In the tenth part of\u00c2\u00a0Carpe Jugulum<\/i>, the witches try to determine their next course of action. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to read\u00c2\u00a0Discworld<\/i>.\u00c2\u00a0<\/p>\n
So, let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s start here and then back up, because\u00c2\u00a0wow<\/i>, does this hit the nail on the head:<\/p>\n In the shocked silence, there was a faint clinking noise from Nanny\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s sideboard.<\/p>\n Magrat coughed. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153J-just like the old days,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she said. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Arguing all the time.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Despite that this section opens with the trio openly discussing the stereotypical roles of witches, I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t realize just how true this rang. They all slipped into these roles in a shockingly short amount of time! Yet I found it more interesting that this\u00c2\u00a0felt<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0like the many arguments we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d experienced between Granny, Nanny, and Magrat in past\u00c2\u00a0Discworld<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0books. On the one hand, that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s cool because I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m really excited about the possibility that Agnes will remain a permanent part of the Ramtops coven\u00c2\u00a0and<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0Magrat will continue to be a witch alongside the other roles. But: no Granny??? Not sure I like\u00c2\u00a0that<\/i>, y\u00e2\u20ac\u2122all. Granted, we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re still only halfway through this book, so a lot can happen in that amount of time.<\/p>\n For example: the Nac mac Feegle! Seriously, I should have put that together after I realized how far the Magpyrs had gone to create their \u00e2\u20ac\u0153perfect\u00e2\u20ac\u009d societies. Of\u00c2\u00a0course<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0they wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be cool with these blue-skinned, red-haired pixies\u00c2\u00a0living\u00c2\u00a0in Uberwald. They\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re not the\u00c2\u00a0right<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0kind of person, are they? What\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s so wild to me is that the Nac mac Feegle\u00c2\u00a0technically<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0qualify for the Magpyrs\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 horrible rating system. Remember when the Count said that certain creatures where \u00e2\u20ac\u0153unfit\u00e2\u20ac\u009d for survival? Well.. I mean, the Nac mac Feegle can literally phase out of sight to protect themselves, and they possess an UNGODLY amount of strength in their tiny bodies. Are they\u00c2\u00a0totally<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0fit for survival?\u00c2\u00a0Obviously, we all know that the Magpyrs don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t actually make any sense, and their logic is a justification for bigotry against other races and species. Hell, they might even truly\u00c2\u00a0believe<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0their own nonsense. (I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not sure if that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s scarier than if they knew they were bullshitting everyone.)<\/p>\n So, while the Nac mac Feegle are given an island by Nanny (to be later gifted by King Verence, of course), Nanny comes up with the idea of distract the vampyres with an honest-to-gods mob. While I love literally everything about this idea \u00e2\u20ac\u201c including the fact that Nanny summons Jason to just \u00e2\u20ac\u0153get the word out\u00e2\u20ac\u009d on a mob storming the castle \u00e2\u20ac\u201c I am lost as to how this might work. Won\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t the Count be able to control every person who shows up to be part of the mob? I suppose that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the point, though. In the time he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s occupied with that, I figured, Nanny, Agnes and Magrat would sneak back into the castle. Right?<\/p>\n And it worked! I was genuinely impressed, y\u00e2\u20ac\u2122all!!! THEY DID IT. And then I got to Agnes\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s confrontation with Demone and Crimson and\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 goddamn. In one sense, they are a joke. The way they dress and act is a quiet parody, but they still scared the shit out of me. When Vlad showed up after that??? OH GOD, I DON\u00e2\u20ac\u2122T LIKE HIM. And I worry that of all the vampyres, he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the one who might get to Agnes. However, I noticed that Perdita is \u00e2\u20ac\u0153appearing\u00e2\u20ac\u009d more in Agnes\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s personality. She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s learning to be more forceful, to refuse people\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s shit, to do bold things. Even if she was just trying to make conversation, I\u00c2\u00a0died<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0at this line:<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You mean vampirism is like\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 pyramid selling?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d said Agnes.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n BLESS HER NOW AND BLESS HER FOR ALL ETERNITY. Now I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve got the mental image of the Magpyres going door-to-door selling timeshares in Uberwald,\u00c2\u00a0I love this entirely too much<\/i>. Except it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s\u00c2\u00a0barely<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0a joke, isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t it? So much of what we learn here as Vlad \u00e2\u20ac\u0153introduces\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Agnes to the long Magpyr line is meant to hint at the evolution of this specific family. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s\u00c2\u00a0got<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0to be why the Count focuses so heavily on this bizarre application of social Darwinism: who is fit to survive? Who has adapted best? Who deserves to be in this world? Take that sequence where Vlad goes \u00e2\u20ac\u0153back\u00e2\u20ac\u009d in time through the paintings of his family members. That is Pratchett\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s way of pushing the issue\u00c2\u00a0to the forefront: the Magpyrs are trying to survive by\u00c2\u00a0changing<\/i>. THROUGH SELF-HELP PHILOSOPHIES, I MIGHT ADD, which makes this terribly funny for about five seconds because Agnes throws holy water on Vlad and soaks him. His response?<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Look<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0at this waistcoat! Will you\u00c2\u00a0look<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0at this waistcoat? Do you know what water does to silk? You just never get it out! No matter what you do, there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s always a mark.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n I wanted to laugh, but it was just so\u00c2\u00a0horrifying<\/i>. Couple this with Vlad\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s reaction to Agnes swinging an axe on him \u00e2\u20ac\u201c !!!!!! SHE IS SO AMAZING I LOVE HER \u00e2\u20ac\u201c and you have every reason to believe that, thus far, these vampyres have no weaknesses at all. Was Vlad\u00c2\u00a0serious<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0when he joked with Agnes about chopping off his head? Oh my god, I honestly wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be surprised at this point. Is there\u00c2\u00a0nothing<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0that they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re vulnerable to at this point?<\/p>\n Whew, this book is a LOT.<\/p>\n https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=WAcGo5zQSrE<\/p>\n Mark Links Stuff<\/b><\/p>\n – I am now on Patreon<\/a>! There are various levels of support, from $1 up to whatever you want! You’ll get to read a private blog, extra reviews, and other such rewards. I POST A LOT OF CUTE PHOTOS, OKAY. Think of it like a private Tumblr blog that only SPECIAL PEOPLE get to read.<\/b> In the tenth part of\u00c2\u00a0Carpe Jugulum, the witches try to determine their next course of action. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to read\u00c2\u00a0Discworld.\u00c2\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[451],"tags":[526,463,248],"class_list":["post-4114","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-discworld","tag-carpe-jugulum","tag-mark-reads-discworld","tag-terry-pratchett"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4114","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4114"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4114\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4114"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4114"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4114"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n– I have updated my list of conventions and events for the remainder of the year and much of next year.\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Check the full list of events on my Tour Dates \/ Appearances page.<\/a>
\n– My Master Schedule<\/a> is updated for the near and distant future for most projects, so please check it often.\u00c2\u00a0My next Double Features for Mark Watches have been announced here.<\/a>
\n<\/b>-\u00c2\u00a0Mark Does Stuff is on Facebook!<\/a>\u00c2\u00a0I’ve got a community page up that I’m running. Guaranteed shenanigans!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"