{"id":238,"date":"2011-03-07T07:00:41","date_gmt":"2011-03-07T15:00:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/?p=238"},"modified":"2011-03-06T17:19:16","modified_gmt":"2011-03-07T01:19:16","slug":"mark-reads-mockingjay-chapter-27","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/2011\/03\/mark-reads-mockingjay-chapter-27\/","title":{"rendered":"Mark Reads ‘Mockingjay’: Chapter 27"},"content":{"rendered":"

In the twenty-seventh chapter of Mockingjay<\/em>, I really need to be held. Tightly. Forever<\/em>. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to read Mockingjay<\/em>.<\/p>\n

HOW IS COLLINS GOING TO WRAP THIS UP.<\/p>\n

In the stunned reaction that follows, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m aware of one sound. Snow\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s laughter. An awful gurgling cackle accompanied by an eruption of foamy blood when the coughing begins. I see him bend forward, spewing out his life, until the guards block him from my sight.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
I cannot believe she did this. I mean, it makes perfect sense, it just feels right<\/em>, but\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6oh my god, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s really happening. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<\/p>\n
As the gray uniforms begin to converge on me, I think of what my brief future as the assassin of Panem\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s new president holds. The interrogation, probable torture, certain public execution. Having, yet again, to say my final goodbyes to the handful of people who still maintain a hold on my heart.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Well, this is how it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s going to end, isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t it? Katniss has sacrified her life and well-being to assure that Panem does not have Coin leading the country. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a real testament to her personal integrity and her bravery. I was so upset at her for saying yes to allowing another Hunger Games that I never considered that she was playing us all. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s even more ironic because she went to the Capitol to kill Snow, when it was really Coin who she needed to kill all along.<\/p>\n
The prospect of facing my mother, who will now be entirely alone in the world, decides it.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Good night,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I whisper to the bow in my hand and feel it go still. I raise my left arm and twist my neck down to rip off the pill in my sleeve. Instead my teeth sink into flesh. I yank my head back in confusion to find myself looking into Peeta\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s eyes, only now they hold my gaze. Blood runs from the teeth marks on the hand he clamped over my nightlock.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Oh my god, Peeta, what have you done??? I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even know what to think about this. I know Peeta wants to save her, but is he guaranteeing her more torture and pain at the hands of the government? Oh gray areas, WHY ARE YOU SO PREVALENT IN THIS BOOK?<\/p>\n
The guards lift me above the fray, where I continue to thrash as I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m conveyed over the crush of people. I start screaming for Gale. I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t find him in the throng, but he will know what I want. A good clean shot to end it all. Only there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s no arrow, no bullet. Is it possible he can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t see me? No. Above us, on the giant screens placed around the City Circle, everyone can watch the whole thing being played out. He sees, he knows, but he doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t follow through. Just as I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t when he was captured. Sorry excuses for hunters and friends. Both of us.<\/p>\n
I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m on my own.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
After all this time, Collins still knows how to write these tense and frightening scenes with brilliance. If there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s anything that I already know I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m going to take from this series, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s that Suzanne Collins\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s greatest skill is in writing action. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a complete justification for having these books be in first-person present and it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s allowed us to live entirely in the moments of Katniss\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s world.<\/p>\n
In this case, we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re dropped into the uncertain and terrifying experience of Katniss after having assassinated Coin. She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s taken to her old room in the Training Center, dragged through tunnels and passages by a handful of guards, and deposited, blindfolded and handcuffed, into this room. Her cuffs are removed before she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s locked in and Katniss surverys the damage.<\/p>\n
It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a struggle to get to my feet and peel off my Mockingjay suit. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m badly bruised and might have a broken finger or two, but it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s my skin that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s paid most dearly for my struggle with the guards. The new pink stuff has shredded like tissue paper and blood seeps through the laboratory-grown cells. No medics show up, though, and as I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m far too gone to care, I crawl up onto the mattress, expecting to bleed to death.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
I said it before, but it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s worthy of being repeated again: I feel entirely helpless. Hopeless, too. Collins has created that sort of atmosphere with her story, where even a singular scene in which something good<\/em> finally happens to Katniss would at least make me feel a little bit better. But it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just tragedy on top of another tragedy here, and I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t hardly stand it. And it only gets worse:<\/p>\n
Jumping to my death\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not an option\u00e2\u20ac\u201dthe window glass must be a foot thick. I can make an excellent noose, but there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s nothing to hang myself from. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s possible I could hoard my pills and then knock myself off with a lethal dose, except that I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sure I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m being watched round the clock. For all I know, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m on live television at this very moment while commentators try to analyze what could possibly have motivated me to kill Coin. The surveillance makes almost any suicide attempt impossible. Taking my life is the Capitol\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s privilege. Again.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m very happy Collins makes this distinction at the end of this section, because I also think it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s important to note that even in the most extreme sense, the Capitol has absolute control over Katniss. She doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even own her life, and despite that the war is over, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s still very much a reality of her existence. And that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s terrifying.<\/p>\n
Instead, Katniss decides that she can give up, that that is something the new Capitol can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t control. She resolves to not eat, drink, or take any of her pills, but once her morphling withdrawal kicks in, that plan is pretty much obliterated, so she surmises that it might be possible to die from an addiction to morphling. (Wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t that take a really long time, Katniss?)<\/p>\n
It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s at this point that Katniss starts singing. We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re not given much context to it, except that we know she does it often, remembering the songs her father had taught her before he died. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s strangely\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6uplifting? I mean, the concept of her finding her voice and using it to recall such a positive memory is the first moment of calm I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve had in a long, long time reading this book. But it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s shrouded in frustration, as it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s revealed that weeks<\/em> have passed without anyone coming into contact with Katniss.<\/p>\n
What are they doing, anyway? What\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the holdup out there? How difficult can it be to arrange the execution of one murderous girl? I continue with my own annihilation. My body\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s thinner than it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s ever been and my battle against hunger is so fierce that sometimes the animal part of me gives in to the temptation of buttered bread or roasted meat.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re back to this being about hunger again, and I think it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s something I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve sort of unconsciously avoided talking about. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s true that food was much more steady in Mockingjay<\/em> than ever before. (Well, except for Victory Village.) But now Katniss is willing rejecting it as a sign of protest. She hadn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t done this before, had she? Regardless, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a huge moment of independence for Katniss, who is sick of being pawns for everyone else.<\/p>\n
They can fatten me up. They can give me a full body polish, dress me up, and make me beautiful again. They can design dream weapons that come to life in my hands, but they will never again brainwash me into the necessity of using them. I no longer feel allegiance to these monsters called human beings, despite being one myself.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
$\"\"$ <\/a><\/p>\n
Because something is significantly wrong with a creature that sacrifies its children\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s lives to settle its differences. You can spin it any way you like. Snow thought the Hunger Games were an efficient means of control. Coin thought the parachutes would expedite the war. But in the end, who does it benefit? No one. The truth is, it benefits no one to live in a world where these things happen.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Thank you, 758 other people who highlighted this passage, for agreeing with me. This realization by Katniss is, while heavy-handed, monumental. IT\u00e2\u20ac\u2122S TIME FOR HER TO BE A BADASS ON HER OWN.<\/p>\n
After two days of my lying on my mattress with no attempt to eat, drink, or even take a morphling tablet, the door to my room opens. Someone crosses around the bed into my field of vision. Haymitch. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Your trial\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s over,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he says. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Come on. We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re going home.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
But\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6.but\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6badassery! Wait. WHAT??!?!?!?!<\/strong> There was a trial??? WHAT THE FUCK.<\/p>\n
I have to complain a bit, y\u00e2\u20ac\u2122all. It has to happen! I can accept the context of the situation, but this is now like\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6the third time something GIGANTICALLY HUGE has happened and Collins is all, LOL ALL U GET IS A SUMMARY LOL. Particularly<\/em> this summary is a bit grating, considering\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6.well, ok, let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s get to it.<\/p>\n
Haymitch stays with Katniss as she is taken care of and prepped to leave the Capitol, where she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s taken aboard a hovercraft with Plutarch and Haymitch.<\/p>\n
After I shot Coin, there was pandemonium. When the ruckus died down, they discovered Snow\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s body, still tethered to the post. Opinions differ on whether he choked to death while laughing or was crushed by the crowd. No one really cares.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
I love that no one cares, but wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t it have been clear if he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d merely choked versus BEING CRUSHED TO DEATH.<\/em> Those are two very distinct deaths.<\/p>\n
Anyway, moving on.<\/p>\n
An emergency election was thrown together and Paylor was voted in as president. Plutarch was appointed secretary of communications, which means he sets the programming for the airwaves.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Well\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s nice, right?<\/p>\n
The first big televised event was my trial, in which he was also a star witness. In my defense, of course.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
And now comes my gigantic, huge complaint: WHY WASN\u00e2\u20ac\u2122T KATNISS A WITNESS AT HER OWN TRIAL?<\/strong> It doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even make any sense:<\/p>\n
Although most of the credit for my exoneration must be given to Dr. Aurelius, who apparently earned his naps by presenting me as a hopeless, shell-shocked lunatic.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s it<\/em>? So no one ever thought, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hey, why don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t we let Katniss explain why she did it and she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll tell everyone Coin murdered children and then that would be a much better defense than what we just gave\u00e2\u20ac\u009d?<\/p>\n
I mean\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6in terms of what these characters did to Katniss, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s pretty fucked that they don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even think she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s capable of defending herself. But that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not my complaint. A lot of characters make poor decisions in this book and it honestly adds to the realism of it all. What I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t like is that a moment so potentially huge for Katniss (her trial) is completely ignored. This feels sooooooooo lazy to me. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m curious to know how all of you feel about this, since apparently the ending of this book is a bit contentious in the fandom.<\/p>\n
But further on the point, I simply don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get how they can all ignore the obvious. I would understand Plutarch not wanting to get involved in going after Coin\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s reputation, so it makes sense that he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d step in to defend Katniss in a different way. But no one else thought that it might be good to say, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153HEY THIS IS WHY COIN IS DEAD, MAYBE WE SHOULD LIKE NOT DO THIS AGAIN<\/em>\u00e2\u20ac\u009d?<\/p>\n
Ugh. So yeah. I AM NOT A FAN OF THIS.<\/p>\n
We learn Katniss is supposed to stay in District 12 for the near future as part of a condition of her acquittal, though others from the rebel team have jobs to do, which makes Katniss wonder if there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s more war coming.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, not now. Now we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re in that sweet period where everyone agrees that our recent horrors should never be repeated,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he says. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153But collective thinking is usually short-lived. We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re fickle, stupid beings with poor memories and a great gift for self-destruction. Although who knows? Maybe this will be it, Katniss.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153What?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I ask.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153The time it sticks. Maybe we are witnessing the evolution of the human race. Think about that.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Well, christ, we can ONLY HOPE SO at this point. This book<\/em>, guys. This book<\/em><\/strong>.<\/p>\n
After dropping off Plutarch, Katniss wonders why Haymitch is coming back with her to District 12, worried that Haymitch is meant to watch over her.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You have to look after me, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t you? As my mentor?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He shrugs. Then I realize what it means. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153My mother\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not coming back.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Oh, fucking hell. I CANNOT TAKE ANYMORE SAD.<\/p>\n
He pulls an envelope from his jacket pocket and hands it to me. I examine the delicate, perfectly formed writing. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s helping to start up a hospital in District Four. She wants you to call as soon as we get in.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d My finger traces the graceful swoop of letters. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You know why she can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t come back.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Yes, I know why. Because between my father and Prim and the ashes, the place is too painful to bear. But apparently not for me. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Do you want to know who else won\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be there?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I say. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I want to be surprised.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
It doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t matter that they war has been won. These people<\/em> cannot win, and they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be haunted by the brutality on both sides for the rest of their lives. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a hard pill to swallow, but Collins isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t willing to ignore that the events of this series have ramifications that are permanent. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t imagine there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s going to be a happy ending to this.<\/p>\n
When they land in the Victor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Village in Twelve, Katniss\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s house is the only one with lights on inside of it, so I feared the worst: Peeta had stayed behind. Katniss, completely alone, heads inside to discover a fire built by\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6well, we don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know until the next morning, when Greasy Sae wakes up Katniss while she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s making breakfast. Katniss doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know if she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s being paid to do this or if it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s out of the kindness of her own heart, but Greasy Sae seems to come every breakfast and dinner for Katniss.<\/p>\n
I have no idea how much time passes, but since Coin\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s murder was during the winter, when Greasy Sae says that \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Spring\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s in the air today,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d to Katniss, I have to assume that months just went by. Months entirely by herself. No mother, no Gale, no Peeta, no Haymitch, no one but Greasy Sae and her granddaughter. This may be the saddest ending to anything I have ever read. (Well, I can think of one book sadder than this, but I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even want to recommend it because then I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m technically spoiling it.)<\/p>\n
When Katniss denies the chance to leave the house because she doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have a bow, Greasy Sae directs her to the study. Hours after Greasy Sae leaves, Katniss\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s curiosity gets the best of her:<\/p>\n
In the study, where I had my tea with President Snow, I find a box with my father\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s hunting jacket, our plant book, my parents\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 wedding photo, the spile Haymitch sent in, and the locket Peeta gave me in the clock arena. The two bows and a sheath of arrows Gale rescued on the night of the firebombing lie on the desk.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m reminded of the opening of Deathly Hallows<\/em> when Harry goes through all his possessions before he decides what he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s going to leave behind. These are pieces from all three novels, physical reminders of the journeys she has been on. And goddamn it, I WILL NOT CRY. I WILL NOT CRY.<\/em><\/p>\n
I wake with a start. Pale morning light comes around the edges of the shutters. The scraping shovel continues. Still half in the nightmare, I run down the hall, out the front door, and around the side of the house, because now I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m pretty sure I can scream at the dead. When I see him, I pull up short. His face is flushed from digging up the ground under the windows. In a wheelbarrow are five scraggly bushes.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You are back,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I say.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
WHAT.<\/em><\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Dr. Aurelius wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t let me leave the Capitol until yesterday,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Peeta says. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153By the way, he said to tell you he can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t keep pretending he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s treating you forever. You have to pick up the phone.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
$\"\"$
\n<\/strong><\/p>\n
oh my god OH MY GOD!!!!<\/p>\n
He looks well. Thin and covered with burn scars like me, but his eyes have lost that clouded, tortured look. He\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s frowning slightly, though, as he takes me in. I make a halfhearted effort to push my hair out of my eyes and realize it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s matted into clumps. I feel defensive. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153What are you doing?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I went to the woods this morning and dug these up. For her,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he says. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I thought we could plant them along the side of the house.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
My heart has just exploded. Peeta. Peeta is back. PEETA IS BACK<\/strong>.<\/p>\n
I look at the bushes, the clods of dirt hanging from their roots, and catch my breath as the word rose<\/em> registers. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m about to yell vicious things at Peeta when the full name comes to me. Not plain rose but evening primrose. The flower my sister was named for. I give Peeta a nod of assent and hurry back into the house, locking the door behind me.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m speechless. Not only is Peeta back, but he seems to be healing, as evident by his completely gutting act of creating a memorial to Prim. I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t. I CANNOT. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t fucking cry<\/em>.<\/p>\n
The smell\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s very faint but still laces the air. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s there. The white rose among the dried flowers in the vase. Shriveled and fragile, but holding on to that unnatural perfection cultivated in Snow\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s greenhouse. I grab the vase, stumble down to the kitchen, and throw its contents into the embers. As the flowers flare up, a burst of blue flame envelops the rose and devours it. Fire beats roses again. I smash the vase on the floor for good measure.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
It doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t really<\/em> need to be said again that Collins is heavy-handed with her metaphors, but at this point, I plain don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t care. This scene is so necessary for Katniss, to provide her with a physical catharsis for the way that Snow has ruined her life in so many ways.<\/p>\n
Fire beats roses again.<\/p>\n
That night we learn more about what\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s happened since the end of the war from Greasy Sae.<\/p>\n
Over the eggs, I ask her, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Where did Gale go?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153District Two. Got some fancy job there. I see him now and again on the television,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she says.<\/p>\n
I dig around inside myself, trying to register anger, hatred, longing. I find only relief.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Wow. So that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s it? Gale\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s gone. And he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not coming back. THIS BOOK IS SO SAD.<\/p>\n
But it only continues to get sadder, despite that Peeta has returned. (Where is he right now, by the way?) Katniss finally decides to head out to hunt. On the way out to the meadow, she passes the mayor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s house, which has been reduced to rubble, and she asks if anyone was found.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Whole family. And the two people who worked for them,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Thom tells me.<\/p>\n
Madge. Quiet and kind and brave. The girl who gave me the pin that gave me my name. I swallow hard. Wonder if she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be joining the cast of my nightmares tonight. Shoveling the ashes into my mouth. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I thought maybe, since he was the mayor\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think being the mayor of Twelve put the odds in his favor,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d says Thom.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Realistic, sure. Utterly depressing? Unbelievably so. But, yet again, as you all told me, I am perpetually unprepared.<\/p>\n
The Meadow\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s gone, or at least dramatically altered. A deep pit has been dug, and they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re lining it with bones, a mass grave for my people.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
$\"\"$ <\/p>\n
Seriously, Collins, what are you doing to me.<\/em> After everything that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s happened, I feel as if Collins is giving us the pieces to understand how permanently these people have been changed, how their home was taken away from them and destroyed, and how war will live on in their lives. I felt stronger about this idea as Katniss heads out to her meeting spot with Gale, but knowing that he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll never show up again. Even though I feel better about Peeta being around Katniss, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m still sad for the way things have turned out.<\/p>\n
There is a brief moment of joy here, though:<\/p>\n
My head snaps around at the hiss, but it takes awhile to believe he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s real. How could he have gotten here? I take in the claw marks from some wild animal, the back paw he holds slightly above the ground, the prominent bones in his face. He\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s come on foot, then, all the way from 13. Maybe they kicked him out or maybe he just couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t stand it there without her, so he came looking.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
See? I told you that Buttercup was a thousand times better than you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll ever be. Still, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a moment that is then completely sideswiped by the sadness of it all.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153It was the waste of a trip. She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not here,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I tell him. Buttercup hisses again. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not here. You can hiss all you like. You won\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t find Prim.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d At her name, he perks up. Raises his flattened ears. Begins to meow hopefully. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Get out!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He dodges the pillow I throw at him. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Go away! There\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s nothing left for you here!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I start to shake, furious with him. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not coming back! She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s never ever coming back here again!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I grab another pillow and get to my feet to improve my aim. Out of nowhere, the tears begin to pour down my cheeks. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s dead.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I clutch my middle to dull the pain. Sink down on my heels, rocking the pillow, crying. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s dead, you stupid cat. She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s dead.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d A new sound, part crying, part singing, comes out of my body, giving voice to my despair. Buttercup begins to wail as well.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
JESUS. CHRIST. NEVER. PREPARED. FOR ANY OF THIS. Ugh, I had tears in my eyes reading this part. THIS IS POSSIBLY ONE OF THE MOST DEPRESSING SCENES EVER. I am still shocked that this is a YA novel only because most things ever are not this sad<\/em>. Collins has crafted a story about the horrors of war and she didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t refrain from making it as uncomfortable as possible.<\/p>\n
But this moment, beyond just being depressing, is a sign of a shift for Katniss. Well, for our characters in general, too. For Katniss, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a time to start healing herself, to accept those who are remaining in her life as people who can help her begin to feel better and move past the terrors of the war against the Capitol and the absurdity of the Hunger Games.<\/p>\n
In the morning, he sits stoically as I clean the cuts, but digging the thorn from his paw brings on a round of those kitten mews. We both end up crying again, only this time we comfort each other. On the strength of this, I open the letter Haymitch gave me from my mother, dial the phone number, and weep with her as well. Peeta, bearing a warm loaf of bread, shows up with Greasy Sae. She makes us breakfast and I feed all my bacon to Buttercup.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
In the series\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 most evocative and heartbreaking scene yet, we get the absolute sign that Katniss has begun to heal when she speaks to us about the book she is putting together. It becomes a form of therapy for her, and a rather brilliant one at that, a way of her doing exactly what she did with Buttercup: it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a way to realize history and to face what has happened.<\/p>\n
The page begins with the person\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s picture. A photo if we can find it. If not, a sketch or painting by Peeta. Then, in my most careful handwriting, come all the details it would be a crime to forget. Lady licking Prim\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s cheek. My father\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s laugh. Peeta\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s father with the cookies. The color of Finnick\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s eyes. What Cinna could do with a length of silk. Boggs reprogramming the Holo. Rue poised on her toes, arms slightly extended, like a bird about to take flight. On and on. We seal the pages with salt water and promises to live well to make their deaths count. Haymitch finally joins us, contributing twenty-three years of tributes he was forced to mentor. Additions become smaller. An old memory surfaces. A later primrose preserved between the pages. Strange bits of happiness, like the photo of Finnick and Annie\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s newborn son.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
THEY HAD A SON?!?!?! Oh god, it doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t end, does it? I did expect for a moment that Collins was going to reveal that the whole series itself was the \u00e2\u20ac\u0153book\u00e2\u20ac\u009d that Katniss put together, but I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m glad that she didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t. It preserves the urgency of the experience for me and saves it from feeling gimmicky.<\/p>\n
Peeta and I grow back together. There are still moments when he clutches the back of a chair and hangs on until the flashbacks are over. I wake screaming from nightmares of mutts and lost children. But his arms are there to comfort me. And eventually his lips.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
You know what I love most about this? That Collins simply doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t say, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153WELL WE GOT BETTER AND EVERYTHING WAS OK.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d They are both suffering the emotional and mental effects of their pasts. She doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t erase it. She simply says they learn to cope in their own ways. Thank you for this, Suzanne Collins.<\/p>\n
On the night I feel that thing again, the hunger that overtook me on the beach, I know this would have happened anyway. That what I need to survive is not Gale\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s fire, kindled with rage and hatred. I have plenty of fire myself. What I need is the dandelion in the spring. The bright yellow that means rebirth instead of destruction. The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. That it can be good again. And only Peeta can give me that.<\/p>\n
So after, when he whispers, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You love me. Real or not real?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
I tell him, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Real.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Even after all this time, Peeta may still need to use this device to handle what happened to him. Regardless, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a way for Collins to communicate to us that this doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t disappear, that this world was ruined by human greed and sadism, and that the people who fought against it were harmed in ways we couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t imagine. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s one of the most powerful statements, despite its pervasively depressing tone, because it doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t invalidate the story that came before it. If anything, it gives a legitimacy to the experiences of these people because Collins turns the story over to them. What happened to them, and all the people they lost along the way, is the most important thing about this all.<\/p>\n
Ugh, only one more of these left. Excuse me while I cry myself to sleep tonight<\/em>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
In the twenty-seventh chapter of Mockingjay, I really need to be held. Tightly. Forever. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to read Mockingjay.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[31,5],"tags":[21,40,28,23,39,24,29,27],"class_list":["post-238","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mockingjay","category-hunger-games","tag-awful","tag-buttercup-is-better-than-you","tag-katniss-everdeen","tag-mark-reads","tag-mark-reads-mockingjay","tag-mark-reads-the-hunger-games","tag-so-fucked-up","tag-suzanne-collins"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/238","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=238"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/238\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=238"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=238"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=238"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}