrq gb qb gung rira jura Znex xabjf gur fpber…

  80. castlewayjay says:

    Just paid attention to Mark's last paragraph – seeing as how Treebeard is such an environmentalist, I think he'd likely be a Democrat. Or better a member of a Green Party

  81. VoldieBeth says:

    Every time I see a key sentence that is a title for the soundtrack I have to listen to that song. Mark, if you loved Bear McCreary then you are going to propose marriage to Howard Shore! You are probably going to have to go out and buy all the soundtracks and make separate posts about how good the music is for the movies. Best music EVER!!!

    • castlewayjay says:

      seconded – best movie music ever. after I read these reviews I go around humming themes from the films.

    • Dreamflower says:

      Every time I get a bit upset with PJ for things he changed, I remind myself he chose Howard Shore to write the score, and forgive him for everything.

      • rabidsamfan says:

        Yes indeed. That and giving so much of the production design etc., to Weta, and bringing in John Howe an Alan Lee. I love watching the appendices to the extended editions because you can see how much love got poured into the making of the movies.

    • flootzavut says:

      YES. I can't *not* hear that in my head whenever Ents are mentioned…

  82. Appachu says:

    I strongly suspect that Treebeard might object to being called "cute". But it's all right, Mark, because I would totally do that too.

    Also.

    JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP?

    BU TBQ. QLVAT. Whfg….pbzcyrgryl naq hggreyl va njr ng lbhe hajvggvat cerfpvrapr. Gurer ner ab jbeqf.

  83. Milla says:

    YES!!! MARK YOU ARE HAVING THE EXACT SAME REACTION AS I HAVE EVERY TIME I READ THIS CHAPTER!!! WHICH IS MY FAVOURITE THIS FAR IN THE BOOK!!

    There is not a single thing in this chapter that I do not absolutely love <3 Treebeard and Bregalad may very well be my favourite characters of all time! I always come along too late to contribute with much in the comments (usually everything I wanted to say is already said, but it has to be this way as the only time I have during the day to do this is during my daughter's nap time).

    I'll just enclose one of my favourite quotes from this chapter before I'm on my way again:

    'Bregalad stood for some time surveying the hobbits solemnly; and they looked at him, wondering when he would show any signs of 'hastiness''

    Hihi. This makes me giggle every time!

  84. cretey says:

    One of the things that really piques my interest about Fangorn more than the other forests we've seen is I really get the sense of distinct *neighborhoods* to it, the darker parts, the slopes, the piece near the last mountain, Quickbeam's home area, etc. As opposed to Mirkwood in the Hobbit, which we just walked through (with a slight detour to a dungeon), or Lothlorien, where the focus is on the elven centre.

    I would love to see a detailed map of Fangorn specifically. Or even better, go myself and make one. 😉

    • flootzavut says:

      I think it's really interesting to see Fangorn from the Ents POV – they don't make many distinction between all these two legged creatures, but to them there's no such thing as "just" trees or "just" forest…

  85. elyce says:

    CAPSLOCK PARTY!!!!!

    FINALLY MARK! IT'S BEEN FOREVER SINCE WE'VE HAD ONE!!! I KNEW THE ENTS WOULD BRING IT OUT IN YOU. AS FOR ME, I LOVE THEIR WAR MARCHING SONG. IT'S SO AWESOME!

  86. floppus says:

    The Spoiler-Free Map of Middle-Earth

    Normal, blurred

    We've heard plenty of rumors about Fangorn Forest; in this chapter we get to see what it's really like inside. The places mentioned in this chapter aren't marked on the map, but we can guess. Methedras is presumably the tall mountain with three peaks, just to the right of the "Isengard" label.

    Judging by the map scale, an entstride appears to be about 6 or 7 feet.

    • msw188 says:

      The mindblowing thing about this comment is that an entstride of about 6 or 7 feet MAKES PERFECT SENSE

    • BetB says:

      I think Treebeard mentions that when he takes Pippen and Merry back to Wellinghall, he walks about 27000 ent strides (did I remember this right?). Generally, a person's stride is about half their height (1 yard for a 6 foot tall person). I thought I'd guess that Treebeard's strides are about 7 feet. Do the math and you get about 35.8 miles ((17000 strides x 7 feet) / 5280). I think that is in the ballpark for the map as drawn.

      • BetB says:

        Um, I messed up my equation. I was trying to remember whether it was 17000 or 27000 Ent strides. I changed it to 27000 on the calculator but didn't change it in my comments above. The equation should read:
        ((27000 strides x 7 feet) / 5280 feet) = 35.8 miles.

  87. SecretGirl127 says:

    ILOVE THAT YOU FELT THE NEED TO EXPRESS YOUR ENT ENTERTAINMENT IN ALL CAPS FOR THE ENTIRE POST.

  88. arctic_hare says:

    YAAAAAAAAAAAAY CAPSLOCK PARTY

    THIS CHAPTER IS AWFULLY LONG AND DRAGGED A BIT FOR ME AT TIMES, BUT I NEVERTHELESS LOVE TREEBEARD AND THE ENTS AND FANGORN. I WANNA GO WALKING WITH AN ENT, THAT WOULD MAKE ME SO HAPPY. AND MORE MERRY AND PIPPIN IS ALWAYS AWESOME. <3

    "BU TNAQNYS, V FREVBHFYL ZVFF LBH NAQ LBHE FNFFL JVMNEQ NQIVPR. JUL PNA’G LBH WHFG ZNTVPNYYL PBZR ONPX JVGU NSGREYVSR ZNTVP"

    WHFG JNVG GVYY GBZBEEBJ. RIRELGUVAT JVYY OR BXNL.

    Movie stuffs: Guvf vf nabgure nern jurer V yvxr gur zbivr irefvba zber, sbe n srj ernfbaf:

    1) Gur fprar jurer Gerrorneq qvfpbiref gur qrfgeblrq cbegvba bs gur sberfg vf urnegoernxvat. Wbua Eulf-Qnivrf' qryvirel bs gur "Znal bs gurfr gerrf jrer zl sevraqf…" yvarf vf whfg cresrpg. Naq gur znepu bs gur Ragf gbjneqf Vfratneq vf whfg fb fgveevatyl ornhgvshy.

    2) GUR ZHFVP. BU ZL TBBQARFF, GUR ZHFVP. <3 "Vfratneq Hayrnfurq" vf bar bs zl nofbyhgr snibevgr fbatf ba nyy guerr fbhaqgenpxf, naq gung vf fnlvat fbzrguvat. V trg puvyyf naq n ovg zvfgl-rlrq jura gung cneg xvpxf va nf gur Ragf fgneg bss. Rirel gvzr.

    3) Creuncf ZBFG vzcbegnagyl, jr trg gb npghnyyl FRR gur Ragf genfu Vfratneq. Naq vg vf fb, fb fngvfslvat, bar bs gur zbfg fngvfslvat fprarf va NAL zbivr V'ir rire frra. Vg znxrf zr fb tvqql gb jngpu gurz tvir Fnehzna jung'f orra pbzvat gb uvz. Vg'f fb nznmvat.

    • Tauriel_ says:

      Agreed on all points. 🙂 <3

    • hpfish13 says:

      Va cnegvphyne V ybir gur zbzrag jura Fnz'f fcrrpu vf orvat bireynccrq jvgu gur gevhzcunag zbzragf ng Uryz'f Qrrc naq Vfratneq, gung pbhcyrq jvgu gur zhfvp arire snvyf gb znxr zr jrrc.

      Oooo…I found a link!!!

      New readers, don't click, very spoilery http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEMdXhfO-Wk

      • arctic_hare says:

        bzt lrf zr gbb. <3 V ybir gung cneg fb zhpu. V ybir gur anzr bs gur fbat gbb: "Fnzjvfr gur Oenir". SYNJYRFF GVGYR.

      • flootzavut says:

        Bu V YBIR GUNG FB ZHPU.

        Along with all the other things that make this SO WONDERFUL vf Tbyyhz'f ernpgvbaf. Gur ybbx va uvf rlrf, vg'f fb fnq naq fb erny gung vg'f zvaqoybjvat gb guvax ur'f whfg PTV.

        Nyfb V ybir gung jr trg n ovg bs uboovg zhfvp ng gur raq… gurer'f fhpu ubcr va nal gurzr gung'f pbaarpgrq jvgu gur uboovgf va nal jnl.

    • Juliana Moreli says:

      V nterr jvgu lbh va rirelguvat!!! Zbvr irefvba vf zhpu orggre! Gur fbhaqgenpx tvir zr puvyyf rirelgvzr naq V xrrc fvatvat gbtrgure (ab…V qba'g xabj jung vf gung gur tvey vf fvatvat…V vzcebivfr yby)… naq frrvat Vfratneq orvat qrfgeblrq vf nznmvat! Fnehzna trg'f ernyyl znavnp…whfg yvxr gung orne va jbbql jbbqcrpxre pnegbba…yby

      [youtube tCqcPQntrKc http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCqcPQntrKc youtube]

    • flootzavut says:

      Agree so hard on all three points.

      And gung yvar nobhg gur gerrf orvat uvf sevraqf, gung vf ORNHVGSHY… n ornhgvshy yvar, naq gur qryvirel vf nofbyhgryl cresrpg.

  89. emillikan says:

    6) NO TESSERACTING IN REAL LIFE

  90. ZeynepD says:

    Mark finds out about Ents, ALLCAPS and puppy avalanches ensue.

    Best day in Mark Reads ever. 😀

  91. Mauve_Avenger says:

    Bregalad's name in the Common Speech, Quickbeam, is itself one of the common names for the rowan tree. So it would seem that just like beloved Fimbrethil's name means "slender-beech" and Treebeard is implied to have the form of a beech (or possibly oak) tree, Bregalad's love for the rowan trees might also be influenced by his own form.

    Bregalad said that the rowan trees are his favorite members of the race he calls the People of the Rose. So it seems from his comments that the trees of the forest are organized in two ways: by race/taxonomy (the People of the Rose are the family Rosaceae) and by location (Bregalad is one of Skinbark's people, who live in one area that's been heavily attacked by orcs). Of course, it could also be the case that tree location is determined by the trees' race. Maybe instead of anytree living in that area being one of Skinbark's people by definition, Skinbark's people are the Rosaceae and they all live in the same area because that location is more conducive to their growth.

  92. Icarus says:

    The ents are mentioned in Hobbiton. No really, they are.

    In the scene where we first meet Sam, one of the hobbits mentions his cousin spotting a tree walking up in north farthing. "It was as big as an elm tree." — "Then like as not it *was* an elm tree." And then the hobbits speculate on the cousin's drinking habits. Tolkien then distracts us with Sam talking about elves sailing, sailing, never letting on that we're going to see walking trees in due time.

  93. ADB says:

    V'z fhecevfrq Znex unfa'g orra fcbvyrq nyernql ertneqvat "Tnaqnys gur Juvgr." Nf gur ZNQ cnebql bs GG chg vg: "Gurer'f orra yvxr n zvyyvba genvyref fubjvat Vna ZpXryyra jvgu lbh guerr qbbshfrf."

    Nyy gur orggre sbe hf, bs pbhefr, gb frr Znex'f fher-gb-or-fcrpgnphyne ernpgvba!!!

    Bu, naq orggre sbe Znex sbe rkcrevrapvat vg sbe gur svefg gvzr oynu oynu oynu….

  94. Nathan L says:

    I've been listening to the audiobooks instead of reading, and I have to say that Treebeard is just amazing. Robert Inglis captures him perfectly, and with all the work that clearly went into making sure the pronunciations are correct you get an excellent feel of how beautiful and rolling Entish is.

    I'd highly recommend it to anyone.

    • flootzavut says:

      I love how musical and lilting and rolling Entish is. It's longwinded, but it seems like it would also be SOOOOO satisfying to speak…

  95. Hotaru_hime says:

    So yesterday when I joked about getting a pint, I meant a pint of Ent draught.
    FUCK YEAH THE ENTS! FUCK YEAH TREEBEARD!
    I choose to believe there are Entwives out there; I know the canon and I don't care.

  96. Andrew says:

    I

    LOVE

    ENTS.

    The en(t)d.

  97. Katarina says:

    What really happened to the Entwives: http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y124/KattaHj/tre

    (Screencap courtesy of Killcolor.)

  98. Jackie says:

    This is wonderful – the way fanfic ought to be:

    Come Back To me – http://archiveofourown.org/works/307960

  99. Hotaru_hime says:

    I figure you would enjoy this now. http://scifi.icanhascheezburger.com/2012/01/23/sc

Comments are closed.