In the fourth part of\u00c2\u00a0Carpe Jugulum<\/i>, EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS INCREDIBLE AND I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122M READY FOR THE UNBELIEVABLE JOURNEY I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122M ABOUT TO TAKE. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to read\u00c2\u00a0Discworld<\/i>.<\/p>\n
Trigger Warning: For talk of consent and gaslighting<\/b>.<\/p>\n
JUST KIDDING, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122M NOT READY AT ALL. Oh my god, this was\u00c2\u00a0breathtaking<\/i>. To say it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s unexpected is an understatement; I honestly don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think a\u00c2\u00a0Discworld<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0book has ramped up this quickly\u00c2\u00a0ever<\/i>. Pratchett drops this nightmare on us so casually, and then we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re just supposed to accept it because IT\u00e2\u20ac\u2122S ALREADY MOVING FORWARD.<\/p>\n
Let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s talk. Because this starts off with a distraction: baby Esmerelda\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s bizarre middle name. As the characters discuss whether or not they can change it (not really) and whether it matters (not really, as the Lancre people like weird sounding names\u00c2\u00a0anyway<\/i>), I had forgot about the \u00e2\u20ac\u0153guests\u00e2\u20ac\u009d who arrived at the start of the scene because\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 well, Moocow Poorchick. I LOVE THAT NAME, I DON\u00e2\u20ac\u2122T CARE. I once named a dog Potato Moo McPuppydots, so SHUT UP. (I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m also a big fan of Total Biscuit. Sounds like a great band, too.) I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t pick up on the importance of Oats\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s migraine either, even though I knew the Magpyr clan were in the room. Didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t make the connection, didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think much of Agnes\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s awkward conversation with Reverend Oats, and pushed forward because everything was funny and great and then:<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Can I get you a drink, Miss Nitt?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Look, Pratchett invokes a very specific trope here: that thing where a villain reveals they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re a villain by accidentally saying a person\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s name before they introduce themselves. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s usually pretty effective, and look no further than my video for evidence of it! I knew this man was one of the Magpyr vampyres anyway, but this was all the confirmation I needed. I was prepared! He was a vampire and he was going to secretly infiltrate the party and\u00c2\u00a0I WAS 100% WRONG.<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0Even as Agnes realized something was up, I was so certain about what was unfolding.<\/p>\n Hell, look at the next scene!\u00c2\u00a0Nanny brings Agnes outside and very quickly, she figures out that Verence invited vampires to be a part of the naming ceremony. (He didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t, though, did he?) It plays right into her perception of Verence as being too friendly to other nations and cultures, and she is wrong, and I am wrong, and it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s\u00c2\u00a0all wrong<\/i>. The Magpyr clan feels like a stand-in for a lot of things, but in this moment, Nanny sees them \u00e2\u20ac\u201c and their family motto of\u00c2\u00a0Carpe Jugulum<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0\u00e2\u20ac\u201c as a threat to everything that makes Lancre special. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just\u00c2\u00a0silly<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0to her that Verence would even entertain the idea that a bunch of vampires from \u00c3\u0153berwald should be allowed in the palace.<\/p>\n And then it all starts to fall apart. That conversation with Igor\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 what the\u00c2\u00a0hell<\/i>, y\u00e2\u20ac\u2122all??? So, apparently, these new vampyres aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t \u00e2\u20ac\u0153old school.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d His mention of their clothing choices seemed odd, as did their insistence to keep their own castle free of squeaky hinges and spooky lighting. Initially, I thought Pratchett was merely making a joke about our expectations of vampires, but no, once again I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m wrong. Surely, they were just a tad weird, but they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re\u00c2\u00a0vampyres<\/i>. Nothing shocking there, right?<\/p>\n I cannot even deal with the scene inside the castle. I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t.<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I think you were talking about vampires,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he said, taking a garlic pasty from Agnes\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s tray and biting into it with every sign of enjoyment. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Could I be of assistance?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n Nanny looked him up and down.<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Do you know much about them?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she said.<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, I\u00c2\u00a0am<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0one,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he said. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So I suppose the answer is yes.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n In just one exchange, Pratchett shifts this book into another fucking stratosphere. Because I always figured that the Magpyr infiltration plan would be subtle, I was shocked to high hell to watch it all unfold so OPENLY. Thus, that scene earlier, where Vlad says Agnes\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s name before she reveals it, is\u00c2\u00a0not<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0the trope I thought it was. It was a hint that the Magpyr vampyres were just going to waltz in, take over everything in a few minutes, and do so without a care in the world. Watching them overpower the minds over everyone in that room (well,\u00c2\u00a0almost<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0everyone) was horrifying, and it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s one of the creepiest things I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve read in a\u00c2\u00a0Discworld<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0book. These vampires violate the consent of the attendees, and then present an alternate version of reality to them. IT\u00e2\u20ac\u2122S SO SCARY.<\/p>\n Of note, however, is the strange reactions experienced by Reverend Oats and Agnes. The Reverend\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s migraine increases in intensity\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 which must be because of the vampyres, right? But\u00c2\u00a0why<\/i>? Why that reaction? Agnes, however, reacts in a way that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s more understandable to me: her dual identity\/nature means that\u00c2\u00a0there is a mind within her that the vampyres can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t control.\u00c2\u00a0<\/i>It is\u00c2\u00a0Perdita<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0who escapes the weird mind control of the Magpyrs, though not without a vicious fight.<\/p>\n The whole thing was electrifying to read; it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a strange thing to get villains who monologue about their intentions at the\u00c2\u00a0start<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0of a book, you know??? Watching each of these characters fight the terrible logic running through their brains was upsetting as well. (I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m thinking of Verence in particularly, who sweats up a storm as the Count of Magpyr details his life of murder.) But Agnes, my\u00c2\u00a0god<\/i>, fights harder than anyone else, and Perdita provides her with a chance to oppose the Magpyrs, though it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not exactly successful in every respect. But she gets out of the castle! She escapes the Magpyrs! She gets Nanny out, too, and then THE SCARIEST PART HAPPENS!!!!<\/p>\n She rushed into the kitchen, gripping her left wrist with her right hand. It shook itself free, grabbed a knife from the draining board, and stabbed it into the wall, dragging it so that it formed crude letters in the crumbling plaster:<\/p>\n VMPIR<\/p>\n It dropped the knife, grabbed at the hair on the back of Agnes\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s head, and thrust her face within inches of the letters.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Like, I always just assumed that Perdita was just Agnes\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s internal monologue, a way for her to express how she really felt. But this suggests so much more, as if Perdita is a second\u00c2\u00a0mind<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0within Agnes. Regardless, I AM SO READY FOR THIS STRUGGLE. Honestly, I thought\u00c2\u00a0Jingo<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0had a great opening pace, but this is RIDICULOUS. I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t wait.<\/p>\n https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=guxhpRuDM4Q<\/p>\n Mark Links Stuff<\/b><\/p>\n – I am now on Patreon<\/a>! There are various levels of support, from $1 up to whatever you want! You’ll get to read a private blog, extra reviews, and other such rewards. I POST A LOT OF CUTE PHOTOS, OKAY. Think of it like a private Tumblr blog that only SPECIAL PEOPLE get to read.<\/b> In the fourth part of\u00c2\u00a0Carpe Jugulum, EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS INCREDIBLE AND I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122M READY FOR THE UNBELIEVABLE JOURNEY I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122M ABOUT TO TAKE. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to read\u00c2\u00a0Discworld.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[451],"tags":[526,463,248],"class_list":["post-4100","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-discworld","tag-carpe-jugulum","tag-mark-reads-discworld","tag-terry-pratchett"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4100","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4100"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4100\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4100"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4100"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4100"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n– I have updated my list of conventions and events for the remainder of the year and much of next year.\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Check the full list of events on my Tour Dates \/ Appearances page.<\/a>
\n– My Master Schedule<\/a> is updated for the near and distant future for most projects, so please check it often.\u00c2\u00a0My next Double Features for Mark Watches have been announced here.<\/a>
\n<\/b>-\u00c2\u00a0Mark Does Stuff is on Facebook!<\/a>\u00c2\u00a0I’ve got a community page up that I’m running. Guaranteed shenanigans!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"