{"id":595,"date":"2011-10-10T13:00:27","date_gmt":"2011-10-10T20:00:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/?p=595"},"modified":"2011-10-10T11:41:30","modified_gmt":"2011-10-10T18:41:30","slug":"mark-reads-a-feast-for-crows-predictions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/2011\/10\/mark-reads-a-feast-for-crows-predictions\/","title":{"rendered":"Mark Reads &#8216;A Feast For Crows&#8217;: Predictions"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Well, after the tumultuous experience that was reading <em>A Storm of Swords<\/em>, I still can&#8217;t say that I feel totally prepared for anything to come in this series. These books are BLEAK AS HELL<em>. <\/em>But I will, yet again, make a public fool of myself as I try to predict what will come in the forth book of the <em>A Song of Ice and Fire<\/em> series. Onwards I go!<\/p>\n<p><!--more-->Honestly, bless your hearts. More than any other fandom I&#8217;ve come across, y&#8217;all have been nearly perfect in your ability to laugh and scoff at me without even hinting at spoilers. Thank you, ASOIAF fans! Also, I&#8217;ve heard ~terrible things~ about how racist\/misogynistic the fandom can be at times, but none of y&#8217;all bring that shit around here. MAXIMUM ENJOYMENT FOR ALL. So, shall we laugh at my inability to predict a single thing that George R.R. Martin will write? YES, WE SHALL.<\/p>\n<p><strong>MARK&#8217;S HOPELESS ATTEMPT AT PREDICTING THE EVENTS IN <em>A FEAST FOR CROWS<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Tyrion Lannister is headed for the Wall. Why not meet up with Jon Snow and Stannis Baratheon? He just betrayed the Lannisters in the worst way possible, so it makes sense he&#8217;d head to people he might be of service to.<\/li>\n<li>Okay, I know this is wishful thinking, but if Arya boarded a ship across the Narrow Sea, she will&#8230;.meet Daenarys? PLEASE? I just want a holy union between these badass women and that is all I want from life.<\/li>\n<li>Oh god, SANSA. Look, I am still shocked at the end of A Storm of Swords. I don&#8217;t know how Sansa is going to escape from Littlefinger if they&#8217;re in the Eyre, so my prediction: she finally snaps and kills Petyr Baelish by the end of the book.<\/li>\n<li>DAVOS. My onion knight, i love you dearly. I think that he&#8217;ll be killed by an Other and I will never forgive GRRM for it.<\/li>\n<li>What&#8217;s fascinating about the end of the last book is that, essentially, it&#8217;s really just Stannis and Tommen left. With Stannis at the Wall, I don&#8217;t think there&#8217;s going to be a huge quest for the Iron Throne, so I think Cersei is going to settle in as Regent to rule from King&#8217;s Landing.<\/li>\n<li>Well, I also don&#8217;t think it will be that easy for her, though, because Cersei is&#8230;paranoid? I mean, she is in a general sense, but her brother just killed her father, so I think we will see her lash out at those around her in order to maintain her power. (PS: GOD I LOVE CERSEI SO MUCH.)<\/li>\n<li>We will get a chapter from the perspective of a Tyrell.<\/li>\n<li>We will find out what the HELL happened to Theon Greyjoy. WHERE THE FUCK IS HE.<\/li>\n<li>Okay, I didn&#8217;t get it last time, so I&#8217;m begging for it now: PLEASE, JUST ONE CHAPTER FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF ASHA GREYJOY. <strong>PLEASE.<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Sooooo&#8230;.Catelyn is re-animated, right? She wasn&#8217;t just temporarily alive because that&#8217;s not how it works. I predict we will see her again at least once in the book. WHICH I WOULD LIKE VERY MUCH.<\/li>\n<li>BRIENNE. OH BRIENNE, HOW I LOVE THEE. So, she&#8217;s off to find Sansa. Well, obviously she won&#8217;t, and she won&#8217;t find Arya either because she&#8217;s not even looking in the right place. My prediction is that she actually finds Rickon instead.<\/li>\n<li>WHERE THE FUCK IS RICKON. The forgotten Stark! OMG how hilarious would it be if we get to book seven and all the Starks are dead and Rickon just emerges from a cave and is like I&#8217;M KING OF THE NORTH, FUCKERS. Okay, an actual prediction: We&#8217;ll find out where he is and what he&#8217;s been doing.<\/li>\n<li>ARYA!! I LOVE YOU DEEPLY AS WELL. Oh god, WHAT IS THAT GODDAMN COIN SHE GOT AND WHAT DOES IT DO? Obviously, I predict we find out what that coin means and what that phrase that was spoken back to her means, too.<\/li>\n<li>AND WE WILL SEE J&#8217;AQEN H&#8217;GHAR AGAIN. CALLING IT.<\/li>\n<li>Oh, and Sandor Clegane obviously didn&#8217;t die. CALLING THAT, TOO.<\/li>\n<li>oh god JON SNOW ON THE WALL. omg he&#8217;s fucking LORD COMMANDER AND SHIT. I can&#8217;t even goddamn GUESS what the hell is going on. But let&#8217;s try: Mance Rayder will escape from captivity.<\/li>\n<li>Someone will blow that horn thing that&#8217;s supposed to bring down the wall and it will work.<\/li>\n<li>then disaster<\/li>\n<li>then how will i survive<\/li>\n<li>Okay, seriously. Samwell will lose his virginity to Gilly. I dunno, I&#8217;m sort of feeling them as a couple? I mean, obviously I ship the <em>fuck<\/em> out of Sam\/Jon, but let&#8217;s be real here!<\/li>\n<li>Hi, Jaime. Can we have a moment? I hated you. I did! And something happened during <em>A Storm of Swords<\/em>, and I find myself unbearably fascinated by your character. There&#8217;s a clear division between you and your sister, and I think you&#8217;ll exploit that, eventually betraying her, too. See, the Lannisters will finally fall apart after what they did to the Starks because sometimes, retribution takes a long time to happen.<\/li>\n<li>GENDRY CHAPTER. IT&#8217;S HAPPENING.<\/li>\n<li>Bran, you are in hiding. What are you doing? I have not the slightest damn clue what&#8217;s happening to him. Um&#8230;.he will&#8230;um&#8230;.nope. I have nothing. Nothing at all. We&#8217;ll just count this as a strike against me right off the bat.<\/li>\n<li>DANY. DANY. DANY. How many ways do I love you, Dany? So, she&#8217;s remaining in one place to rule Meereen, and Jorah has been banished. OH GOD. Well, here&#8217;s my first prediction for her: I think she&#8217;ll make a terrible mistake because she has no one to stop her anymore.<\/li>\n<li>I think that by the end of the book, she&#8217;ll be able to ride her dragons.<\/li>\n<li>Someone&#8217;s face will get melted off by a dragon.<\/li>\n<li>Why am I even typing words at this point?<\/li>\n<li>ONE CHAPTER FROM VARYS&#8217; POINT OF VIEW. JUST ONE. PLEASE.<\/li>\n<li>Okay, DEATHS. I will put each name separately because it cannot be a GRRM book without LOTS OF DEATHS.<\/li>\n<li>Bronn. \ud83d\ude41<\/li>\n<li>Ser Jorah Mormont.<\/li>\n<li>Gilly.<\/li>\n<li>Pycelle.<\/li>\n<li>Petyr Baelish.<\/li>\n<li>Janos Slynt.<\/li>\n<li>Pyp. (NOOOOOO.)<\/li>\n<li>Stannis. And let me add to that: Melisandre will do it. She&#8217;s clearly vying for some sort of power, and he&#8217;s the only one standing in her way.<\/li>\n<li>Roose Bolton.<\/li>\n<li>And my last prediction: A chapter from the perspective of Ramsay Snow. Because we keep reading about him secondhand, and it&#8217;s about time we heard from the man himself.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div><span style=\"font-size: small;\"><span class=\"Apple-style-span\" style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Well, this should be fun.\u00c2\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Well, after the tumultuous experience that was reading A Storm of Swords, I still can&#8217;t say that I feel totally prepared for anything to come in this series. These books are BLEAK AS HELL. But I will, yet again, make &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/2011\/10\/mark-reads-a-feast-for-crows-predictions\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[82],"tags":[110,85,111,23,109],"class_list":["post-595","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-a-song-of-ice-and-fire","tag-a-feast-for-crows","tag-george-rr-martin","tag-i-am-not-prepared","tag-mark-reads","tag-mark-reads-a-feast-for-crows"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/595","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=595"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/595\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=595"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=595"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=595"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}<!-- WP Super Cache is installed but broken. 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