{"id":895,"date":"2012-03-22T06:00:33","date_gmt":"2012-03-22T13:00:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/?p=895"},"modified":"2012-03-21T18:44:11","modified_gmt":"2012-03-22T01:44:11","slug":"mark-reads-the-lord-of-the-rings-appendices-part-ii","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/2012\/03\/mark-reads-the-lord-of-the-rings-appendices-part-ii\/","title":{"rendered":"Mark Reads ‘The Lord of the Rings’ Appendices: Part II"},"content":{"rendered":"

It seems there’s quite a bit of this book left, so I’m hoping that I can squeeze another post out of these appendices. It’s more apparent to me now that Tolkien had imagined a world so large that massive parts of the story had to appear in appendices<\/em>. Like, holy shit, my brain can’t even process that. THIS UNIVERSE IS IMMENSE. WHAT IS HAPPENING.<\/p>\n

Let’s continue on with more of the Appendices!<\/p>\n

APPENDIX C: Family Trees<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n
Sam founded a family named Gardner<\/em>. That’s just so beautiful to me.<\/li>\n
Oh wait, it’s literally family trees. Oh.<\/li>\n
Why was I surprised by that?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
APPENDIX D: Shire Calendar For Use in All Years<\/strong><\/p>\n
\n
How rad would it be if this allowed you to convert our time to Shire time? I am writing this before turning the page, so this BETTER BE RIGHT.<\/li>\n
OH MY GOD I WAS BORN ON THE 23RD OF WINTERFILTH<\/strong>. Well, okay, that’s not an exact science, BUT YOU CAN’T TAKE THIS FROM ME. That sounds so badass<\/em>.<\/span><\/li>\n
“I am not skilled in these matters, and may have made many errors.” What dude you invented this you literally cannot be wrong about it what<\/em><\/span><\/li>\n
You know, I don’t know that I’m gleaming much information from this, but it’s totally fascinating to me that different cultures in Middle-earth measure time differently based on their society’s perception of the world. THIS IS GOOD I LIKE IT A LOT.<\/li>\n
Okay, I was being harsh on Tolkien. I think it’s kind of neat that this is written as if he truly unearthed the Red Book and other documents, and then composed The Lord of the Rings<\/em>\u00c2\u00a0and The Hobbit<\/em>\u00c2\u00a0as historical storytelling. yes good.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
APPENDIX E: Writing and Spelling<\/strong><\/p>\n
\n
Oh, this is going to be just riveting<\/em>, isn’t it? This man INVENTED LANGUAGES. Oh shit, I’m about to be overwhelmed, aren’t I?<\/li>\n
oh<\/li>\n
oh my god<\/li>\n
oh my god<\/em><\/li>\n
no<\/em><\/li>\n
NO<\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n
MAKE IT STOP<\/li>\n
OKAY I GET IT<\/li>\n
WAIT THERE’S ANOTHER PAGE<\/li>\n
um<\/li>\n
oh my god it’s not ending<\/li>\n
PART II??? oh my god how many parts are there<\/li>\n
“The F\u00c3\u00abanorian Letters” about 0% of my body cares about this<\/li>\n
I know many of you have studied this and I think that’s lovely, but this is not meant for me.<\/li>\n
oh my god there is an alphabet table<\/li>\n
It’s still going.<\/li>\n
There’s a Part ii INSIDE the II. FUCK.<\/li>\n
MORE ALPHABETS. WHAT. WHY. WHY ARE THERE SO MANY.<\/li>\n
(For what it’s worth, it’s clear this man is a goddamn genius. Holy shit.)<\/li>\n
Wait, it’s over? Oh!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
APPENDIX F<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n
\n
oh my god i am losing patience<\/li>\n
language<\/li>\n
an appendix solely about the languages<\/li>\n
there aren’t any fun stories in here are there<\/li>\n
i just turned ten pages and it’s still going<\/li>\n
do i really need to know troll language<\/li>\n
I hope most of you went out to get a copy of Trollhunter<\/em>, by the way. Love that movie.<\/li>\n
i am confused by a section on translation of languages you invented, tolkien.<\/li>\n
wait what if he was actually trying to trick people into believing it was real<\/li>\n
like I met someone on tour who thought House of Leaves<\/em>\u00c2\u00a0was nonfiction<\/li>\n
WHAT IF THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO, TO THIS DAY, BELIEVE IT IS NONFICTION<\/li>\n
OH MY GOD AMAZING<\/li>\n
I skipped a lot of this. Oh well.<\/li>\n
So my Kindle copy of this book has the original printed Index??? WHY IS THIS HERE.<\/li>\n
Oh my god, I just skipped like 50 pages in 5 seconds. I LOVE YOU KINDLE.<\/li>\n
I just realized how ridiculous that sounds because you can just thumb ahead in a book and do the same thing.<\/li>\n
That may be the worst thing I have ever typed, but I’m leaving it there because I deserve to be chastised for it.<\/li>\n
OH MY GOD THERE ARE LOTS OF MAPS. These are the ones Christopher Tolkien finished up, yes?<\/li>\n
oh<\/li>\n
oh my god i finished<\/li>\n
holy shit<\/li>\n
i just finished the book<\/li>\n
what do i do with my life<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
(I’ll have a surprise up tomorrow since I promised three LOTR posts. Y’all ain’t prepared.)<\/p>\n
Mark Links Stuff<\/strong><\/p>\n
– The liveblog for the animated version of The Hobbit<\/em>\u00c2\u00a0is now live!<\/a> It starts at 12:00pm PST on Saturday, March 24th.<\/strong>
\n– Check out\u00c2\u00a0my eBook store<\/a>.\u00c2\u00a0Mark Reads Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets<\/a><\/em>\u00c2\u00a0and\u00c2\u00a0Mark Watches Firefly<\/a><\/em>\u00c2\u00a0are both on sale now.
\n– I now have a\u00c2\u00a0 Lulu storefront<\/a>\u00c2\u00a0where all my previously released eBooks are now available as printed books, including\u00c2\u00a0 a complete edition of\u00c2\u00a0Mark Reads Twilight<\/em><\/a>.
\n– I am going on tour in April\/May to promote Mark Does Stuff in the western half of North America.\u00c2\u00a0Please RSVP for any dates and help find a venue!<\/a>\u00c2\u00a0I need venues in: Los Angeles, San Diego, Phoenix, Salt Lake City, Boise, Spokane, Seattle, and Vancouver.
\n– I am on Twitter:\u00c2\u00a0 @MarkDoesStuff<\/a>
\n-\u00c2\u00a0 I have a Facebook page for Mark Does Stuff<\/a>\u00c2\u00a0that I’m updating regularly. Feel free to like it and spread it to your friends!
\n– I start Mark Reads\u00c2\u00a0The Princess Bride<\/em>\u00c2\u00a0on Monday, March 26th!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It seems there’s quite a bit of this book left, so I’m hoping that I can squeeze another post out of these appendices. It’s more apparent to me now that Tolkien had imagined a world so large that massive parts … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[136],"tags":[118,23,138],"class_list":["post-895","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-the-lord-of-the-rings","tag-jrr-tolkien","tag-mark-reads","tag-mark-reads-the-lord-of-the-rings"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/895","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=895"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/895\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=895"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=895"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=895"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}